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  1. #1
    Thailand Expat
    Smug Farang Bore's Avatar
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    So what's it gunna be... Alzheimer's or cancer?

    These surveys do cheer you up...

    I was just listening to the news and they now say if you have Alzheimer's your less likely to get cancer and vice versa.

    So I'm going with alzheimers , then you can forget you've got cancer.



    Oh and you can forget your Omega 3 as it gives you prostate cancer.

    ...but me I'm going with alzheimers so I would have forgotten to take the Omega 3 and won't be getting cancer anyway.


    ...and I never smoked when I was pregnant..err
    Do you know what nemesis means?

  2. #2
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    Nokturnal's Avatar
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    Alzheimer's .... I've worried that's what would get me for some time. Cancer isn't prevalent in either side of my family so either Alz or heart complications.
    If I stay here long enough I may get smashed up by a garbage truck

  3. #3
    Thailand Expat poorfalang's Avatar
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    ^ or by some falang flying off a hotel balcony

  4. #4
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    or by a sword wielding taxi driver.

  5. #5
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    Alzheimers is probably what will get me. I've already been getting some of the symptoms lately.
    Anyway, I've got to go now as some lady is shouting at me to get out of her house. Give my love to everyone and tell them I miss them and I'll be home for xmas and 2k celebrations.
    Love and Miss.
    XXXXX
    Last edited by Gazza; 11-07-2013 at 01:35 PM.

  6. #6
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    All of them has still gotta be better than that bus driver in pattaya that got his head stuck in the bus door...

  7. #7
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    The doc said to my mate ' we've gone and mixed up your wifes test results - it's either alzheimers or AIDS'.
    'How will I know?' asked my pal.
    'Drop her in town at the bus station and if she finds her way home, don't f*ck her!' says the doc.

  8. #8
    Thailand Expat
    Smug Farang Bore's Avatar
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    Lol

  9. #9
    Mid
    Mid is offline
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smug Farang Bore
    Alzheimer's or cancer?
    what's plan C ?

  10. #10
    Thailand Expat Boon Mee's Avatar
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    Well, I can still smell cloves.

    That's the test to see if yer getting senility...

    Reckon it'll be a pissed-off rice farmer who does me in. My dog got out and ripped up one of his 'prize' mongrels again...

  11. #11
    Mid
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boon Mee
    Well, I can still smell cloves. That's the test to see if yer getting senility...
    so can I , do tell more ?

  12. #12
    Thailand Expat Boon Mee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mid View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Boon Mee
    Well, I can still smell cloves. That's the test to see if yer getting senility...
    so can I , do tell more ?
    That's basically all I know re susceptibility to AZ.

    Supposedly, if you can smell cloves you're OK - if not, break out the diapers and bib.

  13. #13
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    Everybody is going to get prostate cancer....just as long as you get it when you're 60+, then hopefully it won't kill you, because it apparently spreads slowly.

    Get it before then and it's a different story altogether.

  14. #14
    Thailand Expat misskit's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mid View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Smug Farang Bore
    Alzheimer's or cancer?
    what's plan C ?
    Death.

    I chose plan C.

  15. #15
    Thailand Expat Boon Mee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Chuchok View Post
    Everybody is going to get prostate cancer....just as long as you get it when you're 60+, then hopefully it won't kill you, because it apparently spreads slowly.

    Get it before then and it's a different story altogether.
    Yeah, just ask Frank Zappa...

  16. #16
    The cold, wet one
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boon Mee
    Well, I can still smell cloves.
    I've never heard of that and my care qualifications specialise in dementia. I might try taking some cloves in to work and see if any of the less severely affected can identify them for me.

  17. #17
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    Think too much [and the subliminal institutional promotion thereof] about one's health and well-being.......instead of being well and just enjoying your life.

  18. #18
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    Alzheimers. New friends every day.

  19. #19
    or TizYou?
    TizMe's Avatar
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    I've read that at 60 you have a 60% chance of prostate problems (not necessarily cancer)
    at 70 you have a 70% chance.
    at 80 you have a 80% chance.

  20. #20
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    I can't decide between a bullet up through the lower jaw or nap time with a hose of exhaust through a rear window. Or maybe just tie cement blocks to my ankles and go for a dip.

  21. #21
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    Either one hits Me,then I have instructed My Family to buy a massive amount of Heroin,and overdose Me, goodbye tripping.I have never taken Heroin,as it is so addictive,the feel good factor is high.
    Rather die from diamorhine overdose than suffer,and make the Family suffer.

  22. #22
    Ex TD Fat Club VP Dillinger's Avatar
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    I'd rather Parkinsons than Alzheimers

    At least you'd remember where you left your half a pint.

  23. #23
    Ex TD Fat Club VP Dillinger's Avatar
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    On a lighter note, I think I may have bowel cancer

    Last week I was bum gunnin myself away, 2 fingers up there, reading 4-4-2, not a care in the world, as you do.

    then I felt this pain, like a zit or open wound between my sphinter and balls.

    Then when I went to inspect, I could feel a lump and even though the stingin went away a few days ago, I can still feel this lump there.

    Now I have to wait 2 weeks until I can get the Missus to look/burst it, like my mate told me what his dad did to his boils 35 years ago

    Has anyone had bowel cancer on here ?

    I'm not going the Doctors with it.

    Will I die ?

  24. #24
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    Death, via sore throat, via 70ft plunge.

  25. #25
    Ex TD Fat Club VP Dillinger's Avatar
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    Cheers .... where's the sore throat come from ?
    Unlike you Breny my asshole aint linked to my voicebox

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