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  1. #1
    Being chased by sloths DJ Pat's Avatar
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    Why it's not so bad to be in England after all

    The doom mongers are out in force constantly, scolding anyone who shows an inkling of returning to the UK as having some sort of weakness or sickness. When I lived in Thailand I only ever went back to England for three weeks maximum, just enough time to justify why I hated it, and just enough time to be away from nice hot weather instead of miserable drizzly days.

    Why not spend a bit longer and see if the place really has gone tits up? I've had no choice but to do that myself and ok, I am in a very decent, scenic sane part of England but there are things that remind us of how lucky we are to have worked for the rewards we earned, travelling to all those countries, living it up in exotic climates etc.

    Here's a local character in my town: His nickname is 'Tabs' and he's not worked since 1996. His days are spent trawling drinking buddies for small loans to get more booze, and he's been on long term sickness benefit most of his life. He has no intention of ever working and by his appearance, he doesn't wash that often.

    Another character who saunts around town is 'Rachel' who isn't a woman but actually a man who's waiting for his NHS operation soon. He walks about often dressed as a woman, and looks as such: A bloke in womans clothes. That NHS op will have to be exensive to ever float my boat. Rachel has never worked, spent 6 years in prison and stinks of drink.

    Another, 'Scottish' Arthur, is an ex heroin addict who fled to Cornwall when his bridges were all finally burnt again. He stayed in an ex-addicts hostel and has been housed by the local council. He hasn't worked for almost 20 years and spends his days lounging about at home or at the betting shop. He'll never work again, and has zero intention of, opting to spend his days collecting sickness benefit.

    All these characters have never travelled abroad, never eaten at fancy places or partied at the best clubs, as they've had much of their adult lives drinking cheap booze and chasing drinking buddies for loans to see them through to benefit day.

    This is a great intro to something I'm looking to study, social care etc. The oddballs will probably test my patience but should be interesting.

    Makes me think when I'm missing warmer climates that maybe I'm not so badly off after all. At least I eat decent home made food, drink decent wine and smoke good grass.

    And read the Daily Mail.

  2. #2
    Thailand Expat
    wasabi's Avatar
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    The usual story I hear is that there is no work available in Cornwall. Sounds like a good bet,to go live there and never find work.Welfare till grave.

  3. #3
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    So, you are saying you are in the company of pissheads, junkies, transvestites, and suchlike... all sucking the tits of the rest, by claiming benefits of some sort.
    And head it by saying "it's not so bad to be in England after all"
    Interesting viewpoint lol !!!!

    Reg

  4. #4
    Being chased by sloths DJ Pat's Avatar
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    What I really meant was that my life isn't so bad after all when I look at the dregs of society

  5. #5
    Molecular Mixup
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    tired of lying in the sunshine
    staying home to watch the rain

  6. #6
    Neo
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    They're gonna have to introduce conscription
    They're gonna have to take away my prescription

  7. #7
    splendid and tremendous
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    Quote Originally Posted by blue
    tired of lying in the sunshine
    staying home to watch the rain
    Everyone was out in shorts and t-shirt today.

    I was personally still freezing my arse off in t-shirt, jumper and a coat.

  8. #8
    Banned

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    Dreary existence....

  9. #9
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    When the country finally goes bankrupt and the really big race riots break out and finally lead to full scale civil war, I expect you will be heading back to dreary old Thailand....

  10. #10
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    Maybe I am not as adventurous as you Pat, but I would never come into contact with that type of ne'er-do-well let alone know their life stories. Something must be really going wrong with if are you new peers. Why not set up a paypal account and you can go begging for small loans from TD members to buy you drugs with?

    Cold weather
    Ugly women
    40% tax
    4.50 quid pint of beer
    cor bloody hell, the list goes on and on with so many good reasons to not go back.

    Jim.
    Originally Posted by bsnub "No wonder I drive a tesla"

  11. #11
    Being chased by sloths DJ Pat's Avatar
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    These are people who I'm superior to in the British class system

  12. #12
    Thailand Expat
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    How could you possibly know that? They might all be knights of the realm and on a sabatical leeching off of the people at the top end and taking a year sucking off the people on the dole?

    Jim.

  13. #13
    Thailand Expat Boon Mee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Pat View Post
    At least I eat decent home made food, drink decent wine and smoke good grass.
    Heh, that proves this is a Troll Thread!

  14. #14
    Being chased by sloths DJ Pat's Avatar
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    ^nothing wrong with a good healthy lifestyle

  15. #15
    Thailand Expat
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    You're just going through the "justify your decision to stay in the UK" stage of your 5 stages of Grief from moving back to the UK having stay in Asia for a prolonged period.

    1 - dejection - No choice, out of cash and unemployable so home you go.
    2 - Optimism - It will be OK, make some cash and leave the shit hole quick smart and get back to Asia.
    3 - Anger - When you realise the above will never happen, you hate all things Asia. Smeg is locked in this stage
    4 - Justify (as above) - find as many reasons why being back int he UK is actually better.
    5 - acceptance. Realise the dream is over for you now, and slot back into the rat race rut, and be a bore down the pub telling people stories of "back when I lives in thailand, I..." of which only half believe you although it is all true.

  16. #16
    En route
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Pat View Post
    .

    This is a great intro to something I'm looking to study, social care etc. The oddballs will probably test my patience but should be interesting.
    So how do you plan to study this? Follow your misfits around questioning them ?
    Will this be a Smeg like study? Or something a bit more formal?

  17. #17
    Thailand Expat Boon Mee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Pat View Post
    ^nothing wrong with a good healthy lifestyle
    Absolutely not.

    My point is Herb here is Primo and much cheaper than what you're paying...

  18. #18
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    I feel for some people .. utter wastes of space.

    I'm 27...
    I've travelled all over the world had some fantastic experiences done all sorts i reckon i've been living life to the fullest...

    I know people my age from school who have became pregnant early on.. currently living in Social Housing with their three little shitlets.. never been abroad on a cheap Spain trip.. living a pa

    A crate of Carlsberg from ASDA and a fish supper from the Chippy are the highlights of their week.

  19. #19
    Thailand Expat
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    career benefit scum all get their karma when they reach forty or fifty.

    having no ambition, lounging about all day and being paid for it might be fun when you are twenty or thirty, but look at the older people who have been down that path.

    anger fuelled, miserable, prematurely aged, unhealthy and bedraggled toerags with broken families who have nothing to look back on and nothing to look forward to.

    for the working man it is worth paying taxes just to see the results of such indolence and stupidity.

  20. #20
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    Damn! That's really made me change my entire belief about what a toilet the UK is...

  21. #21
    Thailand Expat poorfalang's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Pat
    social care etc
    There is nothing called social care etc, you talk bullocks
    I am not English British or whatever you call it, but i have lived there and worked for 15 years in the NHS
    Benefits? that is the first problem of that country/ second is human rights/ third is religion/ fourth is people like yourself that say (it's not that bad)
    hell ya it's bad. you just don't get it, you are also on the beneficiary side.


    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Pat
    smoke good grass
    good grass, you mean there is good grass in the UK?
    you mean Skunk?
    That Genetically modified high, that leaves you brain sleeping for two days after one spliff?


    a fella that is obviously a junkie himself like the OP taking care of society?
    wake up mate
    you are there because you can't be nowhere else.
    Sorry about me horrible speling

  22. #22
    Thailand Expat Boon Mee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by taxexile View Post
    for the working man it is worth paying taxes just to see the results of such indolence and stupidity.
    If you don't get your head chopped off outside the barracks...

    America is right behind...

  23. #23
    loob lor geezer
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Pat View Post

    What I really meant was that my life isn't so bad after all when I look at the dregs of society
    Not much of a benchmark though is it ? Might not be ' so bad ' but doesn't quite sound good.

  24. #24
    Thailand Expat
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    Living in the UK is like shagging a fat ugly bird. You know yourself that this is not what you aspire to, but for certain people, it is all they can get. However, you say a hole is a hole, and justify why she was a good jump hoping that no one will point out that you had to sprinkle talc on her to find her gash.

  25. #25
    Thailand Expat
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    I was ther for a while.
    Never again if I can help it.
    When I am down and in another country (Greece at the moment) I listen to LBC talk radio and am heartened by how shit Britain really is.

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