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  1. #1
    FarangRed
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    Drunks from Around the World

    I've done some traveling in my days. And this is some of my experience with drunks while abroad.

    British
    Alcohol tolerance: poor. they become sloppy after 4 pints and begin to curse at anything that breaths
    Don't talk about: "soccer".
    Do talk about: "football"
    Who they hate: Other British people
    Who they love: Anyone who was hanging out with them before they were drunk.
    Extra Notes: They are very loud, obnoxious, but fun as hell. A great addition to your night out. Just get ready to defend them.




    Americans
    Alcohol tolerance: medium, however they are used to watered down piss beer so foreign beers can throw them over the edge.
    Don't talk about: gun control and/or your homelands healthcare
    Do talk about: where they were on 9/11.
    Who they hate: whoever their current president is. and muslims once they hit their 6th pint.
    Who they love: jesus or darwin. one or the other, no in between.
    Extra Notes: only loud/obnoxious when surrounded by their own kind. if alone, they become self conscious and try and blend in with the commonwealths.



    Germans
    Alcohol tolerance: high. specifically with beer.
    Don't talk about: WW2. They get awkward.
    Do talk about: Their engineering career.
    Who they hate: obnoxious Brits
    Who they love: weird ass techno music artists
    Extra Notes: Despite their "nazi" stereotype, Germans are very jolly people. seriously though... don't bring up WW2. they go from jolly to creepy serious.



    Australian
    Alcohol tolerance: medium. you can tell they're drunk when they start telling exaggerated stories to try and convince people how manly they are
    Don't talk about: the episode of the Simpsons when they go to Australia. they like to point out the flaws
    Do talk about: "footy". just mention you're aware of its existence and they'll be pleased.
    Who they hate: Kiwi's, Immigrants and Abo's. Nothing more, nothing less.
    Who they love: Julian Assange
    Extra Notes: Don't tell them that their accents sound like Kiwi's because they'll try to sound out the differences and you'll hear no difference. It's a pointless exercise.



    Irish
    Alcohol tolerance: medium, although speech becomes impaired very fast and can eventually become comically violent.
    Don't talk about: the English
    Do talk about: Guinness
    Who they hate: the English
    Who they love: Nobody. They'll pick a fight with a tree or coat rack by the end of the night.
    Extra Notes: Their women are slutty. Charm them by acting non-Irish.



    Also Brits are split up based on North and South. Northerners get funny as fuck but may end up in a fight. Southerners ok to chat to while drunk but will end up pissing on their bed when they get home.

  2. #2
    Thailand Expat
    Ratchaburi's Avatar
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    so we be care full around the british after a couple of pints

  3. #3
    Philippine Expat Davis Knowlton's Avatar
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    ^^Out of ammo. Quite good. Catch you once reloaded.

  4. #4
    Thailand Expat

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    ^How can you be outta ammo, DK?...

  5. #5
    FarangRed
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    There he goes again has a few pints and starts talking of jihad and taking over the world,someone get him a taxi and a kebab before he goes off on one again

  6. #6
    Philippine Expat Davis Knowlton's Avatar
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    ^What about the wee Froggies? Nary a mention of the wine sipping twits.....

  7. #7
    Thailand Expat

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    ^^I think he's in the Mariana Trench with David Cameron...a taxi won't help...

  8. #8
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    Aussies and Yanks have a better tolerance of alcohol than Brits?

    Not in my experience.

    The rest is pretty good though.

  9. #9
    Philippine Expat Davis Knowlton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BaitongBoy View Post
    ^How can you be outta ammo, DK?...

    Wrong caliber.............

  10. #10
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    yortyiam's Avatar
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    Fairly accurate observation there FarangRed. As a Brit in Ireland I alwys make sure I'm out the pubs if England give the Irish a turning over in the sports.

  11. #11
    Thailand Expat

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    ^^Is it the M16s that have green tracers, or the AK47s?...I forget...

  12. #12
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    harrybarracuda's Avatar
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    Ironic that at the time I read this thread:

    Drunks from Around the World
    Walkin around bollock naked

    Couldn't tell if it was one thread or two.


  13. #13
    Thailand Expat
    r1 pet's Avatar
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    a good observation red, in my home town when the stag turned out at closing, to see irish guys punching the pub wall

  14. #14
    FarangRed
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    Dont foget the photo's with your stories makes it a much better thread

  15. #15
    Philippine Expat Davis Knowlton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BaitongBoy View Post
    ^^Is it the M16s that have green tracers, or the AK47s?...I forget...
    AK. M16 is red.

  16. #16
    Thailand Expat

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    ^Cheers...

  17. #17
    Not an expat
    Fabian's Avatar
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    What's the obsession with WW2? That may have been valid 30 years ago.

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Davis Knowlton
    ^^Out of ammo. Quite good. Catch you once reloaded.
    I sent a red on your behalf.

  19. #19
    Philippine Expat Davis Knowlton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bettyboo View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Davis Knowlton
    ^^Out of ammo. Quite good. Catch you once reloaded.
    I sent a red on your behalf.
    Great. Now Red will get upset and we will never get to see the pictures of drunken, effete, snail sucking, Chardonnay sipping, scarf wearing surrender monkeys. Spoiler....

  20. #20
    Thailand Expat

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    Quote Originally Posted by Fabian
    What's the obsession with WW2?
    Try Vietnam...War is hell...but contact is a motherfcker...

  21. #21
    Can I still change this?
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    Thais

    Alcohol tolerance: Very low. 4 soda whiskeys (note I did not say whiskey sodas because it's so weak) and they start the "touching your arm and rubbing your leg whilst talking/spitting on you game".
    Don't talk about: Thailand.
    Do talk about: Thailand.
    Who they hate: Anyone not from Thailand.
    Who they love: Thailand.
    Extra Notes: When passing a group of male Thais that shout "Hey hey you farang. Whiskey Thai, whiskey Thai" or "Hey, hey you farang 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4 hello, hello. Give them a big smile and thumbs up, but keep on walking.

    Black diamonds? I shit 'em.

  22. #22
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
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    What about the Scots?

    Tolerance to alcohol: Difficult to tell when they're always drunk anyway, and their speech is no help in gauging tolerance - impossible to understand pissed or sober.

    Don't talk about anything, just drink.
    Do listen a lot and nod.
    Tend to get very passionate about something just before they biff you and show you their bottoms.


  23. #23
    Thailand Expat

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    Some men are longer than others...

  24. #24
    Banned

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    To sum the listings up: LOSERS.

    The lot of 'em.

  25. #25
    I am in Jail

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    People from Ipswich

    Tolerance to alcohol: High, due to the Danish invasion

    Don't talk to them about: Norwich City FC, Hagar, or online photsharing

    Do talk about: Tractors, Continental beers, Manbags and velcro trouser retailers




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