Thread: Johnny's Easy Grilled Fish

There is not much happening on the farm this time of year, and the Longprongs needed to put some space between each other, so I slipped quietly into the Land of Oz for some fishing with my mates.

At Uthai Thani the girls do the creative cooking, but when I am solo, I cook to survive. I’ll show you one way to prepare your fish, how to cook it quickly, easily and without all the arty farty sauces, garnishes and bloody chilli. Oh, by the way, if you haven’t already got one, rush out and buy a convection microwave. These things are the lazy cook’s best friend and you’ll need one for this recipe.

Just up the road is a fishing spot called “The Hole in the Wall”. You drive up the beach until you see the V appear on the left of that island. My mate Gary is already on station waiting for a big one.
Gary, a famous Australian novelist, was madly working on his next book, but when I said “fishing” he couldn’t get ready quick enough. He reckons I’ve got a part in the book as a serial killer who knocks his victims off with his poisoned Mango chutney. So he justifies today as “research”.

This is how I rig for Bream, 6kg line, ball sinker, swivel and a short leader to a 2/0 suicide hook. You may recognise the cooked Vannamie prawn I am using, it comes from Thailand. We use these, because if the fish aren’t biting, we can eat the bait.

Bloody hell!! It is a magic rod. First cast and I caught this fine Bream. Those thongs are size 11, so I guess you would call that a size 15 fish.

Now for the messy bit - preparing your fish.
I don’t want to bore you here, but I will go into some detail for the inexperienced fish killer.

First, get yourself 2 knives. I use a butter knife for scaling and a serrated sharp knife for gutting the fish. The theory here is, you will not cut yourself as often when scaling with a blunt knife, and a blunt knife slides more easily across the fish when scaling.
Scale your fish, making sure not to leave any. There is nothing worse than having to spit scales.

Now, stick the serrated knife into the fish’s bum. You may have some preconceptions about the tightness of a fish’s bum, but it will easily accommodate a pointy knife.

With a shallow action, rip the knife up towards the head. For those who weren’t told by their mothers, always cut away from yourself.
Put your hand into the fish and pull out the gills and all other organs. Check that they are nice and red, and there is no sign of disease. If they look bad or smell like a Bangkok sewer, chuck the fish away. Wash out the gut cavity.

Decisions, decisions, will I have the big one or the small one?

Gather the ingredients.
Fish
Grilling rack
Oil for rack
Lemon
Limes
Cracked pepper
Salt
Too easy.

“score” the fish on both sides.

Place on oiled rack and rub pepper, salt and lemon inside and out.

Whack in microwave and press buttons.
Sit back with something cold.

Eat your fish.
Yes, that’s right, just fish. Why spoil something so good with unnecessary diversions.

Looking good mate. More coming I hope.

Are you going to grill the other one, since you broiled that one and already ate it??

Originally Posted by blackgang

Are you going to grill the other one, since you broiled that one and already ate it??

You must have one of those old fashioned microwaves BG. This fella preheats up to about 270c for fish, and then zaps it with RF whilst cooking. In the strictest sense of the word it isn't "grilled" but so bloody close it doesn't matter. Simply press the grilled fish button and stand back.

I've had a Big Mac & fries tonight, bought from the worst McD's in the world.

Looking at your pics on the beach, I conclude - my life sucks.

Nope, got one of them new fukers with the fans and dual units.
Mainly pulling your chain.

Eh Johhny,

My box ain't got no grilled fish button so how many minutes on high mate. ?

Be careful of the Aussie lingo as most of these drongo's ain't got a friggin clue wot we are on about.

Originally Posted by terry57

Eh Johhny,

My box ain't got no grilled fish button so how many minutes on high mate. ?

Be careful of the Aussie lingo as most of these drongo's ain't got a friggin clue wot we are on about.

Buggered if I know Teza. I am a bit of a waterburner really, and a bush cook at best. That's why I embrace technology, and let the oven do the thinking. I need as much artificial intelligence as I can get.

Originally Posted by Lily

Which beach is that and what island?

It looks like right at the very end of Hawks Nest beach.

Pretty close Lil. The island is Broughton Island. The shot was taken at the "Hole in the Wall" near Mungo Brush. 32 32 38.39S, 152 18 53.47E