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  1. #1
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    Top's Big Cook Off

    Top's Fool Proof Chili (My wife can do it so....)

    My wife's dad died (no need for condolences) a couple of days so she's flying to Bangkok on the morrow. As I spend a good chunk of my time teaching or generally fooking off, I decided to prepare a few meals that I can freeze and microwave.

    Today's effort was chili. A big double batch...

    1 kg ground beef
    2 packets of seasoning (yes, I do use the seasoning packets, don't hate me)
    2 cans of crushed tomatoes
    1 can of beans
    2 cans of water, using the bean can
    2 medium onions, medium chop
    1 head of garlic, medium minced

    Brown the meat and drain the pint of grease.

    Pro tip, after draining the grease, then add your first pack of seasoning directly to the meat. Keep on browning for another few minutes until a fount develops on the bottom. Add the onion and garlic, the water in the onions will help to start deglaze the pot.

    Once the onions are translucent, add the cans of the crushed tomatos and stir the pot to finish removing the sticky bits on the bottom of your pot, then add the beans and a couple of cans of water.

    After about an hour of simmering you should be here...and it's time to add the secret ingredient...

    Top's Big Cook Off-20230609_151448-jpg


    Yes, that's right, the evil garlic chili oil....it adds a wonderful depth of flavor to a bog standard (to use a Brit expression) recipe.

    More to come..tomorrow will be spaghetti sauce along with a couple of containers of fridge ready meals.

    Try to contain your excitement!
    "I was a good student. I comprehend very well, OK, better than I think almost anybody," - President Trump comparing his legal knowledge to a Federal judge.

  2. #2
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    david44's Avatar
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    As an English maestro when did the term cook off replace cook, I never heard it when I lived in Florida?
    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post
    bog standard (to use a Brit expression)
    What Is the Origin of the Saying "Bog Standard"?

    Bog standard means normal or run of the mill.

    The children's toy set Meccano came in two standards: Box Standard and Box Deluxe. Box Standard was the basic model and is believed to be the derivation of the term bog standard, which means average.

    Box Deluxe, on the other hand, was used by the workers in the Meccano factory to mean posh or high quality. Over time, Box Deluxe changed to Dog's Bollocks as workers swapped the initial letters of the words. It spread quickly. Other versions, such as the mutts nuts and the dog's danglies, emerged soon afterwards.

    Example Topper's cooking it's the bollox, bon appetit
    Quote Originally Posted by Latindancer View Post
    I just want the chance to use a bigger porridge bowl.

  3. #3
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    ^ a cook off usually means a contest

    Maybe I've been away from the states for too long...I'm not sure what the term is for cooking up a ton of basically basic stuff.

  4. #4
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    I do cumin seeds and oregano with the garlic and onions at the start (very slowly). It releases the oils from the oregano.

    Then add the meat and seasoning.

    I must love me kidney beans coz do 2 cans of them and 2 cans of tomatoes for 500 grams of meat.

    Slow cooked for around 8 hours.

    Add a piece of dark chocolate at the end.

  5. #5
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    ^ that's a lot of beans...

  6. #6
    Making people dance. :-)
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    It does get a bit gusty in the wee hours.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Edmond View Post
    Slow cooked for around 8 hours.
    The only thing I've done for eight hours is a 3 holer..

    To be honest, growing up, chili with either a ton of beans or with rice as a "filler" was quite common. I like them both.

    two and a half hours in...still a puddle of water in the middle, but things are getting close....tonight's filler will probably be rice but I'll use skyflakes while the wife is away, I've never learned how to use the rice cooker. No kidding.

    Top's Big Cook Off-20230609_161855-jpg

  8. #8
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    I'm relieved to see this thread is about cooking. I just jumped here from Mendip's thread and thought maybe the title was a typo.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post
    Yes, that's right, the evil garlic chili oil
    Imported from California, gotta love it.

    Looking good so far, Tops!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post
    ^ a cook off usually means a contest

    Maybe I've been away from the states for too long...I'm not sure what the term is for cooking up a ton of basically basic stuff.
    In angeles city and olongapo expats and us servicemen would regularly hold chilli cook offs in bars . It was pretty popular and where i first heard the term cook off.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by BLD View Post
    It was pretty popular and where i first heard the term cook off.
    And probably a poor thread title

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    At the time i remember thinking,hmm this is a pretty strange thing for folk to be doing in girly bars called . Titty twister , smut hut , etc. but it was pretty harmless fun. I often wondered if the girls thought it unusual behaviour or did it inspire them to have Adobo or pancit cook offs?

  13. #13
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    There was a big inasal cook off here last week... Mang Inasal was the winner.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BLD View Post
    In angeles city and olongapo expats and us servicemen would regularly hold chilli cook offs in bars .
    Chili cook offs are a big thing on an American military base and usually would have a big BBQ to go along with it. Guys would get really into it, trying to outdo each other to win. One thing you could count on is the BBQ/smoker was made on base out of a 55 gallon oil drum taken from the motor pool.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post
    ^ a cook off usually means a contest

    Maybe I've been away from the states for too long...I'm not sure what the term is for cooking up a ton of basically basic stuff.
    Batch cooking

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    Job complete, notice it's about half of where we started...

    Top's Big Cook Off-348370865_265180882845672_538077952191485424_n-jpg

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    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post
    Job complete, notice it's about half of where we started...
    Cooked down nicely.

  18. #18
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    One of the things that makes doing stuff like a giant pot of chili is having the right kitchen tools. For me a regular stainless steel pot just doesn't work on dishes like this, it has to be a cast iron dutch oven. The one I'm using here is obviously an enamel lined one, it works a treat, but a 5 quarts, it's a touch large for anything other than big batches.

    I want to get a 3 qt dutch oven for everyday use, but the fookers are dear....easily over $200. It's almost like the smaller sizes cost more.

    My other essential kitchen tool for this is my 8" Zwellinger (sp) knife, it's a nice, thin chef's knife that keeps a razor sharp edge. It easily goes through a half of onion with only wrist motion, no pushing down involved.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post
    I want to get a 3 qt dutch oven for everyday use, but the fookers are dear....easily over $200.
    I am seeing them on amazon for around $50-60 bucks, are you looking in the right place?

    https://www.amazon.com/s?k=dutch+ove...f=nb_sb_noss_1

    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post
    Zwellinger (sp) knife
    Pretty sure you mean Zwilling?

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by bsnub View Post
    Chili cook offs are a big thing on an American military base and usually would have a big BBQ to go along with it. Guys would get really into it, trying to outdo each other to win. One thing you could count on is the BBQ/smoker was made on base out of a 55 gallon oil drum taken from the motor pool.
    Indeed,we took it one step further with the help of roy the asshole from arkansas that we met at a cook of , roy wasnt even in the military but his american wife was , ole roy knew a thing or 2 about smokehouses and we promptly built one in bigbirds back yard out of cinderblock , i enjoyed it but i wasnt there all year long i had to fuck of occassionally to earn some more fun vouchers but bigbird was there all year round and certainly had it perfected after a while,

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by BLD View Post
    roy the asshole from arkansas
    Most from Arkansas are slobbering trumpanzees. So ya, that makes sense.

    Quote Originally Posted by BLD View Post
    ole roy knew a thing or 2 about smokehouses and we promptly built one in bigbirds back yard out of cinderblock
    That is one thing that they do well. BBQ.

  22. #22
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    Hadnt thought about those days for years funny how a thread on chilli cook offs can trigger memories,

  23. #23
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    @topper - Skyflakes! I'm happy that you have/ eat Skyflakes crackers. You've now integrated in PH society! (Skyflakes is a brand of plain, white crackers. You can eat it plain or with jam, tuna, sardines, chili, etc. It's been around since forever here in PH. There are many copycats: Magic Flakes, etc but the original is still the best.)

    Packets of seasoning - is it Magic Sarap? Those small packets?

    Btw, red onions are now P160/ kg in my hood - it was P100 last April. You should stock up on onions if you don't want to buy them at P600/ kg at year's end.

    Condolence to your wife's family. RIP to Mrs Topper's dad. It's good that you guys were able to visit him/ them a few months ago.

  24. #24
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    Ha ha. Fuck yeah you havent integrated until you eat skyflakes with everything , got a big tin of them and i just top it up when its running low with the smaller packets. All available here. Perfect for dipping in a chilli. Or some bagoong, anything really. Sorry to here the onion crisis goes on

  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by bsnub View Post
    Pretty sure you mean Zwilling?
    yep unless it's a knock off

    That's a fine pot, I always used similar Le Creuset stoneware in Europe but they are dear and impossible to find locally , last time was in C Mai looking at 6k up which the head chef thought excessive

    A fine a tasty looking dinner Topper eating the US way as I'm sure the cowboys did with dried provisions, though that lovely sauce would go well with rice or NAAN breads too

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