Thread: FAO: The Wine Connoisseurs Out There...

... the fuck do I do now??

And I don't mean about the skewed pic. Dunno what's up with that shit either though.

Don't you keep corks of previous wines?

Here's what you do; decant it all out into a jug or drink it, fill the bottle up with Ribena and take it back to the shop and demand a replacement.

That sir is a plan so crazy it just might work!

Originally Posted by AntRobertson

the fuck do I do now?

...I suggest a manicure...

Originally Posted by CSFFan

I keep a scrapbook of them

...do you press autumn leaves as well?...

Another booze-themed thread.

Perhaps, a disturbing trend.

Originally Posted by tomcat

...I suggest a manicure...

Yes but after​ that... ?

Originally Posted by CSFFan

Drink it would be my advice, but there's ton's of things you can do with wine, rumor has it....

You could cut the plastic off the screw top so you can save it for future reference as to the quality of the wine. I keep a scrapbook of them.

Working on that first part now, hoping for inspiration on how to reseal it...

Originally Posted by HuangLao

Perhaps, a disturbing trend.

...or perhaps cocktail hour approacheth...

Buggered if I know what’s up with these pics either. They show up initially and then change orientation??

Or maybe this is just a really good wine. Maybe a good thing I can’t re-seal it.

Its a screw cap, just not separated properly. Look for the join between the cap and the neck bit, it should be weak enough to break off cleanly.

Plan b is to neck the lot. Problem solved.

You're not wrong but where it’s supposed to separate it’s welded solid and doesn’t have the usual break points. Pic isn’t the best so doesn’t show that.

Oh well plan B it is then!

B is finish the bottle I hope. I ran across a very nice bottle of wine like that in the states and did the exact same thing... It was Californian...

Just googled this.


https://www.smh.com.au/business/aust...28-gx0e3l.html

If you want to keep the wine...

(1) Put a plastic bag over the neck and wrap a rubber band around

or

(2) roll some newspaper up and insert


or...


(3) Enjoy and drink the bugger

Those are all good options so now you've gone and confused me.

Must say it's not a bad drop either.

'Robertson Winery Chapel Red' (the name's a pure coincidence). South African apparently. Mind you that recommendation needs to be read alongside the facts that: I'm defo no wine connoisseur; and I can't even open a fucking bottle properly.

I bought a bottle of cheap red wine, less than B300, to go with some steak. Imagine my surprise when the fucker was sealed with a cork and my new gaff didn’t include a corkscrew in the inventory!

No more parochial insularity among the resort neighbors anymore as next door came to the rescue.

Plan B is stop drinking wine ya big wooly woofter and get some decent beer.

Originally Posted by Plan B

Plan B is stop drinking wine ya big wooly woofter and get some decent beer.

Yet, real men will prefer distilled libation and spirits.

Shifters.

I'm not a wine connoisseur but I've started making the stuff.
Prefer a beer or something stronger myself.
Got some blackberry hooch fermenting at the moment, looking good.
Chittys cheese and wine night is on the horizon and you are all invited.
If you carn't make it then never mind, more for me.

However , I secretly need some volunteers to sample the test batches.
Might send some to Tex in the slammer.

^ considering earl is the piss drinker, you should start with him......?

Originally Posted by nidhogg

considering earl is the piss drinker, you should start with him

...and when you finish with the literal piss drinker, you can offer a sip to the figurative ones...

Originally Posted by Switch

I bought a bottle of cheap red wine, less than B300, to go with some steak. Imagine my surprise when the fucker was sealed with a cork and my new gaff didn’t include a corkscrew in the inventory!

No more parochial insularity among the resort neighbors anymore as next door came to the rescue.

The funny thing of it though, I actually do know how to open a corked bottle without an opener or corkscrew using only a jandal and a wall.

True story, Google it!

Originally Posted by Plan B

Plan B is stop drinking wine ya big wooly woofter and get some decent beer.

I was trying to be sophistik... sophisticcated...sophistikated... classy.