Thread: Original Limericks

The standard form of a limerick is a stanza of five lines, with the first, second and fifth rhyming with one another and having three feet of three syllables each; and the shorter third and fourth lines also rhyming with each other, but having only two feet of three syllables. The defining "foot" of a limerick's meter is usually the anapaest, (ta-ta-TUM), but catalexis (missing a weak syllable at the beginning of a line) and extra-syllable rhyme (which adds an extra unstressed syllable) can make limericks appear amphibrachic (ta-TUM-ta).
The first line traditionally introduces a person and a place, with the place appearing at the end of the first line and establishing the rhyme scheme for the second and fifth lines. In early limericks, the last line was often essentially a repeat of the first line, although this is no longer customary.
Within the genre, ordinary speech stress is often distorted in the first line, and may be regarded as a feature of the form: "There was a young man from the coast;" "There once was a girl from Detroit…" Legman takes this as a convention whereby prosody is violated simultaneously with propriety.[6] Exploitation of geographical names, especially exotic ones, is also common, and has been seen as invoking memories of geography lessons in order to subvert the decorum taught in the schoolroom; Legman finds that the exchange of limericks is almost exclusive to comparatively well-educated males, women figuring in limericks almost exclusively as "villains or victims". The most prized limericks incorporate a kind of twist, which may be revealed in the final line or lie in the way the rhymes are often intentionally tortured, or both. Many limericks show some form of internal rhyme, alliteration or assonance, or some element of word play.
Verses in limerick form are sometimes combined with a refrain to form a limerick song, a traditional humorous drinking song often with obscene verses.
A notable Limerick - which won an Irish 'Listowel Writers Week' prize in 1998 - exemplifies the structure:
Writing a Limerick's absurd,
Line one and line five rhyme in word,
And just as you've reckoned
They rhyme with the second;
The fourth line must rhyme with the third.

Limerick (poetry) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia)




There once was this girl - an Asian
Who fancied it with a Caucasian
Her friends said be bold
At least two thousand all told
She soon found her true vocation

A young man from Bangkok
Looked down at his cock
A farang girl nearby
Said my oh my oh my
That's far too small for a knock

On family life in los


There was a girl from Chiang Mai
Her brothers did yaba got high
They demanded she fucked
Or at least that she sucked
Or said the fuckwits you'll die

A paedo once went to Pnom Penh
Chasing kiddies locked in a den
He rather enjoyed the hunt
Friends just thought him a [at][at][at][at]
Now he's locked up in Klong Prem

There was a lady in soi Nana
She Did shows involving banana
The performances left NGOs bitter
She cared more for the fritter
Frying them later for dinna

There was a young Thai in Hua Hin
His cock was as thin as a pin
His girlfriend just smiled and said
You're still my favorite in bed
Can have big when farang checkbin

Duplicate post

Lostandfound used to like eating toast.
He said that he liked it the most.
Till one day he got fat
And said "buggar that"
From now on its a duplicate post.

The was a young girl from Lahore
Who was, so we hear, a real whore
She liked it inside her so much
Boys thought her an easy touch
Her fame meant she charged more

Thee is young men on TD
I bet you've all had VD
I have not
Coz I wear a sock
Bet your dirty cocks smell like rot

Originally Posted by rebbu

Thee is young men on TD
I bet you've all had VD
I have not
Coz I wear a sock
Bet your dirty cocks smell like rot

Line 5 should rhyme with line 1+2

Thee is young men on TD
I bet you've all had VD
I have not
No nasty cock rot
I never feel pain whan I pee

Fixed it....

Originally Posted by Lostandfound

Originally Posted by rebbu

Thee is young men on TD
I bet you've all had VD
I have not
Coz I wear a sock
Bet your dirty cocks smell like rot

Line 5 should rhyme with line 1+2

Thee is young men on TD
I bet you've all had VD
I have not
No nasty cock rot
I never feel pain whan I pee

Fixed it....

Thank you kind bard.

There was a young man In Bangkok
Who remarked to this lass you're a fat one
She relied, "on my soul, I'm not a girl
Flipped him over quite roughly
And gently rammed her cock up his hole.

Better?

Originally Posted by rebbu

Originally Posted by Lostandfound

Originally Posted by rebbu

Thee is young men on TD
I bet you've all had VD
I have not
Coz I wear a sock
Bet your dirty cocks smell like rot

Line 5 should rhyme with line 1+2

Thee is young men on TD
I bet you've all had VD
I have not
No nasty cock rot
I never feel pain whan I pee

Fixed it....

Thank you kind bard.

There was a young man In Bangkok
Who remarked to this lass you're a fat one
She relied, "on my soul, I'm not a girl
Flipped him over quite roughly
And gently rammed her cock up his hole.

Better?

10/10 for creativity (or sharing your reminiscences)

Sadly have to point out

line 1+2 rhyme with each other
line 3+4 rhyme "" ""
line 5 rhymes with line 1+2

There was a young man In Bangkok
Who remarked to this lass, you want cock?
She replied what a treat for a girl
Let's go for short time whirl
Her todger, erect, twas a shock

Originally Posted by Lostandfound

Originally Posted by rebbu

Originally Posted by Lostandfound

Originally Posted by rebbu

Thee is young men on TD
I bet you've all had VD
I have not
Coz I wear a sock
Bet your dirty cocks smell like rot

Line 5 should rhyme with line 1+2

Thee is young men on TD
I bet you've all had VD
I have not
No nasty cock rot
I never feel pain whan I pee

Fixed it....

Thank you kind bard.

There was a young man In Bangkok
Who remarked to this lass you're a fat one
She relied, "on my soul, I'm not a girl
Flipped him over quite roughly
And gently rammed her cock up his hole.

Better?

10/10 for creativity (or sharing your reminiscences)

Sadly have to point out

line 1+2 rhyme with each other
line 3+4 rhyme "" ""
line 5 rhymes with line 1+2

Ha, no bother. I couldn't really be bothered with the rules.
And yes I am that girl

There was an old man who was Lost
Couldn't find his hotel at no cost
He asked in a tuk-tuk
But the driver heard fuk-fuk
And clubbed him and gave him the toss

There was an old fart on Teakdoor
He'd married a pattaya whore
She took him to the cleaners
And other misdemeanours
Now he's a bar room bore