Thread: Thai women and voodoo.....

bld
You have mentioned a few times about sending your wife back to Laos but fear her care would be left to the Monks at the Wat.
I remember one time getting called to drive over to my SIL's house to take my niece's boyfriend to the Wat for the Monks to look after.
When I arrived there were 4 guys on top of him (the boyfriend) holding him down and he was jerking about like crazy.
In my unprofessional opinion he was suffering a fit so I asked the Thai's what had happened. My SIL speaks enough English for us to have a conversation.
Anyway she told me he had been standing by the open window and then the "spirits" flew in and took over his body and he started thrashing about on the floor.
So I go over to the window and there on the wall of my other SIL's adjacent house was a fluorescent tube light which was blinking on and off like then tend to do when the starter button is RS.
Anyway I have read that a light flashing like that can trigger fits in some people. Anyway my prognosis was duly poo-hooed and I took him to the Wat as requested mainly just to get the 4 bastards off him.

So it is my belief spirits play a big part in what the Thai's here believe and governs what they do rather than Buddhist teachings. So I would not be sending your missus back to Laos unaccompanied by yourself.
What people believe can have a very strong impact but I believe a little bit more in modern medicine.

Yeah the poor sods are not just pestered by monks - they’re afflicted by spirits.
My wife told me that there was a young boy spirit hanging around our place to protect us. ‘Nice’ I thought. ‘How sweet and cuddly’.
Then I researched the Kuman Thong. Then I was horrified. It’s devo.
It’s a died-in-the-womb male foetus removed from the uterus and dried. Sometimes with some added baby chin fat.
If there’s none handy they can be created if a suitable pregnant woman can be found.
Very lucky for the new owner but not so much for the previous one.

Kuman Thong - Wikipedia

^ A Thai woman who worked in my friend’s restaurant always had to go home and talk to her child before she made any decisions about work. One day my friend went to the woman’s house and asked where her child was. The woman showed her a dried aborted fetus on an alter. That’s who she talked to. My friend, who is also Thai, was absolutely gobsmacked.

Today i wanted to give her a wide berth but she called and sounded ok and asked for some tullys chilli mussels in a tub of vinegar, they are delicious, so i downdowned tools and headed for the shop she called again and said can you take me out for a couple of hours the nurse said its ok. This sounded suspicious so i called her ward and they said they told her repeatedly that its the doctors decision and wouldnt happen today. I went to visit her anyway and she smiling and seemed happy to see me. She told me i will get out of here soon and i want to go to Lao , all my family want me to come please let me go you and the kids come later. Shes still saying she will be a nun , i cant let go there. Her head will never be right she wont take the medicine. She thinks theres nothing wrong with her. I asked her if she remembered the day she had the garden hose in the house, she didnt want to talk about that except to say well look at it now, its better than before. The auntie and her mum definately dont think uts a good idea for her to go now

Originally Posted by Loy Toy

A very difficult situation that may need a life changing move to remedy.

My suggestion would be, and when she is stable, is to tell her you have decided to move the family back to Laos ASAP and see what her reaction is.

If her response is positive you know she could be play acting, and as a bizarre ploy, to go back home.

I have no idea about whether you are in a position to arrange this move but it seems other more conventional attempts to solve your problem is failing.

I really feel sorry for you and the boys but something has to be done.

Just now to test the water i told her fuck.it i want to sell this house and move us all back to to lao. Were both fucking miserable here she didnt like that idea at all. But still wants to be a monk asap.

A mate called and said that him,waen, noy and touk had a 3 way conversation . my buddy called me later. Said they talked for 3 hours . They are all of the opinion that she should get to lao asap and even agree with the temple thing. Its fucking confusing to know what to do. ?

Looks like you’ve started something.
Western view = she’s in serious care because her major chemical imbalance is causing inappropriate behaviour.
Eastern view = whatever they say it is at the time, and a temple retreat to centre her is indicated at present.
Who is right ? Will she be hosing houses in Lao ?
Is the best risk-controlling strategy staying here ?

Here is what im thinking, i will talk to her doctor ask when she will be allowed home once home she stays 4 or 5 days if shes ok then she goes to laos we follow in december. I think she will find a way to go regardless.

Originally Posted by BLD

Here is what im thinking, i will talk to her doctor ask when she will be allowed home once home she stays 4 or 5 days if shes ok then she goes to laos we follow in december. I think she will find a way to go regardless.

BLD
I am nothing but a TD poster with an uninformed opinion so make of what I say as you wish.
I think that letting her go to Laos without you would be a mistake as she would then be remote from any advice or help you could offer.
My way of handling it would be to tell her that she can't go to Laos until you can all go together as a family.
If this creates a problem in her mind then she might relapse which would confirm that she is still not OK.
If she is fine with that idea then you don't have a problem, at least not regarding the trip, you still need to make sure she is stable enough for the long run.
I personally liked the idea someone mentioned of trying to video her when she is "lost" and then showing her when she is stable and seeing her reaction.
She keeps saying there is no issue but somehow you need her to admit she has a problem and then she would be on the road to recovery.

Make a plan and then stick to it. This is what I did when my first wife was in ICU and when in the end she died I had a plan in my head that allowed me to get through the next year at which stage I was a little better able to cope.
My daughter was 2 years old at the time and I know how difficult it is the be a sole parent and work. In the end I had to give up the work and didn't go back for nearly 4 years.

Once again good luck and I hope your wife gets better quickly for everyone's sake.

Originally Posted by ootai

a) the idea someone mentioned of trying to video her when she is "lost" and then showing her when she is stable and seeing her reaction.
b) hope your wife gets better quickly for everyone's sake.

Ootai, regarding a) ^ - you’re thinking like a sane man. May not work. In my experience even sane women have a capacity to deny reality. But if it works then it was worth trying.
Regarding b) ^ - yes there’s many who are hoping you have a few wins really soon BLD.

Fuck its a wild and confusing ride i feel like im going round and round in circles,3 days ago she was still adament that she MUST get to lao and sign on with a temple. 3 of her friends and 1 farang called her and she spoke coherently and explained that theres an indian ghost fucking with her head. Hence why she keeps changing clothes from pink to blue to trick the ghosts, these people thought this was quite reasonable explanationnfor all the nutty behavior and nearly had me convinvinced to stick her on a plane asap.

Even the mum and aunty agreed, but when i snapped out if it i explained to all of them im not sending her until shes right in the head. They thought this was unreasonable most of them have since come around and admitted they mean well but dont know there arse from a hole in the ground

For the last 3 days ive been visiting her but not taking her out, i cant deal with the nonsense , shes been great the last few days and the doc thinks its the change of medicine. Im taking her home for 2 nights tomorrow wish me well. ) she said the other day she now wants to stay here until december and go with us . Her friends cant believe shes changed her mind from 1 day speaking to them to the next, well guess what folks thats mental illness for you. Im not sending her without us in december, its just to risky anything could go wrong

Ive hidden her passport to.

‘ they mean well but dont know there arse from a hole in the ground’ - that’s people in general.

‘shes changed her mind from 1 day speaking to them to the next’ - this is normal woman behaviour.

I think the auntie spoke to the mil and have come to the conclusion that its better left to the western medicine not a bunch of superstition and well meaning. She said herself yesterday i stay with family until december i hope she sticks to that? The problem with all this is until she recognises theres a problem the problem will continue. I asked her if she had a recollection of the day she trashed the house? She didnt want to talk about it but pointed out hey . The house looks great now. Yes it does but its been thousands of un nessacsry expense. You cant reason with a mentally ill person.

There seems no end to it. Hopefully we will get through the weekend in a positive way.

All those friends who initially showed concern have slipped of the radar. There morbid curiosity now satisfied they dont even pick up the phone, they dont want to know. Its in the to hard basket 1 or 2 have but most stopped about a month ago.

Recognising and discussing the house hosing incident would mean losing face.
So that’s not gunna happen.
The culture is magnificent at not facing facts.

Yes for sure. It was like oh thats the past look the future

She has been calling my oldest boy lately and when i ask him how she seems he says seems ok , reasonable , just asking are you eating ok etc yesterday she even said to me thank you. Your a good father. But we will see if shes ok on the weekend

Be prepared for more position-changing.
What was definite one day will be unconfirmed on another day.
Make a plan to follow, and follow the plan.
Someone has to be consistent and that someone is you.
Yeah, does your head in - but that’s what you‘ve signed up for.

BLD
Stay strong mate. I tell my friends back there in Perth (yes I'm from there) that I have 2 problems with my wife
1. She's a woman
2. She's Thai