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  1. Replies
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    Clickbait - I mean who in the name of Netflix's...

    Clickbait - I mean who in the name of Netflix's left nut commissioned this gargantuan pile of dog shit?

    It. is. TERRIBLE.
  2. This is a game changer, Dirk. The Kickr is...

    This is a game changer, Dirk. The Kickr is probably the best trainer of the three (I managed to get my Atom for free otherwise I'd have chosen a Tacx or a Wahoo). Have you got a half reasonable bike?...
  3. just about to fuck everything up with a large...

    just about to fuck everything up with a large kebab and chips. and wine. and beer.

    Been textbook up to now - 45 minutes of sweating like an Isaan farmer during a Lau Khao draught in the shed...
  4. Dry January and all that associated new year...

    Dry January and all that associated new year resolution shit has got to be the worst idea... in the world... ever... Part 1

    If there's ever a time when booze needs to be called upon it's in the...
  5. For devastatingly rapid results, this is tried...

    For devastatingly rapid results, this is tried and tested - not by me, but by fat diabetics who've managed to reverse it.

    https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/howto/guide/what-fast-800-diet

    800...
  6. Add 20kg to that and you're in the right ballpark.

    Add 20kg to that and you're in the right ballpark.
  7. I've also become a bit of a fat kunt - despite...

    I've also become a bit of a fat kunt - despite having run over 2000 miles last year and cycled over 5000 I put on circa 5kg. I mean, what the fuck else do these people (the gods of chiselled torsos)...
  8. Thread: Man Caves

    by somtamslap
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    That's a great job from scratch, mate. Nice one!...

    That's a great job from scratch, mate. Nice one!

    As soon as I've moved into a bigger house I'll copy you. But moving into a bigger house in the UK means saving up for several thousand years.
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    That is one serious commute. Thanks for taking us...

    That is one serious commute. Thanks for taking us along on the journey.
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    Sticky: That is very frustrating. How did you pop it, AO?

    That is very frustrating. How did you pop it, AO?
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    Made a quiche for the first time the other day -...

    Made a quiche for the first time the other day - fuck me, I think you'd really struggle to find an unhealthier savoury dish. That's why it's good to make stuff, I guess - it makes you realise the...
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    Sticky: Thread's quiet. Would've thought the Thai...

    Thread's quiet. Would've thought the Thai lockdown is the perfect opportunity to embark on a prolonged spell of savagery.
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    Watching The Killing and wondering what all the...

    Watching The Killing and wondering what all the fuss is about.

    The Afghan situation has also seen this find its way into my YouTube recommendations. Very interesting docu/film

    The Road To...
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    Godspeed to all those doing the hard yards out in...

    Godspeed to all those doing the hard yards out in Thailand - sounds very tough.
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    Sticky: They used it for Chris Froome's 80km solo...

    They used it for Chris Froome's 80km solo breakaway in the 2018 Giro d'Italia, which has got to go down as the most powerful ride in the history of the sport. Google it. The bloke is fucking fire.
    ...
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    Sticky: Got given an endurance nutrition product called...

    Got given an endurance nutrition product called SiS Beta Fuel. It's like speed. Took a gel before each of the last three climbs and span up them with nay fucking issues whatsoever. Ya fookin' dancer.
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    Sticky: 71755 Cycled the South Downs Way in a single...

    71755


    Cycled the South Downs Way in a single sitting on Saturday. 100 miles of grinding over chalk and limestone. I'm still rattling.
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    Sticky: Purging past sin. I have many, many miles to go...

    Purging past sin. I have many, many miles to go...
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    Sticky: A tropical 26°C here on Saturday. It wasn't...

    A tropical 26°C here on Saturday. It wasn't pretty.
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    Sticky: 34 mile jog on Saturday 70386

    34 mile jog on Saturday

    70386
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    I'm not, and I hope it works for you.

    I'm not, and I hope it works for you.
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    This is actually very true. In the blue zones...

    This is actually very true.

    In the blue zones (areas around the world where people live the longest) there's a marked difference in how long Cretan shepherds and farmers lived - although both...
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    Myself, daily. The entire populations of Spain...

    Myself, daily. The entire populations of Spain and Portugal also.
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    Poll: *beep* I had a big fat shot of AZ a couple of...

    *beep*

    I had a big fat shot of AZ a couple of weeks ago.

    Felt ropey for a few days, but I'm now micro-chipped and standing by to do Bozzer's bidding whenever activated.

    *beep*
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    Your work is getting better and better - terrific...

    Your work is getting better and better - terrific stuff, Nigel.

    I still have your little Isaan hut on the wall, a very nice reminder of my clodhopping days chestbeating in the jungle.
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    Sticky: I'm doing left buttock, right testicle, shins and...

    I'm doing left buttock, right testicle, shins and feet today. Exclusively working on one bollock can sometime be problematic, especially when the gym's busy, but it's amazing what can be achieved...
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    Sticky: Yeh FUCK cycling on the road in Thailand - simply...

    Yeh FUCK cycling on the road in Thailand - simply just a big FUCK THAT.

    Aren't there multiple custom built loops in BKK where you can pedal without the worrying of being ploughed into by a ten...
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    Sticky: It encourages your body to function using fat...

    It encourages your body to function using fat rather than glycogen which ultimately makes you a more efficient endurance athlete.



    :yup:
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    Sticky: The 40km x 5 for overall fitness, but it hugely...

    The 40km x 5 for overall fitness, but it hugely depends on what intensity you ride at for calorie burn. It's generally accepted that riding hard tempo/threshold for an hour burns 800 calories, while...
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    Sticky: Press ups are all that's really required for...

    Press ups are all that's really required for strength, unless you wanna look big, which looks a bit daft, but that's just my opinion.





    Not sure how that would work as part of a weekly...
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    Sticky: It's a good question. A very good question.

    It's a good question.

    A very good question.
  32. Replies
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    Sticky: Autumn's here, bike's in the shed and I have a...

    Autumn's here, bike's in the shed and I have a brand new pair of Hoka Speed Goat 4s on the shoe rack.

    Halfway through week two of a structured 50 mile race plan.
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    Ratched gets a double thumbs up from the Slap...

    Ratched gets a double thumbs up from the Slap Sofa.
  34. Upon being released from jail, Thai men will...

    Upon being released from jail, Thai men will generally do one of two things: 1. Join the local temple for a life of sweeping and sleeping, 2. Join the local bus service for a life of putting everyone...
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    Just finished all three seasons of The Fall, set...

    Just finished all three seasons of The Fall, set in Northern Ireland with Gillian Anderson as the lead. Very good indeed. It's on Netflix.
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    A quite amazing line of work, I know it's not...

    A quite amazing line of work, I know it's not without its hassle but people would pay for the experiences you've had/are having. I'm still struggling to get past the lack of booze though.
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    Just a quickie re the concept 2 (it's a bit of a...

    Just a quickie re the concept 2 (it's a bit of a game changer so worth mentioning, especially if you're a number cruncher): download an app called Erg Data, it will pair with the rower and record...
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    Poll: Only when some fucking prick drives like a kunt.

    Only when some fucking prick drives like a kunt.
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    That's a gallant first effort, Mendip - you've...

    That's a gallant first effort, Mendip - you've clearly some muscle memory from previous paddling, so you're on the right path.

    You'll probably want attempt the 2km efforts just once a week, while...
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    The rower has gotta be the best piece of cardio...

    The rower has gotta be the best piece of cardio apparatus in the gym. At the end of a successful 2km time trial your body should be so overun with lactic acid that you collapse next to the machine....
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    You've got a Concept 2 ergo rower on board?! ...

    You've got a Concept 2 ergo rower on board?!

    All your problems are solved. You are hereby tasked to train for (Google will help you with this) and row the fastest 2km you can muster. It's a great...
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    Thanks for the continued updates, Mendip, a real...

    Thanks for the continued updates, Mendip, a real education for a landlubber like myself.

    How long will you be at sea?

    The lack of a frosty lager or two of an evening is the standout negative...
  43. Thread: On my bike

    by somtamslap
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    50,061

    Nice one mate - just how locked down is...

    Nice one mate - just how locked down is Manchester? Looks empty.
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    Sticky: Most of the damage had already been done by...

    Most of the damage had already been done by mid-March, at which stage people were still largely ignorant about the effects of the virus and how rapidly it spread. The climate obviously has quite a...
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    Sticky: 28 mile run from Petersfield to Amberley along...

    28 mile run from Petersfield to Amberley along the South Downs Way. 3,450ft of vertical ascent, 24 degree heat and only two water taps - one in Cocking, the other in Amberley - to keep me hydrated....
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    Sticky: I've got to say that Brits, for the most part,...

    I've got to say that Brits, for the most part, seem to be stepping up and adhering to the rules - even the chavs, in between setting fire to park benches and nitrous oxide hits, are playing the game....
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    Sticky: For the mile? I had an EKG done in 2017 and...

    For the mile?

    I had an EKG done in 2017 and was told that I might have long QT syndrome. Google it.


    IT SHIT ME UP

    Spent a year or so waiting for various cardiologists to analyse my ticker...
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    Sticky: ^ From what I've seen, all organised races in...

    ^ From what I've seen, all organised races in Thailand start in the middle of the fucking night - so no excuses, Eddie. Under two hours should be doable, think that's about 9:20 minute miling.
    ...
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    Sticky: Only half a dozen or so, none of them sanctioned...

    Only half a dozen or so, none of them sanctioned - as in, not organised events. I have done an Ultra marathon (60km) that was organised and am hoping to do a couple more in the autumn - although...
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    Sticky: I was going slow so was able to keep a decent...

    I was going slow so was able to keep a decent technique and avoid injury, fell over quite a few times though, on 35% downhills - managing to preempt impact now and go limp. Don't feel burnt out, I...
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