Some help with some Thai language

How would you say this in Thai?


You're a skanky hag and you can't sing worth a shit.

You're well past your sell by date.

Those shorts you're wearing emphasise you grapefruit skinned thighs to perfection.

Your husband is a fool. He cannot play keyboards. He just can't.

Your sound system is archaic.

The only musician in your little ensemble is the drum machine.

The base of which scares my dog, shakes the foundations of my house and makes me air sick.

Whatever the idiot wife of the aged Japanese gentleman is paying you for your performance is 100% too much.

Fuck off.


Any loose translation will suffice.

Just keep to the general theme of the message.

Many thanks.

This bass, is it heading towards the fabled "Brown Note"?

I understand the situation.

Usually there is a lot of alcohol.

Drink as much as you can.

Then throw up on the host shoes.

He (she) will get the point.

There's no need to translate that, what you said at the end is enough, Fuck Off that will do

Not even invited Pero.

The bastards are about 300 meters behind us. Invitation only. Nobody on our street got invited.

I daren't get pissed cos I'll end up gatecrashing.

One positive is that Joy, the misses has said that when we have our house party, in about 60 years, there'll be none of this doof doof crap with warbling out of tune strupets. No sound system, no speakers, nothing.

Just a few old people plucking instruments and blowing things............


Cool.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by jandajoy

blowing things............

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awesome....but if i get invited....can we make em not so old please...

Sao waw you fokin noisy 'E dum dub phet' whore c*>t so took kon can bpai non n take khun Stevie Wonder wannabe with phom.

..if the 'ole mans there, make sure you've got a 9 millie shoved down the back of ya trousers..!

The management can take no responsibility for injuries caused from this information. (small print):mid:



:chitown:

Som nam na.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by jandajoy

I'll end up gatecrashing.

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Go ahead, crash. Be sure to wear a yellow shirt.

I've been in that position. It sucks. If I could have figured out how to do do it without killing myself I would have snipped the power lines. Any chance you can do that? Perhaps accidentally backing your truck up into a tree which would unfortunately fall across the wires... Best of luck.

Throw things. Start with rotten fruit.

Stealth vandalism..the only answer!
Good luck!

To be fair they knocked it on the head at midnight. Could have been worse.

Still wish they'd knocked the tone deaf warbler on the head with a 2 x 4.