I took my son swimming today, we used to go to this place a while back. It was never cheap, they charged 50baht for kids and 100 for adults. It is like some Chalet hotel, where guests rent rooms in old tobacco curing house for 4500 baht per night.
They have a swimming pool, it's not big but the water is clean.
However, near the Jacuzzi section they have a load of broken tiles, to which the scars on my feet bare testament.
The owner is some mad millionaire, he basically pays money to these staff to stand around all day with no customers.
The place is empty!
Normally we are the only two in the pool all day.
Recently the rules changed, I think he wanted to stop any Tom Dick or Somchai coming in, so instead of charging the 100/50 baht a go, you had to join a club, where you paid 500 Baht for kids and 1000 for adults, but you got 11 sessions for this, kind of a 10% discount and it seemed like an attempt to keep the filth from the door.
Previously, there would be a day that was ruined by a "SCUM RUSH" - where a family of about 30 people descended on the place, bringing their own home made Som Tam, and take over half the pool whilst paying only 50 Baht to let one of their vermin swim...this probably didn't go down too well with the 4.5K a night guests who liked a quiet swim without the Pappaya floating in the pool!
So, today we seemed to get both extremes of Thai Society, when I went their this morning, there were two lovely little kids, aged about 9, two girls, very polite, and quietly enjoying themselves.
Then there was the mother....and the grandmother, like two fucking HISO wanabees! they had originally set up camp next to the pool, they had taken over a complete table for four with their rubbish, so they then extended themselves to another table of 4 to put all their bags on, then they had taken over yet another table for 4 in the pavillion, to dump water bottles on.
When it seemed like it was time to go home, they took over yet another table to lay out their wet swimming gear, and lo and behold FATHER appeared, he had left the work to the women and went to sleep behind the toilets!
But now he was in full swing, busy on his mobile, ordering waiters around like they were dogs...Jesus what an important man.
The Noueveau Hiso brigade spent almost an hour berating and talking down to the staff as they ordered their 25 Baht Nestle Ice Creams...what a bunch, never has Napalm been better prescribed.
Then, after leaving all of their shit and garbage everywhere, they leave.
Can you believe it, it takes almost 1 hour for the fat [at][at][at][at] to do his pre flight check in his Toyota Yaris before they get take off clearance???
Can you imagine trying to hurry these people??? like in an emergency, no wonder there were loads burned alive in that night club..the fuckers simply are a bit slow.
Then after two hours of peace and quiet, the fqamily from HELL arrive, a small elephant of a girl and an undernourished baby buffalo. what a bunch of cunts!
The mother simply sat there all the time on a handphone while the kids fought screamed and battled like reptiles.
The midget boy was especially repulsive, at one point, he got out of the pool and walked near us, took a good snort and then hocked up enough phlegm to cover a pool table, and he spat it out all over the wood decking, fucking PIG!
His mother barely flinched, I only heard a mild scolding, (if it was my kid I would have kicked his ass all the way home) Sockaprock!
Then the animal family bought ice cream tubs, and sat and ate them in the pool despite the signs displayed everywhere that food and drink cannot be taken into the pool.
Then the little retard goes and drops his half eaten ice cream into the pool, and the mother semi reluctantly gets up to clean the fucking mess (By this time, me and my son are trying to decide if they are "SAT" or "Here"
Then, it starts, the little fucvking [at][at][at][at] that I would gladly roast alive, starts his fucking foul stupid fucking ignorant Thai mouth..."FARANG" FARANG...Hello Mr Farang, Farang Kee Nok...Farang Man Farang...on and on it goes for about half an hour, and the fucking idiot mother just sits and smiles, I am almost at the point of getting a hold of the [at][at][at][at], holding it in front of it' mother and asking her "IS THIS THE PRODUCT OF YOUR FUCKING IGNORANCE?"
Any way my son tells me too keep calm kind of thing, he understands what they are doing.
Anyway, later I pop off to the car to get my ciggarettes, and I can hear the little [at][at][at][at] talking like shit to my son, but the boy won't bite (I told him to just shut up and ignore the animal)
Time to leave, so we get changed and are on the way out, and this vile little [at][at][at][at] from hell makes one final comment, and I caught the last part of it being about farang being like shit again!
So I stops next to the BEAST MOTHER, and with a big smile, I ask her "EE KWAI KEE KOOUP?" She fucking nearly dropped her phone and could not even look at me, then I asked the little piece of shit floating it's pool of piss "Bak Bah Dee Ee Kwai"
It isn' often I use Thai, but it seemed to do the trick, my son understood perfectly, and pissed himself laughing all the way home!
I think he was quite pleased I didn't use the "HERE" or "SAT" as was going to but thought better of it...what disgusting ignorant fucking slaves...
My son told me later in the car that he wanted to "Wring Their fucking Necks!"
Could you imagine going swimming back home and being allowed to get away with shouting NIGGER NIGGER OR WAP WAP OR SPICK SPICK to people? these cunts need a lesson in respect and manners..fuck I would have toed him right up the arse given the chance!
