Worst Smells

It is amazing just how bad a bag of not-quite-fresh steamed rice can smell, I would say rice has a potantial stink factor of 10.

Asia, well I guess hot countries in general - are full of nasty niffs - the smell of the meat section at a market on a hot day can bring on a gag, pork when forgotton at the back of a fridge is sickening, eggs are renowned and a half empty carton of milk discovered in an abandoned building after a month or so has got to be one of the worst.

Try a diet of squid, eggs and cider for the ultimate poo smell or the vagaina of a western backpacker upon arrival in Siam Reap for another memorable bio-stink.

That's my contribution for today... I think somebody should also do a thread on 'Best Smells' in which I would have to include Tequilla, Lavender, new shoes and petrol among others.

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Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp

vagaina of a western backpacker upon arrival in Siam Reap for another memorable bio-stink.

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She probably said the same about your knob.

Dead bodies.

Green Beer and boiled pickled eggs cause a terrible smell when the gas is expelled thru the anus.:(

Dead sheep that you happen to stab with an old fence post when young and stupid.

Then throwing a large rock on said dead sheep and watching it's liquified internal organs spray out over best friend and next door neighbhour. Mix that in with his vomit and you have the worst smell ever.

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Originally Posted by dirtydog

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Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp

vagaina of a western backpacker upon arrival in Siam Reap for another memorable bio-stink.

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She probably said the same about your knob.

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All she said about my knob was that it was nice and un-circumcised.

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Originally Posted by Mr Squirrel

Dead sheep that you happen to stab with an old fence post when young and stupid.

Then throwing a large rock on said dead sheep and watching it's liquified internal organs spray out over best friend and next door neighbhour. Mix that in with his vomit and you have the worst smell ever.

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:)

simple

HOTEL CHAMP PATTAYA, stinks proper stinks!!!!!!

step outside and smell the drains and sewers for a relief from the stench

the pet shop in balestier road in the morning just before it opens- the dogs have been locked in there all night, the warmth of the day is just making everything that bit more funky, and a slight breeze is wafting the odour towards a badly hungover slimboyfat, who gags violently.

i dont mean that i am contributing to the bad smell, i am just experiencing it.

Tap-water from a tank with a decomposing rat in it is pretty bad, specially when you just found out why that morning coffee tasted rather offish.

sorry champ is bad but worse is

subs shit tanks after 3 months away then doing a tank entry, end up covered in shit and slipping everywhere.
almost a sweet smell, aweful

Open Durian in the hot sun...

^^ what do they keep the shit for?

is it released as a decoy when you are being hunted by a destroyer?

Dr PP's underpants :rofl:

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Originally Posted by Essex slapper

I met this pikey in Siam Reap, so we went off for a shag behind some bushes and he had the smallest smelliest knob I have ever seen, thank god he suffered from premature ejaculation, he didn't look very chinese but he was working at some funfair in China somewhere, he made me keep shouting, "Scampy is great" while he was doing me.

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Taken from thorn tree :)

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Originally Posted by slimboyfat

^^ what do they keep the shit for? is it released as a decoy when you are being hunted by a destroyer?

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we have to store it until we can pump it over board when no ones about (other subs) as they can here the shit tank pumps from 100 miles away

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Originally Posted by navydoubs1977

they can here the shit tank pumps from 100 miles away

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Does it contain all your farts as well then ?

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Originally Posted by Thetyim

Does it contain all your farts as well then ?

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if it contained mine they would hear it 1000 miles away

Could use the fart-pressure for sending morse codes in emergency. :)

pla ra

take a bottle of Ragu pr Prego sauce, use half and then close the container and let it sit out for a month then open it. if you are in the same room you will probably vomit.

Tofu left sitting out for a few days or a week in your fridge. There is a reason why they call it stinky dofu.

A decaying sheeps body, killed by fly strike- a common problem in Oz.
If you don't find the body within a few hours (or preferably put the poor beast out of it's misery first, fly strike is not a nice way to go) you are in for one bad experience. This happens in the hot months, so you can imagine the rate of decay.
Mixed with the smell of decaying flesh, is the absolutely repulsive smell from the fly blown area- the flies lay their eggs in the wooly fleece, the maggots feast on the underlying flesh. If you touch any of the fly blown area, which is easy to do 'cus some of it is under the fleece and not showing yet, the repulsive smell is on your hands for a couple of days. When you and your mate hoist the body on to the ute, the emission of putrescent intestinal gases adds further nausea to the moment. :aus:

Surely the worst thing I've had to do- much worse than jackhammering out broken sewerage pipes, which I did for a while for some extra travelling money.

I'd have to say babies nappies are pretty awful too.

One of my mates in the UK is a hazardous waste consultant. He has in the past managed landfill sites and overseen the storage of hazardous waste.

One hot summer in the UK several tonnes of chicken carcasses were delivered followed by several tonnes of sheep skins that had gone off.

He had the stench in his clothes and hair/body for weeks. It was an underlying pong that could be picked up as you walked past him.

fresh vomit ...

Butyric acid - a.k.a. butter acid. Easy to make, and stinks like hell.

Scamp

The rice smell is caused by bacteria that grows in the rice after it has been boiled and left.

According to the Daily Mail, it is potentially poisonous. (but they think everything is dangerous)

A wet dog that's dead is not very nice.

Incense has a far too overpowering smell in my opinion, one reason why I stay away from temples and shrines.

In NZ I was lucky enough to scaffold the inside of the Christchurch shit ponds. That was a splendid week and a half.

Best smell - my own farts, especially in bed when my missus's head is under the blankets.

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Originally Posted by MeMock

Dead bodies.

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I agree

An abattoir pongs a bit.

I used to think that rotting scallop guts was the very worst smell known to man,that's untill we used to bait a few cray pots with them.Scallops that have been left a while and start rotting underwater is no joke at all.makes even the hardest stomach gag. :puke: :puke: :puke:

I am impressed with the level of stench above my own contributions in the OP - esp the putrid sheep and the submarine cess tank.

I forgot to contribute two others, one is the smell of plaque, you know the smell you catch when flossing your teeth with a hangover - have to say that is pretty bad, the mouth apparently contains more bacteria than the anus.

In the Phillipines there is this sauce called Patis, and one whiff will make you gag. It is apparently a fish sauce but nowhere near as bad as the fish sauce I have smelled over here.

It smells more like a bottle of dirty, cloudy fermented sweat that has been collected from a rugby teams armpits, forehead and groin with a credit card and dripped into the bottle before being left to ferment on a radiator for 6 months.

The smell of blood is also very sickening.

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Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp

In the Phillipines there is this sauce called Patis, and one whiff will make you gag.

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Bollocks. It's very similar to the Thai fishsauce (Nam Pla) in smell and taste - yummy!

Viet Namese Nuock Mam[sp] sauce is as terrible as anything I have seen on a table, except on a morgue table..

Period blood/

Fucking stinks.

The 3 least forgettable smells in my life: A rubber factory A cling film factory A cheese warehouse

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Originally Posted by mrsquirrel

Period blood/

Fucking stinks.

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Just get the chick to suck it off, but don't forgot NOT to snog her afterwards. :)