A Pre Christmas Clean

The small boy has been a bit sickly of late, there is a lot of Toktor Shit and Jakim shit around the place at the minute, so I was a bit worried about the bacteria etc.

So, on the off chance, i decided to do a bit of a spring clean.

The obvious first target was the kitchen, the place where you prepare and cook food, Yes the same place that your wife may run a mop over the floor every year or so.

Anyway, i pulled out the cooker, and fuck me! If google Earth had a satellite over this place today, I would have been nuked!

fucking Saddam got hung for less bacteria than what was under our oven!

It appears that this cheap shit (4K Baht) Sanyo oven simply spews excess oil and the like out of some sort of drain at the back...fucking hell, Drop this lot on the Kurds and we'd be done for bacterial warfare!

It took a wallpaper scraper to cut the shit off the ground, there was even pieces of old bread that had become fossilized, there were some dinosuar bones too, along with a few bits of hairy sausage, that probably came from pre ice age...they are on their way to the Smithsonian.

And what makes matters worse, after flushing this shit down the floor drains that I "brilliantly designed" I have blocked everything, and have a rising tide of filth in the kitchen!

Never mind, i went out to buy some of that Caustic Soda...the "SodaFie", but the shop was closed. BUT, the shop next door was still open and I bought a bottle of Hom Thong instead, amazingly, the kitchen looks great tonight, sadly I expect this illusion to wear off in the morning! But thats another day!

To be honest, I really don't think i have done myself any favours, or scored any brownie points, nor do I suspect SEX is on the menu for a good few days...they really take it to heart when you let the old mouth fly! - They cannot seem to accept it is simply an outburst and it clears the air!

The wife fucked off at about 2PM, amid my foul cursing about the state of the kitchen - (It took me over an hour to pick up all the spanners and sockets and screwdrivers I left lying) but i think she feels a bit shy because of the mess, THE LAZY [at][at][at][at]!

so I took the lad to the Quacks tonight the funny thing is, he is fine Sat/Sun..it is only a school day he has stomach problems...funny that eh? (I used to eat soap when I was his age)

any way, the doctor, (Mr. Dolittle) reckons he has an "ABSET" or an "UPSET" or an "ABCET" either way, I have no idea what he is on about...and he SPEAKS "Very Good Ingrish" by all accounts, so we have the usual three bottles of shit, the orange bottle, the green bottle and the red bottle! and two bags of vitamin C, don't ever EVER knock the National Health in the UK!!!

I know, this should be a separate thread, but, anyone reading, don't go and waste your money on a movie called "HURT 2009" it's another pile of crap!

Fuck ! what is it here, is it me!

I just went to burn some rubbish outside, and now I have a housfull of fucking angry and I mean FUCKING ANGRY BEES, and, the fly spray is empty..it is amusing however watching the Thais trying to floor them with those chicken feather dusters...the bees will win! IDIOTS!

Anyone want to pop round to my place tonight...the place is fucking BUZZING! But you need to watch your step as they are buzzing all over the floor!

Could be worse.