All swell that ends Well

All swell that ends Well




Breakfast Monday a little hungover from a box of Chateau Montplonk, and a Camberwell carrot supper. This was nothing a dawn Absinthe and magic mushroom enema cannot wrangle, Weasel coffee I shit it.


Beep Beep Bloody beep


She who must be assuaged was promising to limit my privileges due to the third month of the intermittent buzz of the smoke detector low battery warning noise in the galley.


Safety Fist
After 3rd coffee prep frying pan and pancakes then Dig out the 3 step ladder under stacks of other unfinished projects in back of the garages found some old safety boots from the construction (making a family of frogs homeless) bit loose soxless.


Mounting excitement


Up the ladder to the roof the over Hob Extractor window offers alluring glimpses of Ms Lovely next door who often gives me a wiggle when Pol Sergeant Strictcrease is servicing his mere annoy.


Muffy and Fluffy


The Phone Rang and Muffy the dog jumped, tugging on the belt of my fluffy bath robe. The loose fitting robe slid off




My glasses slipped out of my pocket into the pancake mix one side and my colostomy bag detached and sploshed into her birthday trifle on the other.


The Robe fell the over excited yapping hound who leapt to lick the batter dribbling down the stove knocking the oil onto the hob,

As I fell onto the cat Muffy was busy setting the frying pan on fire, just as the TippyPorn the neighbour waved encouragingly signalling Husband's off to gf.


Alas fire detector was off but the acrid fumes led to her shouting I'm going shopping and reversing her car like a rocket down the drive.


Sadly as ever she failed to use neither the glass nor the electric rear view mirror as talking to mum on a phone larger than a paperback.

OTHER CHANNEL
At speed she flattened the emerging couple fatally lopping the cop Sergeant Strictcrease and his nice pong nong, smeared like KY jelly as wife's car bouncing almost tragically, semi arousingly, with a splish splosh into the crocodile infested Khlong where even the crack spelunkers on a 50 baht bonus could not find her remains, after lengthy 20m lunchbreak dabble.


NIL DESPERANDUM


As a glass half full type of guy it was a relief when Nong Bong next door now a widow finished me handle the erection, kitchen clean up, monks, cops, press and caterers.




A HAPPY ENDING


The funeral of our Partners and little flattened , battered and deep fried Muffy went swimmingly, The 'marinated' trifle was a big hit at the Pitti and to round it all off I got a Sergeant's pension with benefits, a green off Seeking A Slum for the first time. and a surprise gift of a prophylactic buttplug for me hole and some knob restoration ointment from Switch.


Oh Happy Day.....