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  1. #1
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    Mc Fly's Bar - Rawai Beach

    Hello gentlemen

    This is my first post here.

    To cut a very long story short - 4 years ago I met a Thai lady online whilst traveling to Thailand.
    I was always unsure about her past and felt she was trying to hide details from me. (had a bad feeling she could have worked in the sex industy) She always strongly denied it.
    I was 28 when we met and she was 23.

    When we first met she told me she worked at this pub for a week before I met her, before that she worked at Tesco Lotus.
    After that we went around Thailand together for 6 months, I met her family (in Isaan) and she has been to the UK with me 3 times 6 months each visit.

    Things are starting to get serious now with talks of marriage and her moving to the UK with me. But we are fighting quite a bit and I just need to know about her past and
    who she really is. Not saying I would dump her immeditaly if she was involved in the industy, it would just make some things make sense about her personality and allow me to make
    an informed decision about my future.

    I have very little knowledge of the bar scene/bar girl scene in Thailand, I walked up and down Bangla road a few times to see the specticle but didnt do anything as its not my thing.
    Never paid for sex or massages or anything like that.

    I hope some of you experinced Phuket guys could tell me about the bar she worked at and if it offered adult services, she had a room she stayed in which she said the she rented from the pub owner.

    The pub she worked at was Mc Fly's Bar in Rawai beach
    Google Maps

    I actually went their with her after a few months of dating, we went to chaing mai and returned to phuket. It wasnt obvious to me it did offer those kind of services and could have been a
    normal pub.

    Sorry If this is the wrong place to post this, thanks in advance for any info.

  2. #2
    Thailand Expat prawnograph's Avatar
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    Things are starting to get serious now with talks of marriage and her moving to the UK with me.
    But we are fighting quite a bit
    I thought the second part usually came later in a marriage, not before.

    Ignoring the did she/didn't she work in a bar, this 'fighting' is related to what?

    The TD relationship counseling service will be with you shortly for professional advice.

  3. #3
    Thailand Expat DrWilly's Avatar
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    if you are fighting a lot then perhaps getting married is not the smart thing to do.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by DrWilly View Post
    if you are fighting a lot then perhaps getting married is not the smart thing to do.
    I would change that to if you're fighting at all. Who would even think about getting locked in long-term via marriage with a partner they fight with? Do they think it'll make the problems or incompatibility or whatever else is causing the fights to magically disappear?

    As for doing a background check, I'm sure there's private investigation agencies in Phuket who can find out anything there is to be found out for a fee but I wouldn't be bothered doing this and would just walk away from any relationship that has fighting quite a bit in it.

  5. #5
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    Thanks for the replies. The fighting part was just to explain why I am reconsidering the relationship and looking for answers for things about her past to try clear some things up for me.

  6. #6
    Isle of discombobulation Joe 90's Avatar
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    The OP reminds me of this dating advert..

    Mc Fly's Bar - Rawai Beach-20230127_105026-jpg


  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joe 90 View Post
    The OP reminds me of this dating advert..

    Mc Fly's Bar - Rawai Beach-20230127_105026-jpg

    Ur a sad twat mate. Can tell you have had your heart broke a few times!

  8. #8
    Isle of discombobulation Joe 90's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jq8989 View Post
    Ur a sad twat mate. Can tell you have had your heart broke a few times!


    Could be worse , I could be looking to hire a private investigator to spy on my future wife who I argue with and want to know about her nefarious past

    Are you Smeg?

  9. #9
    last farang standing
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    Your story is hard to fathom. you say when you first "met" was that on line or in person. how long did you correspond on line? If you went to meet her and she supposedly just left her Tesco job for the bar, that sounds like one of the many lines bar girls spin to catch an unsuspecting wood duck. Regardless you and her should not be fighting unless you are constantly asking her if she was really a long time bar girl. After this amount of time it s more important how she treats you in word and deed. Whether she never asks for money or treats you like an ATM.
    If you are fighting now marriage is a one way ticket disaster. You will end up transferring your wealth to her and her family even if she stays around long enough to get PR in the UK before she finds a richer farang. Have you been paying for a sick relative who cant afford hospital. brothers motorcycle repair new stove for mother etc etc or have you been fighting over how much support you give or not give to her family?
    Your gut is telling you what your dick is trying to get you to ignore. Kick her to the kerb. Many on here have good relationships with Thai women but even many of them had to kick a few bad ones to the kerb before they found a good one. If you are in the UK and she is in Thailand cut her off from any money and stop answering any calls. There are far too many women around to put up with a bad one.

  10. #10
    Thailand Expat misskit's Avatar
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    I reckon if he was arguing with a Thai woman about whether she was in “the business” and she was not, she would have blown out by now. That is terribly offensive.

  11. #11
    Hangin' Around cyrille's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joe 90 View Post
    Could be worse , I could be looking to hire a private investigator to spy on my future wife who I argue with and want to know about her nefarious past
    Actually, maybe you shouldn’t have skipped that bit.

  12. #12
    last farang standing
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    Quote Originally Posted by misskit View Post
    I reckon if he was arguing with a Thai woman about whether she was in “the business” and she was not, she would have blown out by now. That is terribly offensive.
    Yes. I think for many thai women that woud be the end of the relationship.

  13. #13
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    I still can't get past the fighting a lot part, who would want to make a toxic relationship a permanent thing by getting married when they're in a easy position to just walk away now instead?

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by prawnograph View Post
    The TD relationship counseling service will be with you shortly for professional advice.




    Quote Originally Posted by jq8989 View Post
    The fighting part was just to explain why I am reconsidering the relationship and looking for answers for things about her past to try clear some things up for me.
    Basically you asked if she was a whore. Whether or not we like to admit it 'normal' Thais have a sense of morality just like most and being called (pretty much what it boiled down to) a whore in earnest is grounds for saying Sayonara - in Thai of course.

    The fact that she didn't and travelled to the UK with you several times as she'd never been past Bangkok should also make you think twice.

    Also:


    Quote Originally Posted by jq8989 View Post
    But we are fighting quite a bit and I just need to know about her past and who she really is.
    should sound the




    And so concludes the TD pictorially enhanced counselling clinic.

  15. #15
    Hangin' Around cyrille's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by panama hat View Post
    grounds for saying Sayonara - in Thai of course.
    :cringe:

  16. #16
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    This is just silly, you know what she is like, you know you are arguing, you know you pay the bills. Why the hell would you put up with that?

  17. #17
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    The fact that you find it necessary to seek advice from a bunch of ageing whoremongers on a decrepit and dying forum for raddled cynics speaks volumes about your naivety regarding women.

    After 4 years you either love her and enjoy her company, her conversation and her personality, and feel a definite and growing compatibility, or you dont.
    Her previous employment should be of no relevence.

    Perhaps you would be more comfortable and sure of yourself if you stuck to what i assume was your usual diet of blotchy skinned loudmouthed weatherspoon slappers

  18. #18
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    by the opening post the man is not a beer and bargirl tourist and is not used to meeting people who are scam artists in his normal life
    in Thailand you meet scam artist and con merchants all the time both Thai and expats in the main tourist areas daily if you go to them regularly
    There are plenty of honest trustworthy Thai people but you will not meet them in places like Patong that lovely thai woman you met could turn out to be a man
    if you want company in Thailand male or female its easy to get and not expensive just pay as you go until you are very sure you want a long term relationship with them
    its a mistake to get involved with someone who you regularly argue with

  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by misskit View Post
    That is terribly offensive.
    It is, and of course she can only deny it.
    It is also pointless. She was 23 years old. You won't find a 23 year old virgin in any Isan village near me. So she had had sex before they met. What actual difference could it have made if money had changed hands sometimes?
    More relevant is that she has found her meal ticket and will play whatever role she needs to keep it. Until she can walk away with the house in the village.
    We have a similar story playing out now in our village. The old Brit with a younger wife. She has secured the house and car, she is now pregnant with her Thai boyfriend's baby. The whole village knows, except the Brit.

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by cyrille View Post
    :cringe:
    The need was there to explain it specifically for you . . .


    Quote Originally Posted by Shutree View Post
    She has secured the house and car, she is now pregnant with her Thai boyfriend's baby. The whole village knows, except the Brit.
    He'll find out when the kid is born




    Quote Originally Posted by Shutree View Post
    So she had had sex before they met. What actual difference could it have made if money had changed hands sometimes?
    Maybe it isn't the money exchanging that bothers him

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by panama hat View Post
    He'll find out when the kid is born
    He will find out that she is pregnant quite soon, I saw her with her boyfriend the other day and she is beginning to swell. Maybe the Brit thinks it is his. She has ignored advice from other villagers to tell him, she says she is worried he'll stop giving her money.

  22. #22
    กงเกวียนกำเกวียน HuangLao's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hugh Cow View Post
    Your story is hard to fathom. you say when you first "met" was that on line or in person. how long did you correspond on line? If you went to meet her and she supposedly just left her Tesco job for the bar, that sounds like one of the many lines bar girls spin to catch an unsuspecting wood duck. Regardless you and her should not be fighting unless you are constantly asking her if she was really a long time bar girl. After this amount of time it s more important how she treats you in word and deed. Whether she never asks for money or treats you like an ATM.
    If you are fighting now marriage is a one way ticket disaster. You will end up transferring your wealth to her and her family even if she stays around long enough to get PR in the UK before she finds a richer farang. Have you been paying for a sick relative who cant afford hospital. brothers motorcycle repair new stove for mother etc etc or have you been fighting over how much support you give or not give to her family?
    Your gut is telling you what your dick is trying to get you to ignore. Kick her to the kerb. Many on here have good relationships with Thai women but even many of them had to kick a few bad ones to the kerb before they found a good one. If you are in the UK and she is in Thailand cut her off from any money and stop answering any calls. There are far too many women around to put up with a bad one.

    What should truly be confounding is that there are fukwits around such as the OP......going out of their way to create this uncomfortable life for themselves. Unable to see the forest for the trees.
    A nice little package of naivte', life experience vacancy and idiocy bundled together.

  23. #23
    Thailand Expat DrWilly's Avatar
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    Of course, all of the above comments only apply if the thread and poster are not trolling.

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by taxexile View Post

    After 4 years you either love her and enjoy her company, her conversation and her personality, and feel a definite and growing compatibility, or you dont.
    Her previous employment should be of no relevence.
    I agree with this to a certain extent, love or lust is the key and her history irrelevant.

    Quote Originally Posted by Shutree View Post
    It is also pointless. She was 23 years old. You won't find a 23 year old virgin in any Isan village near me. So she had had sex before they met. What actual difference could it have made if money had changed hands sometimes?
    We have a similar story playing out now in our village. The old Brit with a younger wife. She has secured the house and car, she is now pregnant with her Thai boyfriend's baby. The whole village knows, except the Brit.
    Love is blind!

    Quote Originally Posted by Shutree View Post
    He will find out that she is pregnant quite soon, I saw her with her boyfriend the other day and she is beginning to swell. Maybe the Brit thinks it is his. She has ignored advice from other villagers to tell him, she says she is worried he'll stop giving her money.
    Really I don't know what would make her think that. I reckon she would be a keeper as she can think.

  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by HuangLao View Post
    What should truly be confounding is that there are fukwits around such as the OP......going out of their way to create this uncomfortable life for themselves. Unable to see the forest for the trees.
    A nice little package of naivte', life experience vacancy and idiocy bundled together.
    Yet you, by your own admission, have had was it 5 or 6 wives in the past? Probably best for anyone that fucking stupid to stay right out of giving relationship advice or throwing shade on anyone who's only an amateur compared to them when it comes to being a life-long idiot incapable of learning from their own mistakes. Even a complete retard would surely figure out that marriage isn't for them after 2 or maybe 3 failures, at the most.

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