An Isaan Pond

[baldrick]

On that Chop Saw you will appreciate wearing

a face shield

same with the grinder if one of the cheap chines discs gets loaded up with metal and decides to disintergrate

[Steady]

It looks like he's already lost at least one toe and had his pinky reattached sideways to his club webbed foot

[Stumpy]

^



Ouch. Not even a foot is safe from the "Dillinator"

[David48atTD]

It looks like he's already lost at least one toe and had his pinky reattached sideways to his club webbed foot

I heard that Menny was a bit of a Lord of the Rings fan ... now we know why

[Mendip]

I see that rather focus on the finer points of jetty construction the conversation has veered towards my feet.

I'll admit that they're in pretty poor shape just now, what with the grey primer and Chaindrite spatter now joined by black enamel gloss spatter but there just aren't enough hours in the day right now to get to all those 'hard to reach' places when showering.



I'll admit that there ain't a lot of toe sucking going on in the Mendip household just now, but once this damn jetty is finished my intention is to have a good end of project clean up.

Hey Mendy. On that Chop Saw you will appreciate wearing safety glasses if one of the wheels let's go. I have had one go and shit flies everywhere. Same with shoes when welding, burning slag goes deep through skin quick..

Yeah JP... I wear eye protection but must admit I get a bit slack on some other stuff. I've lost count of the number of times I've had welding slag wedged between a couple of toes through wearing flip flops. That's not much fun.

But you can't make an omelette without breaking an egg!

Despite too much Leo last night I was up early today to allow enough time to get two coats of black enamel paint on the frame.

In between feeding her chicks the hoopoe mum spent a lot of time watching me work.



I think she's glad that the noisy welding and grinding phases are over and seems genuinely interested in the project.



Once the first coat was on I turned my attention to the wonky ended wooden planks. I was hoping that by the time the wood issues were rectified, the first coat on the frame would be dry enough to apply the second. It's all about coordination.

This was the typical scenario...



I also took this opportunity to standardise the length of all cut planks which varied a lot due to the variation in length of the original 5 metre planks. I had to reduce all lengths to the shortest one which was 167.5cm. This still meant I had got an extra 2.5cm of wood free with every 5m length... which can't be bad.

The main problem with all this is that now the jetty will lose it's intended 'rustic' look and tend towards the perfect. But I guess I'll have to live with that.

Some precise cutting was called for...



And after the last cut on the 21st plank... not too much waste.



Before moving on to the next task I had a rare moment of genius and solved a problem that has been bugging me for some time.



Why they don't sell it ready sliced I don't know.



I'm looking forward to tomorrow's breakfast already. I'm thinking of just a simple couple of fried eggs on toast with two or three slices of black pudding.



Tomorrow's breakfast sorted, I set up the planks to Chaindrite their newly cut ends for what seemed like the 15th time.



Then on went the second coat of black enamel to the frame...



... and the planks were all turned around to Chaindrite their other ends. Three coats on each end. What a system.

So, the state of play at the end of day 17... ish?



So long as the paint has dried and the weather holds... the lift to the pond for dimensional control with the offshore legs and onshore plinth is planned for tomorrow morning.

Will it fit?

The excitement is palpable.

[lom]

the lift to the pond for dimensional control with the offshore legs and onshore plinth is planned for tomorrow morning.

Did you leave a bit of metal unpainted for easier welding to the offshore legs and onshore plinth or is it 2 layer prime and 2 layer enamel there also?

[Mendip]

^ No I didn't.

I'll just have to scrape it off exactly where necessary.

It's a good system... but not perfect.

Oh... and 3 layer primer. This is quality.

[Saint Willy]

Hi hope that blade was clean before you cut the pudding!

[Stumpy]

Gotta love an outside guy. Nice job Mendy. I have cut up venison with a skill saw that was previously used to cut up fence planks of redwood...

[Mendip]

Hi hope that blade was clean before you cut the pudding!

I bet it was cleaner than Harry's fridge.

I'll fry it up anyway... that'll kill any germs.

[ootai]

Hi hope that blade was clean before you cut the pudding!

I bet it was cleaner than Harry's fridge.

I'll fry it up anyway... that'll kill any germs.

i think somewhere earlier someone wisely said "The right tool for the job"

BUT after reading this I think we have here a case of "The right fool for the job!"

Fuk me Mendy you have gone feral I am getting worried about you.
I bet next time you're offered ants eggs you will jump for joy and dive right in.

[David48atTD]

I also took this opportunity to standardise the length of all cut planks Some precise cutting was called for...


Before moving on to the next task I had a rare moment of genius and solved a problem that has been bugging me for some time.

I hope your 'rare moment of genius' included placing 4/5 planks of wood into the vice to be cut at once ... or were was there 21 individual cuts to the same length?

I'm just an 'efficiency' type of guy

[Mendip]

^ A stack of 3 was the most the vice could take... but yeah, way ahead of you!


I awoke this morning to a cool, overcast day with a gentle sou' westerly... in short, perfect conditions for a heavy lift.

I tested the fresh paint on the frame and it was dry... the lift was on!

The first task was clear any obstructions along the route and to reinforce the temporary offshore wooden walkway to 'farang' specifications.



The lift commenced at 10:51 sharp.

The dogs caused initial confusion because the dog walks always start from the gardener's garage and their hopes were falsely raised, but once they realised there was a major operation underway they settled down.



It didn't escape my notice that not only did I have the heavy end, I also had to walk backwards. I can't help feeling I was stitched up again.



The garage gate was in fact no problem at all to negotiate and we were soon out on the open pathway.



And then the first major route obstruction... the pinch point between the chicken run guttering and the waterfall.



There were literally millimetres to spare.



And then along the avenue. The entire route was curved which didn't help. I had to ditch my safety slippers at this point because they are just impossible to walk backwards in and I was in danger of a major trip, which could obviously have been catastrophic to the operation.



On the sala approach the route took us off the stone pathway and down the steep embankment towards the pond. Another tricky part and fraught with danger.



And then down the steps, across the concrete plinth and out onto the wooden walkway. Maya took it in her head to lead the way at this point which nearly ended in disaster.



The wooden walkway showed surprising flex with the weight of the metal frame and I started to regret using the rotten wood from the old jetty... but it held up... just. A failure at this point would have left the project in tatters.



And probably the most critical operation of the entire lift... to rotate the frame 90 degrees while supported by a rotten wooden walkway, over water. Anything could happen here... you just can't practice for this kind of thing.

[armstrong]

I'm on the edge of the toilet seat.

[Mendip]

The rotation went well, and following some necessary final readjustments we were ready for the most delicate part of the entire lift... lowering the frame into the L-piece supports. This was also the most unknown part of the operation... would it fit?



The final heave...



And in she slotted!!!



The fit was absolutely perfect... the frame slid into the L-pieces held in position by the protruding rebar. It was a tight fit, and once in was very difficult to move during final longitudinal position adjustments. It really couldn't have been better.

And I'm not dancing a jig of happiness here (although it would have been warranted)... it was quite difficult stepping over the frame without tripping.



And some final adjustments of the L-pieces to centralise them, and all ready for welding.



To be honest the welding is almost not necessary as the frame is so tightly wedged in the supports.

The port offshore leg...



The starboard offshore leg...



Concrete plinth, port side...



Concrete plinth, starboard side...



The L-pieces will hold the metal frame just clear of the concrete ensuring that it won't sit in standing water. A second concrete step will be poured shoreside of the frame and this will be topped with three more flat paving slabs. A small gap will be maintained between the metal frame and this step to again ensure that the metal won't sit against standing moisture.

And a few views of the frame, in situ. This gives a real idea of how the finished jetty will look.

Modelled by my lovely young daughter...



The 'bar' is a little high for my daughter to lean against in comfort... but two points here. 1), she will doubtless grow a bit more, and 2), it's my jetty so who cares.



This is probably the best thing I've ever made. I'm so happy a rare afternoon Ya Dong is definitely in order today.



The view from the sala.



And again... just look at that fit!



I finally had time for a practice lean. Yes, 118cm is the perfect height.



And this is my view from the end of the jetty. I envisage many happy hours soaking in this vista, Leo and Ya Dong perched next to me and surrounded by my pack of dogs.



And a practice 'two man lean'. Two can be done comfortably although I think it helps if you're close. I would feel a bit uneasy doing a 'three man lean', so sorry KW and Shutree, it'll have to be just one of you at a time.

[Saint Willy]

so sorry KW and Shutree, it'll have to be just one of you at a time.

I'm good with that.

[lom]

[Shutree]

I would feel a bit uneasy doing a 'three man lean', so sorry KW and Shutree, it'll have to be just one of you at a time.

This is no problem, I can retire to the sala bar and pour KW's single malt, then we can swap.

I must say the whole project has gone very well. I'd say it has gone swimmingly.

[Mendip]

^ Thank you. Praise from a fellow Teakdoor peer meams a lot!

[David48atTD]

Well Menny, the good news is that your toes are safe from being chewed by Termites

I'll start the crowdfunding to buy you a cake of soap and a scrubbing brush!

[David48atTD]

p.s. ... great job (thus far)

[Saint Willy]

One might even go as far to say a sterling job

[Stumpy]

Top stuff here Mendy. Can't wait to see you try and catch fish again.

[cyrille]

I envisage many happy hours soaking in this vista, Leo and Ya Dong

God bless all who sail in her!

[Stumpy]

Oh Yeah...and "Hats off to ya Mendy"