Your Thailand stories

[dirtydog]

Ok this is an old one from 2005 so involves Don Muang Airport rather than Suvarnabhumi Airport, so anyway, my mate makes his way to the Bangkok airport with his massive overstay, we all know it is 500baht per day and a maximum of 20,000baht, pretty easy to remember for the thickest of people, sadly Thai immigration don't make the grade on the thickest people.

So a quick run through of what happened, he gets to the airport and checks in then goes to pay his overstay, the Thai immigration officer spends a long time working out how many days it is due to there lack of mathmatic skills, I still remember my father applying for a 365 day visa, well it does fuking say how many days, the fuking idiot got the calendar out and was totally suprised it was a year, anyway back to the airport scum, th Thai immigration officer worked his fine out to like 60,000 odd baht, yet the maximum fine is 20,000baht, so he handed over the 20k baht like a good man that he is, he was quite shocked to hear from Thai immigration officials that they wanted more money, so being the nice chap that he is he told them to go fuck themselves, yep, Thailand and thais are great, only if your fucking them.

[Doggsy]

that is a great story. I don't get it though. I get the story. I just don't get the point of it.

[Rigger]

Yeh I got one over on the boss at the local race shop, I asked him how much for a set of flash chrome car mats, 1500 baht. Went back at lunch and asked one of the workers how much for the mats 1000 baht, ok I will take them.
you cant blame them for tring

[CharleyFarley]

should this belong in my story thread.......perhaps not.

[Don Juan]

Or they're fucking you!

[Boon Mee]

Two neighbors of mine bidding on the 2 met wall I'm building. One wants 1K per and the other thinks 650 baht per will do it. And the 650 baht guy does better work too. Guess who I'm going with?

[nedwalk]

the third quote?

[Chairman Mao]

Mate asked a chick working in MBK out for a date last weekend. She called him and said she had no money. He said not to worry, he'll pay for the drinks etc. She sent him a text message 10 mins later with her bank account details and request for 2000 baht.

Dumb slut. Made me laugh though. I woulda replied 20 mins later that I put 3000 in there coz she's so beautiful.

[Boon Mee]

the third quote?

I'm going with K. Ubon the guy at 650 per. He's got loads of experience working in BKK on high-rise bldgs. I've seen his work around my mooban and it's good. Also, he's already constructed a cement frame to support the 40' shipping container I brought over and it's as sound as anything I've ever seen. Goddamn termites had already gotten in and it wasn't sitting on the ground more than 3 weeks! Lost two boxes of books.

I'll post some pics later as the job progresses - got 5 rai to enclose with this wall so it's not going to be an overnight project.

[ferretface]

a good hedge would do the same job,and cheaper.

[rawlins]

Over the legal limit, stopped by the police for having no helmet on after trying to ignore the policeman and nearly running him over in the process...

Allowed to ride off with a ticket and 200 baht fine down at the cop shop the next day.

UK would have been night in the slammer, court appearance, hefty fine and loss of licence...

Is this the kind of story you are after?

[dirtydog]

Piss off rawlins I think your missing the point of the initial story because i explained it so badly, the Thai immigration official at Bangkok airport then told him that he had never heard of this 20,000 baht maximum fine, he had to pay the 60,000 odd baht, he didn't have it so the thai immigration official at the airport told him that he would have to go to jail then, he goes well fuk you to I got the 20k baht and here it is, thats all I got, the immigration official at Bangkok airport just said, "Your going to jail sunny boy unless you got 60 k baht", so basically he was held at gunpoint in Thailands international airport, luckily he didn't have the money and 10 minutes before boarding the plane finished they told him to fuck off, after accepting the 20 k baht of course.

[Fondles]

he was held at gunpoint in Thailands international airport,

[dirtydog]

Ok, I will do some better stories next year, hopefully next year I will spend some of the UK summer in England, aint stories I am willing to do here, stuff like falling through roofs as we break into buildings with the Thai police cos there to dumb on how to get in a building, breaking into police sealed buildings with police just to see if anything is left, and other fun stuff like that.

[rawlins]

^ Ohhhh... I think I get the gist of it now...

I maybe have a story or 3 but it wouldn't benefit anybody if told I reckon.

I'll try another 'feel good' one instead as I'm still feeling rosy about Thailand after reading Sabangs Isaan house thread...

Off to the local 7-11 with an 'up the duff' SBF on the back of the bike.... Policeman pulls us over due to us both having no helmets on and immediately starts writing out a ticket and saying "sorng kon... mai koy dee" followed by some tutting noises.... I correct him saying "mai chai.... sahm kon" while holding up 3 fingers with one hand and pointing out SBF's pregnant belly with the other...
Policeman confirms the fact with a grinning SBF then proceeds to rip up the ticket and telling us to be on our way....

[buriramboy]

Back in 2001 i was pissed out my head at about 3 or 4 in the morning driving back from Nana to Ratantibet, anyway got a flat and it was also the rainy season and pissing down with rain, so i'd sort of pulled over and must have fallen asleep as next thing i know there are 2 cops banging on the window, thought i'm in the shit now, but the cops changed my tyre in the bucketing down rain, then push started me as my battery had died and refused to accept the few thousand baht offered.