An evening at the quacks.

[withnallstoke]

For the last couple of months i've had a rash on my face, and it's been getting worse, so i decided on a trip to the docs to see if they could cure me before my face completely fell off.

This was my first visit to a Thai docs, so i wasn't sure what to expect. The surgery was the usual set up, opening at 5 o' clock after the doctor has finished his day job, and closing at 8 o' clock.

I arrived just before 7, gave my id to one of the three receptionists, and she gave me a cardboard ticket with the number 67 on it, and she explained the wait would be about half an hour.

I sat on a chair next to the receptionists desk, which served as a medicine dispensary to those already seen by the doc. A steady stream of punters parted with sums ranging from 240 baht up to 2,900 baht, interspersed with more people being given sequentially numbered tickets - 88 was the last one i saw issued before my turn came to see the doc, about 40 minutes after i arrived.

He spoke good English, diagnosed my condition as dermititus, and gave me my prescription to get from reception. 2 creams and 20 vitamin E tablets for 260 baht.

So, in 3 hours he saw about 100 people who each parted with say an average of 400 baht a piece, open 7 days a week, that's a tidy income of over a million a month from his part time job.

Can one obtain a doctors certificate from Kao San Road?

[beazalbob69]

Can one obtain a doctors certificate from Kao San Road?

Why? Do you need one to practice in thailand? Just pretend to be a doctor, should be good enough.

[Bangyai]

I've learnt my lesson with ' clinics '. Far better to go to a hospital and seek out the relevant specialist department. Docters in their evening clinics are often either too tired or stressed from a days work elsewhere to give proper attention to what they are doing.

For a rash on the face a cessation of muff diving for a fortnight often helps.

[Boon Mee]

[quote=Bangyai;2518608]I've learnt my lesson with ' clinics '. Far better to go to a hospital and seek out the relevant specialist department.
Absolutely!

What puts me off these 'Clinics' is having to stumble over hundreds of pairs of flip flops before you even get in the door!

The local Government Hospital is a lot cleaner, more organized and professional.

[withnallstoke]

What puts me off these 'Clinics' is having to stumble over hundreds of pairs of flip flops before you even get in the door!

That's true.
Most of the patients were accompnied by their families, so there really was a bloody mountain of shoes outside.

For a rash on the face a cessation of muff diving for a fortnight often helps.

I have given up yodelling for Lent.

[Satonic]

More importantly, any pics of the nurses?

[peaches]

He spoke good English, diagnosed my condition as dermititus

G'day stoker,
Could be a diet thing, e.g too much acidic food,
not enough alkiline , same happened to me , gave
me some cream ( useless ) made it worse, I changed
my diet, now much better.
Just a thought

[Necron99]

Wank juice toxicity.

[Dillinger]

While we're on the subject...

I popped that Cyst between my arsehole and balls while sat on the toilet, half cut the other night, sure made my eyes water
it was about the same time the future King of England popped out. I'll never forgot where I was that night

I'd been dreading going the clinic with that and I'm never ever gonna run my brother's hair clippers down my arse crack again

Oh if you're eatin breakfast reading this, I got about half a pint of puss out of the fukker before the blood came

[Satonic]

^ Nice

[somtamslap]

This was my first visit to a Thai docs

...in a decade in the country.

I thought you said only poofs get sick, withnall?

Or have you eased up on the Wank Juice which was doing such a good job of preserving your organs?

Hospitals are worse.

1000s of patients/clients per day, all walking away with a sack of medicine. Dr. Somjit reckons he can cure a common cold with five grands worth of 'para'.

[withnallstoke]

I thought you said only poofs get sick, withnall?

I'm not sick, i just look like a leper with a dose of bubonic plague.

I popped that Cyst between my arsehole and balls while sat on the toilet, half cut the other night, sure made my eyes water

Cysts are a gift from god.
Great free entertainment squeezing shit out of them.
The trick is not to fully drain them, and rub a bit of dirt into them so they keep filling up.

[somtamslap]

Wank Juice side effects.

Your face might fall off.

[Cujo]

I'm never ever gonna run my brother's hair clippers down my arse crack again

Um, just as a matter of interest, why the fuck would you be running ANYones hair clippers down your ass crack?
And does your brother know where his hair clippers have been?

[Marmite the Dog]

Got back from the hospital a couple of hours ago. I've got a type of Dengue Fever apparently. Let's hope it shifts some of this lard.

[Rural Surin]

It's all about promoting pharmaceuticals....not health.

[Pragmatic]

Just go to your local Pharmacy. My local one will even give medical treatment including injections. The owner is a pharmacist at the hospital and his wife is a nurse. Job done. In and out 10 minutes.

[Albert Shagnastier]

He spoke good English, diagnosed my condition as old bastard crustyfacedness

It's a blight mate, a total blight.

Hash oil

[terry57]

Got back from the hospital a couple of hours ago. I've got a type of Dengue Fever apparently. Let's hope it shifts some of this lard.

Well Marmite, if you really have Dengue you should lose a good 4 Kilo as you wont eat fok all for a week.

Foking horrible it is.

[youneverknow]

I've learnt my lesson with ' clinics '. Far better to go to a hospital and seek out the relevant specialist department.

Absolutely!

What puts me off these 'Clinics' is having to stumble over hundreds of pairs of flip flops before you even get in the door!

The local Government Hospital is a lot cleaner, more organized and professional.

There may be hope after all. The government services beat out the private capitalist ones.

[klong toey]

Wank Juice side effects.

Your face might fall off.

Rare but you might be right Mr Slap Smegma of the face.This can cause inflammation (redness and swelling) of the head or face.
I recommend antibiotics or antifungal creams just got a certificate down KSR might as well put me 100 baht to good use.
My second diagnosis is Balanitis.

[Marmite the Dog]

Got back from the hospital a couple of hours ago. I've got a type of Dengue Fever apparently. Let's hope it shifts some of this lard.

Well Marmite, if you really have Dengue you should lose a good 4 Kilo as you wont eat fok all for a week.

Foking horrible it is.

A type of - not the real McCoy. Prolly only lose a kilo or 2.

[beerlaodrinker]

^ Diet and exercise ?

[Marmite the Dog]

Diet and exercise ?

Tried that. It was bollocks and did bugger all.

[Marmite the Dog]

Just got some Hydroxyzine dihydrohloride - hopefully they'll knock me out nicely at beddybyes time.