Laos Back to the Old Skool (the views of a very ignorant man)

[EmperorTud]

I should have immediately took heed, cancelled my plans and got a plane to either Manilla or Phnom Pehn for a week of debasement with a couple of drunken appearances at the Thai Embassy thrown in

Thai Embassy in Phnom Penh is notoriously bad and usually don't issue tourist visas to non-Khmers.

Shame, as PP is a great place.

[DrB0b]

In life, you get out much of what you put in. If you don't like Laos - don't bother to come back. Folks who want, rather than share aren't really worthwhile - are they?

Personally, I'll take Laos over Thailand any time - that's why I live there...

I thought you had to do a runner from Thailand after the cops on Suk Soi 7 found those 400 pills you'd stashed in your arse?

[Sculpto]

nice writing.. i laughed a lot.

[the dogcatcher]

I never found and entertainment places, are there any there? Although two girls who worked in the hotel did offer me st for 400bht.

[jubby]

Yeah, I just got back from a laos Trip. Didn't get to Vienteine. Luang Prabang was Nice though although it did take 7 hours on a bus to travel 200 kms to get there. I found my fellow travellers a bit uncouth couthing and spitting everywhere even the Ladies. There must be more tarmac in our Village than in the entire LPDR. The distinct Lack of smiles was rather odd after spending so much time in Thailand, although I'm sure I'd feel the same about the UK. I'm sure my bad habit picked up in Thailand of cracking half a smile at everyone came across rather odd too. Even my Lao Mia Noi who has a beautiful smile in Thailand developed a frown for the duration of the trip. I thought Thailand was laid back but Laos sort of reminded me of mexico for some reason although I've never been. I was a little paranoid I suppose as I had been told its illegal to fraternise with the Natives unless officially married, so maybe that put a damper on the trip.

I could be wrong but I got the impression it was Illegal to walk on the left and you had to walk in the same direction as the traffic so you couldn't see what was going to hit you. And whats with all the expensive Toyota Landcruiser VX 4x4's ? never seen so many in one place.

I drew what I thought was 10000 bahts worth of Kip from the ATM and made a scene when the tuk-tuk driver took me 100 yards and wanted what I thought was 400 baht for the trip. I then proceeded to walk everywhere until Lady friend told me the trip was only 40 baht. Still expensive though ;-)

On returning to Thailand I thought about kissing the ground and singing the national Anthem but didn't want to risk upsetting the Immigration Lady who was surprisingly very friendly indeed . I did wonder why the Thai Immigration official wished me good luck with a smile on my departure rather than the usual stoney Silence ;-) Its good to be Home , I Guess I just love all the Bullshit smiles !

Now where can I get Beer laos here ?

[Happyman]

Great stuff SLK - both posts !

I presume you were pissed out of your skull when you wrote 'Kota Kinabalu which is the Western bit of Malaysia' as it is in fact the most eastern city in East Malaysia !

But WTF ! good stuff - where is your next visa run to - your audience awaits !

[SiLeakHunt]

I'm a fuckwit sometimes. When finances permit will be my next trip report, which the way things are looking is likely to be the next decade at least.

Cheers

[kingwilly]

I presume you were pissed out of your skull when you wrote 'Kota Kinabalu which is the Western bit of Malaysia' as it is in fact the most eastern city in East Malaysia ! But WTF ! good stuff - where is your next visa run to - your audience awaits !

bladdy pendant.

but it was damn funny. good work silikunt

[grasshopper]

Good report. Keep up the medication though.

[robuzo]

Laos sort of reminded me of mexico for some reason although I've never been.

I'm sure Laos would remind me of some places I've never been, if I'd been to them that is. There is a potentially a zen koan or Leonard Cohen lyric in your or possibly my statement.

I could be wrong but I got the impression it was Illegal to walk on the left and you had to walk in the same direction as the traffic so you couldn't see what was going to hit you.

Just one of many quirky Lao laws- their version of population control. Amazing how they get all the corpses out of the way so quickly. Did you get a chance to try any of the sidewalks, by the way? Vientiane has a lot of them, and unlike Bangkok most are motorbike-free.

I drew what I thought was 10000 bahts worth of Kip from the ATM and made a scene when the tuk-tuk driver took me 100 yards and wanted what I thought was 400 baht for the trip. I then proceeded to walk everywhere until Lady friend told me the trip was only 40 baht. Still expensive though ;-)

You must have a really large wallet. Good thing Lady brought the calculator, eh? Kip exchange rate-calculatin' can be a real puzzler, right up there with solving the Schrodinger equation! It's always best to ask the price first and make a scene before departing, by the way.

On returning to Thailand I thought about kissing the ground and singing the national Anthem but didn't want to risk upsetting the Immigration Lady who was surprisingly very friendly indeed .

Bummer, kissing the ground and singing the national anthem gets you a smile and a blowjob. You should have checked on Teak Door before going.

Now where can I get Beer laos here ?

Lots of bars, but the only shop I know where they sell it is the tienda in my building. Not sure why, likely some sort of brewery conspiracy.

Great travelogue in terms of being a testimony to how safe and forgiving Laos can be for innocents abroad.

[Vientianeboy]

Please don't come back to Laos. We don't need fools like you.

[robuzo]

Please don't come back to Laos. We don't need fools like you.

"Maybe we don't more fools" would be more appropriate. I'm very fond of Vientiane, but it sure has a high concentration of knucklehead farangs- not necessarily like the one(s) above, but there is quite a cross-section. The most amusing contingency is the aging backpackers. Laos appears to be one of the places the remnants of the old India-Nepal-SE Asia (Thailand)-Japan backpacker trail mob is going to die.

[Vientianeboy]

Fair comment. I would agree with the above.

[robuzo]

I hope I didn't sound harsh. I meant in an "elephants' graveyard" sense, like Boca Raton for New Yorkers.

[watterinja]

Please don't come back to Laos. We don't need fools like you.

3 questions for you:

1. Why is Laos the 2nd poorest nation on the planet?
2. Would you invest in developing a business in Laos?
3. What would you estimate the corruption index to be in Laos (take Thailand at 5-10% as a starter)?

[robuzo]

Please don't come back to Laos. We don't need fools like you.

3 questions for you:

1. Why is Laos the 2nd poorest nation on the planet?
2. Would you invest in developing a business in Laos?
3. What would you estimate the corruption index to be in Laos (take Thailand at 5-10% as a starter)?

Is Laos really 2nd poorest in terms of per capita income? I think the poverty index is rather worse in quite a few other countries, including most of West Africa.

[pompeybloke]

I like Vientienne for 2 reasons: beer Laos, and no inane smiles...people mind their own business.

cheers

[watterinja]

^^ It used to be the poorest for quite some time. I also guess that a lot will depend on the index used.

Africa does take some beating, doesn't it...

[watterinja]

3. What would you estimate the corruption index to be in Laos (take Thailand at 5-10% as a starter)?

A clue... LOS times 10...

[Vientianeboy]

3 questions for you: 1. Why is Laos the 2nd poorest nation on the planet? 2. Would you invest in developing a business in Laos? 3. What would you estimate the corruption index to be in Laos (take Thailand at 5-10% as a starter)?

Watterinja, your statistics are incorrect. However I guess it depends from where you have sourced the information as measures vary.

1) It isn't. From where are you dredging that statistic. (Not that I am not saying it isn't in the top 15 poorest nations).

2) Yes, and I have. I certainly will do again as there is a lot of money to be made. Tip - invest in Lao shares when the stockmarket opens next year.

3) According to Forbes, Thailand is more corrupt than Laos. That is a moot point however, as both are corrupt. My personal experience is also that you can trust Laos business partners but not Thai. 10X times more corrupt is just silly.

[the dogcatcher]

Why is Laos so poor? And why are things expensive there?
No real industry that I can see, other than electricity and the average Laos citizen is not gonna see any of that money. No real foriegn investment, probably due to corruption. Has Laos any natural resourses? It may have but there is'nt the money to look for them. Communist government not elected so no accountability to the Laos people. No Sea port for import, export.
The French have been there, always seems to fck a country and leave it poor when the frechies have been in power. Same same Cambodia and Algeria, the later of which has more oil than Iraq and is still piss poor.
Perhaps it's just a place people should live cos it just does support life.

[robuzo]

The French have been there, always seems to fck a country and leave it poor when the frechies have been in power. Same same Cambodia and Algeria, the later of which has more oil than Iraq and is still piss poor.

The Thais resent the French having colonized Laos and Cambodia, too. They wanted large swaths of those countries for themselves, not to mention a couple of northern Malay states.

[the dogcatcher]

The French have been there, always seems to fck a country and leave it poor when the frechies have been in power. Same same Cambodia and Algeria, the later of which has more oil than Iraq and is still piss poor.

The Thais resent the French having colonized Laos and Cambodia, too. They wanted large swaths of those countries for themselves, not to mention a couple of northern Malay states.

Your point being?

[robuzo]

The French have been there, always seems to fck a country and leave it poor when the frechies have been in power. Same same Cambodia and Algeria, the later of which has more oil than Iraq and is still piss poor.

The Thais resent the French having colonized Laos and Cambodia, too. They wanted large swaths of those countries for themselves, not to mention a couple of northern Malay states.

Your point being?

You really need it explained? Look at it this way- do you detect a lot of resentment of the French among the Laos? There is probably a reason that French tourists still feel welcome there, in a way they probably don't in Algeria.

The Laos seem happy not to be part of Thailand. The last time I was there one thing they seem most concerned about now is not being part of China.

[the dogcatcher]

I don't detect resentment towards anyone by the Laotians. I don't see why they should resent the Chinese unless they are pissed off with being saddled by communism which the chincks had a hand in. Most the Laotian I know, and that's plenty, have no idea about the history of their own country. GF had no idea why she could by French bread everywhere in Laos and nowhere in Thailand, except Tescos. And no one feels welcome in Algeria, bloody dangerous place.