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  1. #1
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    walrus's Avatar
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    The Irish sausage

    Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money. Between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro.

    Murphy said 'Hang on, I have an idea.'

    He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage.

    Shamus said 'Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at all!'

    Murphy replied, 'Don't worry - just follow me.'

    He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses of Jameson Whisky.
    Shamus said 'Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money!!'

    Murphy replied, with a smile. 'Don't worry, I have a plan, Cheers!'

    They downed their drinks. Murphy said, 'OK, I'll stick the sausage through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth.'

    The barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out.

    They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk, all for free.

    At the tenth pub Shamus said 'Murphy - I don't think I can do any more of this. I'm drunk and me knees are killin' me!'

    Murphy said, 'How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third pub

  2. #2
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    from a fellow seamus yurr fecking cuuunt

  3. #3
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    ^ Dont worry Seamus if I go out drinking with you I wont suck your sausage ... I'm a 'guinness only' sort of guy

  4. #4
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    Paddy is sitting at home in Belfast late one Sunday evening when he hears a knock at the door. He gets up and opens the door. Standing there is a guy in a balaclava and a gun, he shouts at Paddy, what are ya?, prodistant or catholic. Patty being a bit of a smart bastard replies " I jewish". With that the fella pulls off his balaclava and says, "Well, are ya now? I guess that makes me the luckiest Arab in the whole of Belfast".

  5. #5
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    Walrus, you buy the guinness i'll buy the jameson's 50/50 on the entertainment ! ps glad you'll leave my sausage alone !

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