The Puns and jokes thread

[Mendip]

^ Ah dinnae ken?

[david44]

It's not that the man didn't know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.

[david44]

I directed a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words

[Mendip]

^ It's curtains for you then.

[david44]

^ It's curtains for you then.

I'm trying to pull myself together with Rod's help.

[david44]

Thanks for explaining the word 'many' to me, it means a lot.

[david44]

Mendy knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards his pond, so I gave him a glass of water

[Mendip]

I thought I had a bad cold, but it's not.

[Molle]

A perfectionist walks into a bar but leaves immediately because the bar was not set high enough.

[Molle]

Eating watches is time consuming



Don't worry, I'll see myself out

[david44]

What does tax call his X rays? Tooth pics

[Molle]

Thanks for explaining the word 'many' to me, it means a lot.

plethora - it means a lot to me

subtraction - it makes the difference

[Mendip]

'Nipple', a lovely word.

It just slips off the tongue.

[DrWilly]

Particularly down sukhumwit rd.

[david44]

I took the chairlift.
It’s all downhill from here

[david44]

When I tripped in Paris,
Eiffel over

[david44]

A Cy is just a sigh butt the days of good grammar has went

[david44]

Trash collectors are rubbish drivers

[david44]

Swallowing Scrabble tiles could spell disaster.

[DrWilly]

Swallowing Scrabble tiles could spell disaster.

your next trip to the toilet may well spell disaster and you might end up shitting bricks.

[Mendip]

Swallowing Scrabble tiles could spell disaster.

Not if you're Edmond it couldn't.

Maybe DIS or AST ?

[DrWilly]

[hallelujah]

Customer: "Do you have that book about living with a small penis?"

Librarian: "I don't think it's in yet."

Customer: "Yes, that's the one!"

[david44]

Reader to Librarian do you have the complete works of Mao?
Sorry Lulu, Do you like Kipling?
I dunno I never Kippled