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Thread: GFawn Jokes

  1. #51
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    What do you call a Filipino walking a dog? A vegetarian

  2. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by chassamui View Post
    Pat and Punty turn out of the pub in the early hours.
    A pub,...where you interact w/ 3-D women and pay a bill at the end?

    That is funny.


  3. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by hick
    pay a bill at the end?
    Punty may have paid, but Pat has form for that kind of thing. 555

  4. #54
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    Why do woman have two sets of lips? One set to tell you off with, and the other to make you forget you're mad!

  5. #55
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    And they are "interchangeable"...Heh...

  6. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by BaitongBoy View Post
    And they are "interchangeable"...Heh...
    Is that so? Heh. 555

  7. #57
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    "You're getting old when your wife says, "Honey, lets run upstairs and make love," and you answer, "I can't do both."

  8. #58
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    The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?” “Why?” “Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.”
    I am so unlucky that if I fall into a barrel full of D*ick**s, I'd come out sucking my own thumb!

  9. #59
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    Man is incomplete until he’s married. Then he’s finished.

  10. #60
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    A groom waits at the altar with a huge smile on his face. His best man asks, "Why do you look so excited?" The groom replies, "I just had the best blow job I have ever had in my entire life, and I am marrying the wonderful woman who gave it to me." The bride waits at the other end of the aisle with a huge smile on her face. Her maid of honor asks, "Why do you look so excited?" The bride replies, "I just gave the last blow job of my entire life."

  11. #61
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    Hahaha an old one but still great

  12. #62
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    I had to get rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.

  13. #63
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    A wife sending a short message to her husband: It was just said on the news that they found a hideous corpse with a hollow head, a cigar among ugly rotten teeth and a bottle of liquor in his hand. I'm worried about you!. Please, give me a ring...

  14. #64
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    Wife: Darling, do I please you in bed?
    Husband: Yes, I love that trick you do with your mouth.
    Wife: What trick?
    Husband: The one where you shut the fuck up and go to sleep.

  15. #65
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    Dear Karma,
    I have a list of people you missed!

  16. #66
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    ^^^ poor

    ^^ pretty good

    ^ awful

    I think I will have to red Cujo.

  17. #67
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    Three nurses working in a morgue discover a dead man with a hard on. The 1st nurse says, ‘I can’t let that go to waste’, and rides him. The 2nd nurse does the same. The 3rd nurse hesitates and explains she is on her period, but does him anyway. Then the man sits up and the nurses apologize saying they thought he was dead. The man replies ‘I was, but after two jump starts and a blood transfusion I feel fuckin great!!!’

  18. #68
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    The teacher asks Timmy “why is your cat at school today?” Timmy says, crying, “Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, Im going to eat that pussy when the kid leaves, so Im saving him”

  19. #69
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    A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog. It's a shitzu.

  20. #70
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    ^ and ^^ oldies but goodies.

  21. #71
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iceman123 View Post
    ^^^ poor

    ^^ pretty good

    ^ awful

    I think I will have to red Cujo.


  22. #72
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    Q: What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?
    A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.

  23. #73
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    A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:
    "Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."
    "You foul-mouthed sex obsessed swine," retorted the lady indignantly.
    "In this country ... we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives ...
    "Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."

  24. #74
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    Three friends decided to bet each other $100 on who could make their wives scream more from sex.

    They all go home to have sex with their wives and make them scream.

    The next day they meet. The first friend says, "I made love to my wife for 2 hours and she was screaming for at least 1 1/2 hours."

    The second friend says, "That's nothing, I start licking my wife for two hours and she was screaming the whole time and two and a half hour after that."

    The third friend says, " That's nothing, I made love to my wife for ten minutes, I came a couple times, I wiped my Dick in the curtain and she's still screaming.

  25. #75
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    ICEMAN dahling... that dick of yours is nowhere near the fire. Roll out more hose man. The REDs are turning me on.....
    Last edited by GracelessFawn; 02-08-2017 at 08:54 PM.

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