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  1. #51
    splendid and tremendous
    somtamslap's Avatar
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    Thank you, gents. Just seen that I've got the wrong valves on my spare inner tubes - which means I have to fuck off into town fully laden before heading to the train station. This wasn't part of the plan, but it'll give me the opportunity to test inner-city manoeuvrability.

    I think I may indulge heavily in the beverage section of the buffet service, this is starting to give me a headache.

  2. #52
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    i must say i'm a tad jealous slap. it's the one tour that i havn't done yet.toured on quite a few continents, but i hope to do it one day..

    all the best,it will be a blast

  3. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Dillinger
    Why aren't you doing it for charity?
    Should've done in hindsight. Feel free to get your cheque book out, Bolski.
    I admire the fact that he's doing it for himself and not for some charity.

    Every man and his dog on social networks are daily setting up donating pages for any old challenge.

    Thanks for sharing with us Slaps, owe you a Wetherspoons dinner and a few beers when you get to my neck of the woods.

  4. #54
    splendid and tremendous
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    Day 1: a long day. Little riding but a long, long day.

    Woke up early shatting my pants. Had a coffee; the fucker nearly sent me over the edge. Thought about things with a little more pragmatism, packed up, locked up and fucked off up to the train station.

    Reading to Penzance - 5hrs ensconced in a First Great Western carriage. Twas a little shabby. Certainly not the South West service I'm used to.

    Had buffet car - expensive as Singapore.

    I bought a ploughman's sandwich and miniature Gordons - tenner!

    Arrived in Penzance early, at around 5.25pm.

    Decided to cycle straight down to Land's End and back to my dwellings so as to make tomorrow a bit easier.

    The undulations en route were severe. 16 per cent gradients appeared very much en vogue...

    Took the obligatory pictures and rode back via a chip shop in Newlyn and rather pleasant public house where I've just spent the evening 'borrowing' tobacco from the landlady...

    Approaching Land's End...



    The most southerly point of the British Isles...



    The fully laden cycle waits stoically at the start...



    Sensational fish and chips sold here. I plumped for the catch of the day - a lovely bit of battered hake...



    Last stop of the day...


  5. #55
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    And he starts. On ya slaps.

    I agree with Chitto bang bang, too many tossers asking for a handout these days.

  6. #56
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    with a fart and a belch he announces his presence

    need to get this over with before winter sets in

  7. #57
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
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    Great stuff slap.

    Plenty of photos please, more pub shots, bollocks to the scenery.

  8. #58
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    Quote Originally Posted by withnallstoke View Post
    Great stuff slap.

    Plenty of photos please, more pub shots, bollocks to the scenery.
    Speaking for the masses, mate!


  9. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap View Post



    Just out of interest, why are there TWO nearly identical bikes parked there, only one of which is Mr Slaps. Notice the similar panniers......

    Sherlock "nidhogg" Holmes thinks there is a part of the story that Mr Slap has avoided telling us......

  10. #60
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
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    Quote Originally Posted by nidhogg
    there is a part of the story that Mr Slap has avoided telling us......

  11. #61
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    ^^ It'll be his bum chum!

  12. #62
    Thailand Expat klong toey's Avatar
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    ^^^Slaps has splashed out on disc brakes.

  13. #63
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    Ploughmans and gin for brekkers? You should get witheringspoons to sponso your daily full English if you are serious about this adventure.

  14. #64
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    Spill the beans Slap, is this a solo mission or a tandem effort?

  15. #65
    splendid and tremendous
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    Quote Originally Posted by nidhogg
    Sherlock "nidhogg" Holmes thinks there is a part of the story that Mr Slap has avoided telling us......


    Quote Originally Posted by Iceman123
    Spill the beans Slap, is this a solo mission or a tandem effort?
    Solo effort - but I met a most affable gent on the train on the way down to Land's End and we cycled together yesterday and today (which was fucking hilly btw). Now on my lonesome just outside of Bodmin. Day report coming up after I've had dinner and ale...

  16. #66
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    Fuk Slap!

    I leave you alone for five mins at home with the wife n kids and you come up with this excuse to go to the pub.

    Everyone see through your holiday in Somalia wheeze....

    They sure did good teaching you that photo shop in the office yeah....


    Ok - Once upon a bike in Wigan - I'll get me pencils out......

    Be good....






    Oh yeah everyone. The last time I was out with him in Guildford, he couldn't find the right platform home.

    hope they left you ankle tag on mate...
    Do you know what nemesis means?

  17. #67
    splendid and tremendous
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smug Farang Bore
    Ok - Once upon a bike in Wigan - I'll get me pencils out......
    It has potential. Let's talk.

    Today I woke up in a fucking youth hostel to the sound of an old man simultaneously snoring and speaking arse. I thought I was the only one that did that. On a positive note I was most cheered at the sight of an empty bottom bunk - I suggest that my backside had been its usual formidable self throughout the night.

    In short though - YHA can fuck RIGHT off. It's strictly plush b&bs for me from now on...



    After yesterday evening's 12-mile meander up from Land's End to Penzance, it was decided that pushing on should be the order of the day. With my new acquaintance - a mad bastard who has a penchant for poring over maps at speed along A roads, but as genial a fellow as you'll meet - we hit the road to Redruth, passing St Michael's Mount en route...





    Once in Redruth - or a third of the way to my eventual destination of Bodmin, my acquaintance would bugger off a further 20 miles up the road today - I happened upon this, the oldest Cornish pasty maker in the WHOLE WIDE WORLD.



    Cycling makes you hungry - which is handy because the food which you hunger for allows you to consistently ride ridiculous daily mileage. So some 15 miles after the Cornish pasty shop we stopped in a pub for a beef and horseradish sandwich...



    The road was awful. Quiet, but awful. It undulated incorrigibly. At the end of the day when I finally arrived in my dwelling - after 58 miles - we had ascended over 5,100 feet. That's pretty gosh darn intense.

    As I previously mentioned, only plush b&b for me now, and this more than fits the bill.



    However, it's in the middle of fucking nowhere and I could only afford bread for dinner...



    I'm off to Barnstaple tomorrow. The b&b owner has promised me spag bol upon my arrival.

    It's gonna be another hilly one, chaps!
    Last edited by somtamslap; 17-08-2015 at 02:04 AM.

  18. #68
    splendid and tremendous
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    In the meantime, this pint of real Cornish ale needs supping.

    Cheers!


  19. #69
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    Admit it, you brought Godders with you!

  20. #70
    On a walkabout Loy Toy's Avatar
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    As always fantastic thread mate.

    Great pictures and commentary.

  21. #71
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    Yes enjoy and more photos of Food, not NUDE's! in Boots!

  22. #72
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    Quote Originally Posted by kingwilly
    Admit it, you brought Godders with you!
    Godders is still in the fucking Lake District. I'll probably be able to smell the degenerate wreck from the west midlands.

  23. #73
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    Hey Slap, please relate any interesting encounters you have with Cornish people. Apparently they (along with the Welsh) really are genetically distinct from people elsewhere in Britain. DNA shows the Cornish really are different | Cornish Guardian

  24. #74
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    We don't need any intimate details of slaps encounters with Lycra clad Cornish rent boys he's made travelling companions with, thanks LD

    Is that a carpet burn ?


  25. #75
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    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap
    Decided to cycle straight down to Land's End and back to my dwellings so as to make tomorrow a bit easier.
    So you started cheating before the journey had even started!!!



    This is a superb endeavour, Explorer Slaps, which will be right up there with those two nutters that cleared a mountainside in Samui armed only with their bare hands and their love of intimate manly friendships.

    If you achieve your goal, which I actually doubt..., then we should create a beer fund in Thailand for you in which every member of the forum should add the equivalent of one Change (large bottle), one LaoKao (shot) and one kaopad gob (with fried egg) at the exchange rate of either the first day of your journey or the last day (whichever is lower...); that's about 100 baht, so with the 15 or so TD members, you could be rich if you fight this battle to the end!
    Cycling should be banned!!!

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