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  1. #26
    splendid and tremendous
    somtamslap's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chittychangchang
    Beware them canal paths oop north they've been known to chew people up and spit them out.
    I can handle a bit of chewing, so long as it's done on a flat surface - a la canal paths.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gerbil
    tch out for the pubs on the moors up north.
    I'll nay be going anywhere near the moors or the dales, and the lakes will see my wheels for about 10 miles. We're all about keeping shit flat.

  2. #27
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    Another gay thread from M.Almond.Slaps...





    I suppose... that's what Croydon does to any otherwise all manly Issan man...

  3. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by taxexile
    big breakfasts will be needed on a trip like this.... some ruddy cheeked thick thighed northern farmers daughters to keep him warm at nights might come in handy too. taxexile is offline
    I would add a big bag of patches and another half dozen inner tubes at least. Esoecially if you are going X country.
    Bon voyage o brave one.


  4. #29
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    Slaps & Stoker, Samui, circa 1987?


  5. #30
    splendid and tremendous
    somtamslap's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chassamui
    I would add a big bag of patches and another half dozen inner tubes at least.
    Two spare tubes should hopefully last me until the midlands. Got the patches and the levers. If spokes start snapping, though, I'm fecked.


    Quote Originally Posted by Bettyboo
    Slaps & Stoker, Samui, circa 1987?
    More like 2003, Betsy. Admit it, Booby, this is the most masculine thing anyone that you know has ever done.

  6. #31
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    Don't force me to link my Erasure collection into the thread...

  7. #32
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    slap next week cycling through the North of England..


  8. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chittychangchang View Post
    slap next week cycling through the North of England..

    I'm sure you'll be able to pick one of these up cheap in the Midlands..


  9. #34
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    I knew you were mental Slaps, this just proves it

  10. #35
    splendid and tremendous
    somtamslap's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chittychangchang
    I'm sure you'll be able to pick one of these up cheap in the Midlands..
    I'm planning on sprinting passed the midlands. That's where Stoke is, isn't it?


    Quote Originally Posted by Neo
    knew you were mental Slaps, this just proves it
    Just getting the legs ready for the big one over to Bangkok

  11. #36
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    Why aren't you doing it for charity?

    After Robin Williams death and Stoke City's performances in Singapore, there are people out there that need an arm around them

  12. #37
    splendid and tremendous
    somtamslap's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dillinger
    Why aren't you doing it for charity?
    Should've done in hindsight. Feel free to get your cheque book out, Bolski.

  13. #38
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    I'd gladly buy a pub lunch for you mate, Wetherspoons obviously

    Are you going through Worcester and brum and taking in the canals?

    Be nice to see a map of your route

  14. #39
    splendid and tremendous
    somtamslap's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dillinger
    Are you going through Worcester and brum and taking in the canals?
    I'm gonna be staying on the Westside innit. There's an NCN route that leads from Bristol up to Shropshire, so I'll go via Hereford all being well.

    Will try to upload route maps every evening. I'm looking to ride between 70-100 miles per day.

  15. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap View Post
    Just getting the legs ready for the big one over to Bangkok





  16. #41
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    Good stuff old chap.

  17. #42
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    After 100 miles a day, your hands will be good for map squiggle uploads and not much else. Just imagine 12 days without a tug.

  18. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap
    Here she is in her unburdened state...
    I fail to see the motor

    did you pack your teakdoor amulet ?

  19. #44
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
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    Dear Mr Slap,

    I think you are a very brave man.

    It takes some large bollocks and some strong ale for a southern botty toucher to leave familiar settings to venture North into the real England.

    As a friend, i implore you to stop when you reach the large Roman wall running east-west across the top of the country. Venture north of that, and there there be Scotch peoples - a folk so barbaric, so ginger, and so gutteral as to cause offense to your delicate sensibilities.
    And the men wear skirts, which could explain your compulsion to go there.

    Take care Slap.

    Would you like to rent my bike?

  20. #45
    On a walkabout Loy Toy's Avatar
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    When I opened the OP and saw the bike I thought instantly of Dirty Dog's car which was the same colour.

    Keep clear of the rashes Slaps and keep the fluid intake up.

    See you at the next report and stay safe.

  21. #46
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    Best of british slaps. Just take it easy on the first few days and dont get dehydrated.drink water and elecrolites every half an hour even if you dont feel thirsty. I rode from holyhead to cardiff in 1day , about 320 kms if i remember right, and i was a spritley 45 years young then..
    Good luck

  22. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap
    Got the patches and the levers.
    I used to use spoons.

    Good luck, Slap...You'll fookin' need it!

  23. #48
    I am not a cat
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    Smooth roads and good cycling Mr Slap.

    I must admit to a touch of jealousy. To set oneself such an admirable endeavour and start out on it is a marvellous thing. far, far too long since I have done anything even remotely similar.


    Anyway, for our non-British brethren, a map showing a route from Lands End to John o' Groats.

    Best of British Mr Slap.


  24. #49
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    Thanks for pointing that out, I didnt realise. I thought it was just a little venture Slaps was heading out on.

  25. #50
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    The perineum is the area between the anus and the base of the penis in males and between the anus and the vagina in females; it contains both blood vessels and nerves. Compression of the perineum can lead to nerve damage, swelling, artery insufficiency (lack of blood flow through the vessel), and even occlusion (blockage) of blood vessels, which in turn can lead to temporary or permanent groin numbness, tingling sensations, decreased penile blood supply, erectile dysfunction (impotence), decreased orgasm sensitivity, and pain. These cycling-related perineal symptoms are the subject of this article.
    Best you read this Slap..... Groin Numbness and Bike Riding – Causes, Symptoms and Signs on MedicineNet.com

    Good luck Mr Floppy

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