D-I-V-O-R-C-E

**November Rain** · 09-09-2007, 08:22 PM

OK, a real challenge for the legal eagles out there

I'm married to a UK guy (15 years) I'm a UK citizen also & we were married in UK. We separated 6 years ago. We have been in periodic touch via phone, email & visit (the last one 5 years ago) since then. I have tried to divorce him once (I was in HK, he in PI) about 6 years ago, but he wouldn't comply, it ran up a huge bill & I had to drop it.

He now lives in Canada. He has had relationships & so have I. I was led to believe I couldn't divorce him from here (a Thai lawyer told me that 5 years ago) & he won't divorce me. I have since found out that I can divorce him from here. Does anybody know the procedure (given the amount of time we've been separated)? How difficult is it? Any help would be appreciated. Thanks

**chinthee** · 09-09-2007, 08:25 PM

Wish i could help you NR, but not familiar with UK family law. However, given the fact that he now lives in Canada, you might check Candian law to see if they have no-fault divorce laws. If so, could be easy. Maybe some Candians on this board.

* Apart from myself, I believe only Ant Robertson is legally trained, but I could be wrong. Not sure if he knows UK family law though...

**keda** · 09-09-2007, 08:38 PM

not advice at all, but as you were married in uk i guess that's the jurisdiction for your divorce...also, probably changed and now easier than my time, which allowed a divorce by either side after a brief (2 years?) desertion/separation.

**November Rain** · 09-09-2007, 09:08 PM

Hmm, I called a few UK lawyers & I have to be resident there for 6 months before I can start divorce proceedings (not gonna happen!) I was hoping I could do it from here.

**klongmaster** · 09-09-2007, 09:13 PM

Originally Posted by chinthee

* Apart from myself, I believe only Ant Robertson is legally trained, but I could be wrong. Not sure if he knows UK family law though...

are you forgetting our esteemed William...

**blackgang** · 09-09-2007, 09:27 PM

Guns are mostly legal in Canada, maybe a hitman would be the best, surest and cheapest route.
They sometimes feed em to the hogs to dispose of the bodys, so in case the shot didn't do it, the hogs damn sure will.

**The Basket Weaver** · 09-09-2007, 09:30 PM

Originally Posted by blackgang

Guns are mostly legal in Canada, maybe a hitman would be the best, surest and cheapest route.
They sometimes feed em to the hogs to dispose of the bodys, so in case the shot didn't do it, the hogs damn sure will.

oh, I wonder why she didnt think of that...

**chinthee** · 09-09-2007, 09:32 PM

NR, sorry for being intrusive, but why won't he give you a divorce? No penalty for not answering.

**William** · 09-09-2007, 09:45 PM

Hi NR - when I did my divorce (in the UK) both my ex and I were in Thailand. We arranged it all through the following website:

Her Majesty's Courts Service - Home

here's the part about divorce

Divorce

I should say, the process did take me almost 2 years from filing the documents to the decree absolute coming through. Also, in my case it was not a contested divorce. If it was contested, I think it would have been more difficult.

~W~

**November Rain** · 09-09-2007, 10:18 PM

Originally Posted by chinthee

NR, sorry for being intrusive, but why won't he give you a divorce? No penalty for not answering.

Seriously, I really don't know. I only have 2 guesses: 1 He thinks I'll screw him for alimony or whatever, but if that's the case, he should really know better than that. 2 He's a commitment-phobe who uses "I'm married" to stop his new relationships going too far or expecting too much. My vote is with number 2, but I really don't know. He won't discuss it.

**November Rain** · 09-09-2007, 10:23 PM

Thanks William. Would this procedure apply here, too?

Doh! Just reread your post & saw my answer! Thanks very much.

**Thaddeus** · 09-09-2007, 11:31 PM

NR.

I'm not a lawyer and my best advice would to be seek some legal help.

From my limited knowledge, if you had applied for a Decree Nisi when you first seperated, your ex would have had two years to contest that, if no contest was forthcoming a Decree Absolute would have been granted automatically.

After this length of time you should be able to apply for a divorce on the grounds of abandoment, it shouldn't matter who lives where, you aren't a couple and haven't been for some time.

I'll check this out with a good friend of mine, and give you a better answer when I have one.

**keda** · 10-09-2007, 08:23 AM

Originally Posted by November Rain

Hmm, I called a few UK lawyers & I have to be resident there for 6 months before I can start divorce proceedings (not gonna happen!) I was hoping I could do it from here.

What would serve as adequate proof of 6 months residence?

**chinthee** · 10-09-2007, 09:54 AM

Originally Posted by keda

Originally Posted by November Rain

Hmm, I called a few UK lawyers & I have to be resident there for 6 months before I can start divorce proceedings (not gonna happen!) I was hoping I could do it from here.

What would serve as adequate proof of 6 months residence?

Yeah, great minds think alike. I was pondering how she could legally establish the running on this 6 month rule. One trip to Vancouver and rent a P.O. Box maybe? Ask a Canadian lawyer.

**November Rain** · 10-09-2007, 10:13 AM

^ It's UK I'd have to be resident in for 6 months, but my Mum lives back there now, so maybe she could vouch I'd been living with her. Possibly she can apply for something in my name to establish a postal address for me (hers). You've put the idea into my head, thanks, guys.

I'll ask her to go to the CAB when she has time & ask them what proof of residence would have to be.

**Marmite the Dog** · 10-09-2007, 10:24 AM

Originally Posted by William

Hi NR - when I did my divorce (in the UK) both my ex and I were in Thailand. We arranged it all through the following website:

Her Majesty's Courts Service - Home

here's the part about divorce

Divorce

I should say, the process did take me almost 2 years from filing the documents to the decree absolute coming through. Also, in my case it was not a contested divorce. If it was contested, I think it would have been more difficult.

~W~

This still shouldn't be a problem if one party can prove that they've been separated for more than two years.

**lom** · 10-09-2007, 10:31 AM

^ I think the clock does not start ticking until you have filed intent to divorce..
Only being apart is not seen as an intent.

**keda** · 10-09-2007, 10:33 AM

Originally Posted by November Rain

^ It's UK I'd have to be resident in for 6 months, but my Mum lives back there now, so maybe she could vouch I'd been living with her. Possibly she can apply for something in my name to establish a postal address for me (hers). You've put the idea into my head, thanks, guys.

I'll ask her to go to the CAB when she has time & ask them what proof of residence would have to be.

correct, it shouldn't take more than 6 months to prove you've been living there 6 months, even if you've never stepped on british soil...may be why so many people risk their lives for the opportunity at the easy life.

**Marmite the Dog** · 10-09-2007, 11:06 AM

Originally Posted by lom

^ I think the clock does not start ticking until you have filed intent to divorce..
Only being apart is not seen as an intent.

That wasn't the case for my divorce.

We'd been apart for about 4 years and then the papers were filed. All completed within 3 months.

**kingwilly** · 10-09-2007, 11:45 AM

^ same same for me!

**lom** · 10-09-2007, 12:25 PM

Originally Posted by Marmite the Dog

That wasn't the case for my divorce. We'd been apart for about 4 years and then the papers were filed. All completed within 3 months.

But both of you agreed to the divorce, right?

In most European countries you can have a quick divorce when both parties agrees and no children are involved.

**Marmite the Dog** · 10-09-2007, 12:44 PM

Originally Posted by lom

But both of you agreed to the divorce, right?

Yes, but I'm fairly sure it wouldn't make much difference if you can prove you've been apart for over 2 years.

**lom** · 10-09-2007, 12:58 PM

Hopefully for NR, you're right and I am only applying to much swedish thinking into this.
A bit hard for me though to believe that England with its traditional conservative values is more modern than us in this aspect.

**Marmite the Dog** · 10-09-2007, 01:56 PM

Originally Posted by lom

A bit hard for me though to believe that England with its traditional conservative values is more modern than us in this aspect.

I think you'll find British law has always been ahead of everyone.

**William** · 10-09-2007, 02:04 PM

^by "British" law, one assumes you are talking about Scottish law, rather than England and Wales

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