Bed sharing 'drains men's brains'

**dirtydog** · 24-01-2010, 03:45 AM

Bed sharing 'drains men's brains'

Bed sharing disturbed sleep quality

Sharing a bed with someone could temporarily reduce your brain power - at least if you are a man - Austrian scientists suggest.

When men spend the night with a bed mate their sleep is disturbed, whether they make love or not, and this impairs their mental ability the next day.

The lack of sleep also increases a man's stress hormone levels.

According to the New Scientist study, women who share a bed fare better because they sleep more deeply.

Sleepless nights

Professor Gerhard Kloesch and colleagues at the University of Vienna studied eight unmarried, childless couples in their 20s.

Each couple was asked to spend 10 nights sleeping together and 10 apart while the scientists assessed their rest patterns with questionnaires and wrist activity monitors.

The next day the couples were asked to perform simple cognitive tests and had their stress hormone levels checked.

Sharing the bed space with someone who is making noises and who you have to fight with for the duvet is not sensible

Professor Neil Stanley, a sleep expert at the University of Surrey

Although the men reported they had slept better with a partner, they fared worse in the tests, with their results suggesting they actually had more disturbed sleep.

Both sexes had a more disturbed night's sleep when they shared their bed, Professor Kloesch told a meeting of the Forum of European Neuroscience.

But women apparently managed to sleep more deeply when they did eventually drop off, since they claimed to be more refreshed than their sleep time suggested.

Their stress hormone levels and mental scores did not suffer to the same extent as the men.

But the women still reported that they had the best sleep when they were alone in bed.

Bed sharing also affected dream recall. Women remembered more after sleeping alone and men recalled best after sex.

Separate beds

Dr Neil Stanley, a sleep expert at the University of Surrey, said: "It's not surprising that people are disturbed by sleeping together.

"Historically, we have never been meant to sleep in the same bed as each other. It is a bizarre thing to do.

"Sleep is the most selfish thing you can do and it's vital for good physical and mental health.

"Sharing the bed space with someone who is making noises and who you have to fight with for the duvet is not sensible.

"If you are happy sleeping together that's great, but if not there is no shame in separate beds."

He said there was a suggestion that women are pre-programmed to cope better with broken sleep.

"A lot of life events that women have disturb sleep - bringing up children, the menopause and even the menstrual cycle," he explained.

But Dr Stanley added people did get used to sharing a bed.

"If they have shared their bed with their partner for a long time they miss them and that will disturb sleep."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/5197440.stm

**britmaveric** · 24-01-2010, 03:52 AM

So have a shag bed then kip alone is the answer?

**Mid** · 24-01-2010, 03:58 AM

"If they have shared their bed with their partner for a long time they miss them and that will disturb sleep."

that be all the bases covered then Quack , talk about money for old rope !

**Spin** · 24-01-2010, 04:05 AM

Gotta say I sleep a lot better when I have a double bed to sprawl all over. Its a lot less restrictive.

Thinking about it, I might shove the missus out in the garden on a hammock.

**daveboy** · 24-01-2010, 04:09 AM

I have to agree my wife always disturbs my sleep I'm much happier when she sods off to my sons bed. I was well pleased when we holidayed last year and the hotel gave us a room with single beds they offered to move us the next day but I declined.

**Marmite the Dog** · 24-01-2010, 08:19 AM

Apart from the covers disappearing, the Midget doesn't wake me up in the night.

The rooster that lives over the back and the kids either going for a piss at midnight or waking up at 4am do though.

I'll pretend to be a scientist and write about how rooster and kids shouldn't be nearby if you want a good night's sleep.

**patsycat** · 24-01-2010, 05:15 PM

Try being a woman trying to sleep beside a snoring, farting, runs în his sleep sort.

**Gerbil** · 24-01-2010, 05:19 PM

so, short time is better for you than long time then?

**daveboy** · 24-01-2010, 05:33 PM

Originally Posted by patsycat

Try being a woman trying to sleep beside a snoring, farting, runs în his sleep sort.

Have we meet ?

**nikster** · 24-01-2010, 05:37 PM

So one thing you need to know about these recurring studies is that they are all from the same people - the guy from surrey is always involved, he just hates sleeping with his wife in the same bed. And he doesn't shut up about it. The Austrian guy I have also heard of. It might even be true for them, but.. horses for courses...

One thing is definitely true though - women cope better with broken sleep, as our newborn proves. The wife is drowsy when woken up every 2 hours at night whereas I know I would be completely incapacitated the next day.

Men, on the other hand, don't wake as easily to begin with. At least true for myself and others where I happen to know this.

**Panda** · 24-01-2010, 05:54 PM

Originally Posted by patsycat

Try being a woman trying to sleep beside a snoring, farting, runs în his sleep sort.

Arr.. we just do that to piss off you selfish bitches who steal all the covers.

On a more serious note, I reckon its got something to do with a more primitive protective instinct. Like a man sleeps less deeply when he has a woman in his bed, and likewise a woman would sleep less deeply when she has a child/infant in her bed. The point being that the "protector" sleeps less deeply.

I do believe the sleep experts have got it arse about proclaiming that humans are programmed to sleep alone. Humans are pack animals by nature and evolution, designed to live and sleep in groups for protection as much as anything else. Wouldn't it make sense for an individual to sleep close to another who he/she cares most about. And wouldn't it make sense for the stronger of the group to sleep lighter so as to to protect the group and their loved ones?

We may be all pretty smart and civilized now, but we have been around as cave men for a couple of hundred thousand years in our present form before that. Some of the survival instincts that may have been of benefit 100,000 years ago may not quite fit in with modern theories. But in essence we are genetically still virtually exactly the same.

I dont know about you lot, but in both my marriages the wives have chosen their side of the bed as the furthest away from the door. Or maybe it was me who chose my side closest to the bedroom door? Anyway it was by mutual agreement. The theory, in my mind at least, is that I would be the first line of defence if an intruder entered the room. It was never something that needed to be discussed or debated. Just taken for granted as the norm. Would be interesting to see if others have fallen into the same pattern?

**daveboy** · 24-01-2010, 06:05 PM

Originally Posted by Panda

The theory, in my mind at least, is that I would be the first line of defence if an intruder entered the room. It was never something that needed to be discussed or debated. Just taken for granted as the norm. Would be interesting to see if others have fallen into the same pattern?

I must be a coward I sleep near the window.

**PlanK** · 24-01-2010, 06:19 PM

^^
Was thinking something similar the other day. I'm right-handed and on buses & trains I always feel better sitting on the right hand side, near the back. Which makes sense for safety reasons. In an accident the front of the bus or train is most likely to hit, the back next most likely. And if I was attacked I'd be able to fend with my left arm and still have my stronger arm free.

Thinking about it some more, I also prefer to have my sleeping partner on my right side, with my left hand side facing the door.

I reckon I'd make a good caveman. I'm just so primitive in many ways.

**Slipstream** · 24-01-2010, 06:24 PM

Everyones different, some folk sleep well together, some don't. It depends on the connection they both have.

**Norton** · 24-01-2010, 06:30 PM

Originally Posted by Spin

Thinking about it, I might shove the missus out in the garden on a hammock.

Recommend you put her in a green net bag. Keeps em from running off. Just ignore her howling and have a nice sleep.

**Panda** · 24-01-2010, 06:56 PM

Originally Posted by Plan B

^^
Was thinking something similar the other day. I'm right-handed and on buses & trains I always feel better sitting on the right hand side, near the back. Which makes sense for safety reasons. In an accident the front of the bus or train is most likely to hit, the back next most likely. And if I was attacked I'd be able to fend with my left arm and still have my stronger arm free.

Thinking about it some more, I also prefer to have my sleeping partner on my right side, with my left hand side facing the door.

I reckon I'd make a good caveman. I'm just so primitive in many ways.

A certain degree of paranoia is one of the modern survival instincts me thinks.

Probably a left over from the long ago days when our ancestors were liable to attack from some nasty predators, --- especially at night.

If you believe everyone is out to get you, --- they probably are.

**Panda** · 24-01-2010, 07:03 PM

Originally Posted by Slipstream

Everyones different, some folk sleep well together, some don't. It depends on the connection they both have.

Agree. After the "connection", best to piss her off to another room so you can have a smoke and a beer in peace without her nagging you about fixing this or that.

Back in the cave man days women were hard to come by, but these days you just go down the pub and get another one. Who really cares if the bears eat them when you kick them out?

**zubber** · 24-01-2010, 09:04 PM

of course ,more temptation to slip her a length first thing in the morning in the spoons position .

**SiLeakHunt** · 24-01-2010, 09:09 PM

Originally Posted by patsycat

Try being a woman trying to sleep beside a snoring, farting, runs în his sleep sort.

I tend to follow through after farting does that impact negatively on your rest ?

Cheers

**Norton** · 24-01-2010, 09:10 PM

Originally Posted by Panda

Who really cares if the bears eat them when you kick them out?

Sleep alone 100% chance the bear going to eat you. Sleep with her you got a 50/50 chance.

**robuzo** · 24-01-2010, 09:47 PM

Milan Kundera, in "Unbearable Lightness":
"Making love with a woman and sleeping with a woman are two separate passions, not merely different but opposite. Love does not make itself felt in the desire for copulation (a desire that extends to an infinite number of women) but in the desire for shared sleep (a desire limited to one woman)."

**britmaveric** · 24-01-2010, 09:57 PM

Well I tend to get bed migration - Missus literally pushes me off the bed. I switch sides and she migrates the other way. This is on a king size bed no less. I think its more about wanting to snuggle, but it gets way too hot for that.

**nikster** · 24-01-2010, 10:58 PM

Originally Posted by Slipstream

Everyones different, some folk sleep well together, some don't. It depends on the connection they both have.

I think it's even simpler than that, some girls just like to snuggle and some don't. Connection has nothing to do with that - you find out the first night. It ranges from "must be as close as possible at all times" to "can't sleep with somebody else in the room, let alone the same bed".

I guess it's the same with guys though I don't have experience with that

personally I am fine with either.

My theory was that some grew up sleeping in the bed with their parents and siblings - those are the ones who like to snuggle - and some grew up in their own beds. But I could be wrong of course...

I also have no preference which side of the bed I am sleeping on... we have an infant so now the logistics of mom getting to the baby quickly are the deciding factor.

**patsycat** · 24-01-2010, 10:58 PM

I hate spooning.

**S Landreth** · 25-01-2010, 04:00 AM

Originally Posted by britmaveric

Well I tend to get bed migration.........

Encroachment is a Problem!

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