Thread: Greedy, Vulgar & Tacky - Meet David Beckham

Lying seductively back on white silk sheets, legs akimbo, wearing naught but his skimpy undies, David Beckham's new poster ad is not so much 'Hello Boys' as 'Hello Sailors'.

But unlike Eva Herzigova, who, to the delight of both men and women, launched a generation of wonderfully enhanced cleavages, Beckham looks, well, just tacky. Quite an achievement for a man with his undeniable good looks.



While many people will simply dismiss this image as little more than gay erotica - it is clearly & cynically, designed to appeal as much to gay men as to women - I would suggest that this is a new low point in the vulgerisation of so much of modern life.

But then what else should we expect from the man who, along with his wife, has done as much as any modern celebrity to destroy the value placed by our society on self-respect and self-restraint.

Why should Beckham's private parts - for this is what it is really all about - be shoved into the nation's face for cheap commercial gain?

It betrays such an absence of imagination to think the only way you can be attractive to the opposite sex - or, indeed, your own - is to parade yourself like a goodtime girl (or, in this case, guy) in an Amsterdam shop front.

What hypocrisy for Giorgio Armani to say the reason he chose David Beckham was because he 'represents a notion of modern masculinity: as a sports hero, husband and father'.

As a sportsman, Beckham was always narcissistic, as famous for his hairstyles as his goals; more tantrums than talent.

As a husband, his wandering eye is legendary. The only person in denial over that is his wife Victoria, because she knows just how much adverse publicity can damage the earning capacity of Brand Beckham.

As a father, despite his protestations of devotion, he is away from his kids more than he's with them, pursuing his fame and his millions.

What kind of a father - of three boys - exposes himself draped across the world's billboards in his posing pouch, looking like the male equivalent of a Page Three tart?

It's one thing when these images are of anonymous metrosexual models; quite another when they're your dad.

There's the rub. Beckham didn't have to do this advert. He doesn't need the money, or the exposure (no pun intended). But - like his wife - he loves the fame. He loves to be talked about and desired. And he doesn't care by whom.

Now, it would be easy to blame the sublimely superficial Posh - the woman who put the 'ick' into acrylic - for turning a good boy bad.

But Beckham's vanity was always greater than his not inconsiderable talents as a footballer. Posh was merely the Miracle Grow poured on his ego.

They truly were soulmates: greedy, ambitious and desperate to be noticed.

That's one of the saddest things about these posters. We'd become accustomed to his wife desperately seeking publicity.

The biggest decisions in her life are not how to bring up the boys, or what kind of wife she should be, or how to develop her talents, but how to keep in the media spotlight.

Every day a new frock, a new look. Her character has become as thin as those stick legs, her personality as fake as those silicone breasts.

And now Mr Beckham is revealed as being just as shallow. Perhaps if this was just Becks being Becks and grinning for the camera once again, like some cheesy catalogue model, I wouldn't care so much.

But this image does matter, because Beckham is the figurehead for a modern culture that increasingly embraces crudeness and vulgarity.

Vulgarity is spending £50,000 on a single watch. Or shouting and swearing in the face of a referee.

Or, in the case of his wife, strutting around in tiny dresses which would make a streetwalker blush.

All of these things matter because they are witnessed by a younger generation for whom the Beckhams are icons of consumerism and fame.

The couple are the torchbearers of the New Vulgarians - people for whom brains, wit, education, goodness and hard work mean nothing.

All they want is a short cut to fame and fortune.

And there is no shorter cut to burnishing that fame and fortune than for a fading sports star and father of three young boys to prostrate himself, nearly naked, on the altar of tawdry celebrity, for a few more millions and a few more moments in the limelight.

The awful thing is you can see that Beckham truly loves it, just as he truly loves himself. This is narcissism made flesh.

But that's what you are left with, at the end of your career, when all that has ever really mattered is how things look. Self-love thrives when superficiality is supreme.

Can you imagine for a moment sporting stars such as Lewis Hamilton or Jonny Wilkinson - never mind the giants of the past such as Denis Compton, Bobby Moore or Bobby Charlton - posing in a pouch like this, with their legs thrust apart, however many millions they were offered to demean themselves?

Not on your life. Their talent speaks for itself.

You can't help but wonder what Beckham's new heavyweight Hollywood friends will make of his new status as poster pants icon.
Tom Cruise, for all his faults, and Will Smith are serious movers and shakers, powerful men in one of the richest & most cut-throat businesses in the world.

It is inconceivable that either of them would strip off and pose like some gay teenage wannabe desperate to break into acting.

That is what's really sad about all this. At this point in Beckham's career (he's only 32) and having acquired huge wealth, it's time to be making the right decisions for his and his family's future.

To grow into an elder statesmen for his sport.

Lots of sportsmen do that - especially ones like Beckham who have had a place in the nation's heart. Instead, he poses almost naked, more Jordan than Samson.

Heaven knows what the tough guys at LA Galaxy, the football team he signed up with for a reported £128 million (for whom he has played only a handful of times), will make of their pouting soft porn star. Beckham's dwindling band of footie fans can at least be happy to know that if they want a glimpse of what their hero is made of, they can drive downtown and see the British boy wonder in all his glory, 20 feet high on a billboard.

Airbrushed and two-dimensional, it is truly an image that reflects the man.

Yes, I think that if I was his Mother, I would be ashamed to admit it. That or change my name, die my hair and move elsewhere. Does the man not realise what effect that this will have on his poor children? Pobably not, he simply does not care. He must be in the news, constantly, for any reason, good or bad. Poor, sad, vain little man, albeit with photoshop'd nuts.

I don't mind Beckham, he seems like an alright guy so I gotta take a couple of points up here.

Why should Beckham's private parts - for this is what it is really all about - be shoved into the nation's face for cheap commercial gain?

Well it's his parts or some other models isn't it?

As a sportsman, Beckham was always narcissistic, as famous for his hairstyles as his goals; more tantrums than talent.

More tantrums than talent? How can this not go undisputed, the guy is one of the most talented footballers that we have seen.

As a father, despite his protestations of devotion, he is away from his kids more than he's with them, pursuing his fame and his millions.

So he works away from home like so many fathers do. He's also earning huge money that will benefit his kids to no end.

It's one thing when these images are of anonymous metrosexual models; quite another when they're your dad.

Well a lot of male models are fathers. Is this a complaint against parents being underwear models?

There's the rub. Beckham didn't have to do this advert. He doesn't need the money, or the exposure (no pun intended). But - like his wife - he loves the fame.

He's making hay whilst the sun shines isn't he? Not gonna be doing much modelling or playing football when he's 50 yrs old.

They truly were soulmates: greedy, ambitious and desperate to be noticed.

I would guess most people that made it 'big' in whatever field have some greed and and a lot of ambition, not necessarily bad qualities.

And now Mr Beckham is revealed as being just as shallow. Perhaps if this was just Becks being Becks and grinning for the camera once again, like some cheesy catalogue model, I wouldn't care so much.

But this image does matter, because Beckham is the figurehead for a modern culture that increasingly embraces crudeness and vulgarity.

Would you complain so much about female underwear models? This is a modern culture, this is a standard photo, if it wasn't for more risque pics like this coming out over the years (all receiving similar complaints no doubt) then we would never have pics of any models in their underwear/showing too much flesh to this day. It's progressive isn't it?

The couple are the torchbearers of the New Vulgarians - people for whom brains, wit, education, goodness and hard work mean nothing.

To say Beckham has not worked hard to get where he is today is just silly talk. I doubt any of us have put as much time and work into our careers.

But that's what you are left with, at the end of your career, when all that has ever really mattered is how things look.

I think if you asked Becks what has been the most important part of his career he would say playing football for England. Think that has mattered to him much more than how he looks.

That is what's really sad about all this. At this point in Beckham's career (he's only 32) and having acquired huge wealth, it's time to be making the right decisions for his and his family's future.

Making more money seems to be the right decision for most 32 year olds with a family.

I don't honestly see much of a problem with the ad myself. Good luck to the guy.

Originally Posted by Loombucket

if I was his Mother, I would be ashamed to admit it. That or change my name, die my hair and move elsewhere.

Are you kidding? The visa is in the works and mum will be living in Santa Monica within the year. Of course she'll retain her British citizenship for a few years until dear Davey and his Issan (sorry) Spicy wife decide to stay, then she'll dutifully follow suit.

Apologies, my waterboarding/geography handbag is twisted bout my head and neck, not thinking straight.





still likely.

Come on, get it if and whilst you can. It's the American dream.

I think your rip-offs should be attributed SO
we know you like Beckams bulge

Originally Posted by chinthee

Come on, get it if and whilst you can. It's the American dream.

Very unAmerican ... twat. Where you from boy? Manchester? And I don't mean New Hampshire.

This guy did the same shit and became one of Hollywood's biggest and richest stars.



*Mark Wahlberg for those of you on life support.

Startin' to wonder about you Chinners.

First the "thais got big knobs."

Now the posting of sexy boys sporting (soft) wood.

^Sexually confused eh? Heh Heh... No, I just like hollywood, and was in the biz a bit too.

Originally Posted by Texpat

Originally Posted by chinthee

Come on, get it if and whilst you can. It's the American dream.

Very unAmerican ... twat. Where you from boy? Manchester? And I don't mean New Hampshire.

Katote na krup. I live longtime in farang countries and Bratet Thai. You want shortime big boy?

If I was Beckham, I think I'd take the money too.
Lets face it, he's at the end of his sporting career, he has no personality and pitiful brains.
Yet people are willing to throw this much money in his general direction. Why not.
It won't jeopardise his Nobel prize or anything.

A few weeks back I watched his wife VB come out of E and O in Notting Hill, London.

She's obviously called up some paps to get pics of her leaving, spending a good 5 minutes posing as she got into the car and then as she sat for pics in the back.

Apparently the interest was to do with her new hairstyle.

At least hookers retain their anonymity when they loose their self respect!

He's a virtual netballer now.

Earning 30mil quid. (just made that up, likely more)

Who cares? Really, by publishing this article they're falling into the trap of giving him the very publicity they complain he's after.

At least Becks can do something - play soccer (so I'm told, but don't know shit 'bout that).


But his air-head wife!?? What's she good for? Shopping?

She's a talented singer and performer.

Maybe you're right - just like Princess Di was a nuclear physicist.

Originally Posted by chinthee

Mark Wahlberg for those of you on life support.

I honestly have no idea who he is.

^Did you see the remake a few years ago called the 'Italian Job?' He starred in that along with Charlize Theron. He's also starred in lots of big hits and is one of Hollywood's top money earners now.