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  1. #1
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    Stephen Fry slammed for saying child abuse victims shouldn't feel 'self pity'

    Speaking in an interview with Dave Rubin on the Rubin Report last week, the 58-year-old referred to people who had an "uncle touch them in that nasty place" and said he has "no sympathy" for them.

    The Sherlock star, who himself is an advocate for mental illness, made the shocking remarks while discussing the depletion of free speech, which he argued has lead to people avoiding “trigger words” to steer away from controversy.

    “We fear that it’s going to happen more and more because America leads and Britain follows in all kinds of ways,” the former QI presenter said.

    “I think it started to happen in Britain with the attempted removal of statues of people who are considered unlikable – who were once beloved – and have become in a very 1984 way, ‘unpersons’.”

    It’s a great shame and we’re all very sorry that your uncle touched you in that nasty place – you get some of my sympathy – but your self pity gets none of my sympathy

    The writer then vented that people need to grow up if they can’t “bear complexity”.

    He continued: “The ideas that things aren’t easy to understand. They want to be told, or they want to be able to decide and say, this is good, and this is bad, and anything that conflicts with that is not to be borne.”

    Attacking audiences for becoming too sensitive, he fumed: “There are many great plays which contain rapes, and the word rape now is even considered a rape. They’re terrible things and they have to be thought about, clearly, but if you say you can’t watch this play, you can’t watch Titus Andronicus, you can’t read it in an English class, or you can’t watch Macbeth because it’s got children being killed in it, it might trigger something when you were young that upset you once, because uncle touched you in a nasty place, well I’m sorry.

    He continued: “It’s a great shame and we’re all very sorry that your uncle touched you in that nasty place – you get some of my sympathy – but your self pity gets none of my sympathy.

    “Self pity is the ugliest emotion in humanity. Get rid of it, because no one’s going to like you if you feel sorry for yourself. The irony is we’ll feel sorry for you, if you stop feeling sorry for yourself. Grow up."

    Unsurprisingly, his comments caused outrage on social media as thousands attacked the ‘national treasure’ over his “jaw-dropping insensitivity”.


    Comments
    “I used to have so much respect for Stephen Fry for his battle with mental illness and speaking openly about it. Now, I'm disgusted,” vented one enraged former fan. Another followed: “Stephen Fry has no sympathy for survivors of child abuse - how the f*** is this man so respected by ppl?"


    This bewildered critic barked: "I think the biggest irritant for me about this Stephen Fry BS fest this morning is that this man is supposed to be a mental illness advocate."

    A fourth person agreed: “"I rather fear Stephen Fry completely undermined his point by telling rape survivors to 'grow up'. Jaw-dropping insensitivity."

    "I knew there was a reason I didn't like Stephen fry, his comments are why victims don't speak out and suffer in silence,” another added.

    Stephen Fry slammed for saying says he has no sympathy for child abuse victims | Celebrity News | Showbiz & TV | Daily Express

  2. #2
    RIP pseudolus's Avatar
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    Fry has all the hallmarks of being one of the BBC pedos.

  3. #3
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    Homosexual queers see nothing wrong in molesting little boys, why would Fry be any different.
    The Uncle will start off touching and will progress to rape.

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    Of course probably taken all out of context by someone who was "offended"

    If I read the above correctly he said he felt sympathy of those abused but but not for the self pity. In other words it is a nasty thing that happened but one has to get on with life.

    Self pity is a state of mind. So "getting back on the horse" is important and not dwelling on the past or the incident maybe the best way forward.

    But as usual the nanny-state beige people don't what to hear inconvenient truths.

    Please take your medal for participating in the human race.
    Better to think inside the pub, than outside the box?
    I apologize if any offence was caused. unless it was intended.
    You people, you think I know feck nothing; I tell you: I know feck all
    Those who cannot change their mind, cannot change anything.

  5. #5
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    Ouch. How to get railroaded. He said he had sympathy for the victims, but not for their "self pity".

    Enormous difference. Sadly Fry should have realized by now that people are generally stupid and cannot cope with subtle distinctions.

  6. #6
    Molecular Mixup
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    No chance of that faggot being the first BBC worker to come forward and tell what he knows about that sick organization then .

    Here with its young bum chum
    27 years old but looks childish . perfect for the sicko


  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by pseudolus View Post
    Fry has all the hallmarks of being one of the BBC pedos.
    My guess too.

  8. #8
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    Fry's comment about being touched up by an uncle as being of little consequence is bit gauche to say the least.

    He, for one, should be aware that self-pity is a consequence of trauma and not to be disregarded in helping victims overcome their depression and guilt after being abused.

    It's sad, really that Fry's seemingly entering an age where he's becoming more than a little socially myopic and loose-lipped, offending even his friends.

  9. #9
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    I don't really see what he is getting at.

    If you feel sympathy for someone who suffered sexual abuse then you feel sympathy for them.

    Self pity is probably part of the natural cycle of emotions you will go through if you have been harmed in this way.

    Hopefully you will get over that stage eventually and be able to manage the memory in a more construcive way but I don't see what is so wrong with a measure of self pity that it is worth attacking.

    I think Fry was raped as a school boy so I guess he has gone through the cycle of emotions and is proud to be able to say that he no longers feels self pity but I don't see the point of putting other victims down for going through that emotion even if they get stuck there for longer than he did.

    Maybe he is a bit jealous of the way today's victims get more sympathetic consideration from society than they did 50 years ago.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by wasabi View Post
    Homosexual queers see nothing wrong in molesting little boys, why would Fry be any different.
    The Uncle will start off touching and will progress to rape.
    As is the case with the heterosexual persuasion, whom make up the clear majority of paedophile sociopathy.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Looper View Post

    Self pity is ....part of the natural cycle of emotion... if ... harmed .....

    I don't see what is so wrong with a measure of self pity that it is worth attacking.

    I think Fry was raped as a school boy so I guess he has gone through the cycle of emotions and is proud to be able to say that he no longers feels self pity but I don't see the point of putting other victims down for going through that emotion even if they get stuck there for longer than he did.

    Maybe he is a bit jealous of the way today's victims get more sympathetic consideration from society than they did 50 years ago.
    Something along those lines could well be the case.

  12. #12
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    Nothing here, as pointed out by some folks that actually read the article...

    His comments were reasonable and empathetic, but were reported out of context and with misleading headlines and wording. The usual trash reporting... I'll add that I don't particularly like Fry, but he does talk sense sometimes and did nothing wrong here.

    Actually, the responses just underline his initial position: the PC discourse is dehumanizing over-reactive nanny-state BS, and too many people jump on the bandwagon without actually listening to comments, thinking about them then making contextualized intelligent comment...
    Cycling should be banned!!!

  13. #13
    Thailand Expat harrybarracuda's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ENT View Post
    Fry's comment about being touched up by an uncle as being of little consequence is bit gauche to say the least.

    He, for one, should be aware that self-pity is a consequence of trauma and not to be disregarded in helping victims overcome their depression and guilt after being abused.

    It's sad, really that Fry's seemingly entering an age where he's becoming more than a little socially myopic and loose-lipped, offending even his friends.
    Perhaps his guilt got to him.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by ENT
    The writer then vented that people need to grow up if they can’t “bear complexity”.
    He's exactly right. Many people today, from all parts of the spectrum, see things only in black and white or conflate complexity with confusion leading to a childish belief in conspiracy theories, pseudoscience, pseudo-history, extraordinary levels of self-righteous entitlement, and the kind of fictional gibberish peddled by people like Dan Brown. If this was the 12th century many of these people would be venerating Saint's bones. Today the same ignorant peasant mindset tends towards believing that colloidal silver cures all illnesses and that governments blow up buildings so that they can lock their citizens in concentration camps. Confusion instead of complexity. Even something as small as this thread displays it, with the binary simpletons shouting "queer" and the complexly confused trapped in an overanylitical spiralling towards their own navels.

  15. #15
    A Cockless Wonder
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    Quote Originally Posted by DrB0b
    Saint's bones
    Saints' bones

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Looper View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by DrB0b
    Saint's bones
    Saints' bones
    How do you know how many Saints I was talking about

  17. #17
    Excommunicated baldrick's Avatar
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    because no one’s going to like you if you feel sorry for yourself.
    but the doctor will proscribe you lots of funny drugs

  18. #18
    Molecular Mixup
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    Quote Originally Posted by Looper
    I think Fry was raped as a school boy so I guess he has gone through the cycle of emotions and is proud to be able to say that he no longers feels self pity but I don't see the point of putting other victims down for going through that emotion even if they get stuck there for longer than he did.
    Fry obviously has not got over his own abuse, if the only way he found to deal with it was to let homosexuality invade him; so he should be the last person to lecture on the subject.

    No doubt the PC mob here will say he was destined to be a homo anyway and the abuse a coincidence ...

  19. #19
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    Shit happens in life. Lots of shit. Bad shit, horrible shit. It is part of being alive. Dealing with it is one thing. Wallowing in self pity for the rest of your life is another thing.

    It is not all flowers and puppies. Realizing that is part of being an adult.

  20. #20
    Thailand Expat harrybarracuda's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by baldrick View Post
    because no one’s going to like you if you feel sorry for yourself.
    but the doctor will proscribe you lots of funny drugs
    Or do you mean prescribe?


  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by harrybarracuda View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by baldrick View Post
    because no one’s going to like you if you feel sorry for yourself.
    but the doctor will proscribe you lots of funny drugs
    Or do you mean prescribe?

    Sadly these days proscribe is about right when it comes to getting anything that's worth having frim a western doctor. Back to buying online from dodgy Chinese labs.

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by nidhogg
    Dealing with it is one thing. Wallowing in self pity for the rest of your life is another thing.
    Some self pity is a natural part of the recovery cycle from trauma like child sexual abuse.

    It does not necessarily mean 'wallowing in it for the rest of your life'.

    Some self pity in the short term is part of the process of 'dealing with it'.

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by ENT
    The Sherlock star, who himself is an advocate for mental illness
    I doubt that. An advocate for treatment maybe but I somehow doubt he's encouraging people to become mentally ill.

  24. #24
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    I agree with him. Whatever horrific trauma a person goes through. Self pity is not the way out of it. Self pity will only, perhaps, make the trauma even greater than it was.

    Getting professional help, even decades later, is the only way.

    It's like, if you listen to a friend go on and on and on about one little thing in their life. And every conversation is about that same subject. You eventually give up trying to help - that person turns to self pity. Because the only person who will listen is themself.

    And, Blue, your homophobic comments are getting a bit old.

  25. #25
    Excommunicated baldrick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by patsycat
    go on and on and on about one little thing in their life
    Quote Originally Posted by patsycat
    Blue, your homophobic comments are getting a bit old
    it is self pity

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