Drunk man tries to have sex with postbox in Stoke

[Chittychangchang]

A drunk man has been caught trying to have sex with a postbox in the middle of a shopping arcade.

Paul Bennett, 45, was spotted walking towards the postbox with his trousers down at Scholes Precinct in Stoke.

He then rubbed himself against the postbox while holding his hands in the air and shouting “wow”.

After completing the act he pulled his trousers up and started swinging on a lamppost.

An eye-witness called police and he was arrested.

Bennett, of Holborn Avenue, Stoke, pleaded guilty to two counts of indecent exposure and using threatening and abusive words with abusive behaviour at Stoke Magistrates Court.



Drunk man tries to have sex with postbox in Wigan | Granada - ITV News

[kingwilly]

Already gotta Fred about dis bloke

[BaitongBoy]

^Two new lodgers?...Heh...

[withnallstoke]

In Stoke, they don't "try" to have sex with postboxes.

They succeed.




Wigan = Amateurs.

[Pragmatic]

The similarity is uncanny.

[BaitongBoy]

That box is a beauty, indeed...

What kind of fooking beer goggles was he wearing?...

[withnallstoke]

[Hans Mann]

That's the Stoke version of a mail order bride, yes.

[withnallstoke]

That's the Stoke version of a mail order bride, yes.

Do they come in the post?

[Hans Mann]

^Only if the stamps are licked.

[BaitongBoy]

He came ON the mail...

[Gazza]

mmmmm...nice box.

So what if the guy likes a little male-on-mail action.

I wanna know if he had a post-coital ciggie afterwards.

[withnallstoke]

Just noticed it's an old post box. (George V).

Sick bastard.

[thaimeme]

They must be proud....

[Seekingasylum]

Is he really 45?

Shagging post boxes must really take it out of you.

God knows what he was doing when there two deliveries daily. Shot his load and still had to make 1700 hrs pick up. Poor fucker.

[Looper]

The slot is 4 or 5 feet off the ground.

Must be an athlete - 1st class effort

[BaitongBoy]

^That's "her" mouth, Looper...Perhaps there's a wee hole round the back...

[KEVIN2008]

Man accused of having sex with Shetland pony smelled 'strongly of horses'
Tuesday 27th January 2015

● CRIME WORLDBy Shuki Byrne

Neighbours allegedly spotted the man leading the animals into a dark wooded area

A man in the UK was found 'sweating profusely' and smelling 'strongly of horses' when approached by police, a court has heard.

'Sexual deviant' Alan Barnfield was found ‘sweating profusely and smelled strongly of horses’ when he was found by police officers at Oak Tree Stables on Rakes Lane, Loversall, Doncaster.

Worried neighbours who spotted the 44-year-old called police after thinking the individual was going to steal two ponies in August of 2012.

He was allegedly acting suspicious before being witnessed putting something around the neck of a Shetland pony and leading the two animals to a dark wooded area.

Prosecutor Louise Reevell said: "It is at this time the prosecution say that intercourse took place out of sight in a dark wooded area at the end of the paddock."

Police arrived at the scene and searched Barfield's rucksack, looking for items he might have used to commit theft.

They found several cans of Lynx deodorant, a length of white electrical cable, a handheld water sprayer, a cloth, a metal dog chain and two bottles of Lucozade, the court heard.

Barfield, of Hexthorpe Lane, Hexthorpe, Doncaster, told police he was 'just out walking' and denies any sexual intercourse with the animal.

Miss Reevell said the next day owner Jodie Walton inspected her ponies and found Sky - her Shetland Pony - appeared to be in discomfort.

A vet was called out and an examination conducted.

Horse DNA was found on a sample taken from Barfield, who had bestiality images and films on his mobile phone, the Star reports.

The trial continues.

Man accused of sex with Shetland pony smelled 'strongly of horses / Sunday World

[KEVIN2008]

Bestiality is never a laughing matter, unless of course you’re making love to a hyena..

[Topper]

You fuck just one horse, just one and they'll call you a horse fucker for life....

[Bettyboo]

They found several cans of Lynx deodorant

In this case:

[klong toey]

As i am one of the lucky few in the UK having i Thai wife i do not have the dilemma of choosing between a farang woman or a postbox to relieve any sexual tension.
But given the choice i backing this man's judgement the postbox is a sexy looking object of desire.
Compared with the native female inhabitants.

[Hans Mann]

Man accused of having sex with Shetland pony

So, is he mentally unstable, or does he only have a stable mentality?

[BaitongBoy]

You fuck just one horse, just one and they'll call you a horse fucker for life....

Funny how that works...