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  1. #1
    Utopian Expat Chittychangchang's Avatar
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    Drunk man tries to have sex with postbox in Stoke

    A drunk man has been caught trying to have sex with a postbox in the middle of a shopping arcade.

    Paul Bennett, 45, was spotted walking towards the postbox with his trousers down at Scholes Precinct in Stoke.

    He then rubbed himself against the postbox while holding his hands in the air and shouting “wow”.

    After completing the act he pulled his trousers up and started swinging on a lamppost.

    An eye-witness called police and he was arrested.

    Bennett, of Holborn Avenue, Stoke, pleaded guilty to two counts of indecent exposure and using threatening and abusive words with abusive behaviour at Stoke Magistrates Court.



    Drunk man tries to have sex with postbox in Wigan | Granada - ITV News

  2. #2
    Thailand Expat
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    Already gotta Fred about dis bloke

  3. #3
    Thailand Expat

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    ^Two new lodgers?...Heh...

  4. #4
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
    withnallstoke's Avatar
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    In Stoke, they don't "try" to have sex with postboxes.

    They succeed.




    Wigan = Amateurs.

  5. #5
    Thailand Expat Pragmatic's Avatar
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    The similarity is uncanny.
    Quote Originally Posted by Chittychangchang View Post


  6. #6
    Thailand Expat

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    That box is a beauty, indeed...

    What kind of fooking beer goggles was he wearing?...

  7. #7
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
    withnallstoke's Avatar
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  8. #8
    Thailand Expat
    Hans Mann's Avatar
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    That's the Stoke version of a mail order bride, yes.

  9. #9
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
    withnallstoke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hans Mann
    That's the Stoke version of a mail order bride, yes.
    Do they come in the post?

  10. #10
    Thailand Expat
    Hans Mann's Avatar
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    ^Only if the stamps are licked.

  11. #11
    Thailand Expat

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    He came ON the mail...

  12. #12
    Thailand Expat
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    mmmmm...nice box.

    So what if the guy likes a little male-on-mail action.

    I wanna know if he had a post-coital ciggie afterwards.


  13. #13
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
    withnallstoke's Avatar
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    Just noticed it's an old post box. (George V).

    Sick bastard.

  14. #14
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    They must be proud....

  15. #15
    Thailand Expat

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    Is he really 45?

    Shagging post boxes must really take it out of you.

    God knows what he was doing when there two deliveries daily. Shot his load and still had to make 1700 hrs pick up. Poor fucker.

  16. #16
    Balls to Monty
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    The slot is 4 or 5 feet off the ground.

    Must be an athlete - 1st class effort

  17. #17
    Thailand Expat

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    ^That's "her" mouth, Looper...Perhaps there's a wee hole round the back...

  18. #18
    Thailand Expat KEVIN2008's Avatar
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    Man accused of having sex with Shetland pony smelled 'strongly of horses'
    Tuesday 27th January 2015

    ● CRIME WORLDBy Shuki Byrne

    Neighbours allegedly spotted the man leading the animals into a dark wooded area

    A man in the UK was found 'sweating profusely' and smelling 'strongly of horses' when approached by police, a court has heard.

    'Sexual deviant' Alan Barnfield was found ‘sweating profusely and smelled strongly of horses’ when he was found by police officers at Oak Tree Stables on Rakes Lane, Loversall, Doncaster.

    Worried neighbours who spotted the 44-year-old called police after thinking the individual was going to steal two ponies in August of 2012.

    He was allegedly acting suspicious before being witnessed putting something around the neck of a Shetland pony and leading the two animals to a dark wooded area.

    Prosecutor Louise Reevell said: "It is at this time the prosecution say that intercourse took place out of sight in a dark wooded area at the end of the paddock."

    Police arrived at the scene and searched Barfield's rucksack, looking for items he might have used to commit theft.

    They found several cans of Lynx deodorant, a length of white electrical cable, a handheld water sprayer, a cloth, a metal dog chain and two bottles of Lucozade, the court heard.

    Barfield, of Hexthorpe Lane, Hexthorpe, Doncaster, told police he was 'just out walking' and denies any sexual intercourse with the animal.

    Miss Reevell said the next day owner Jodie Walton inspected her ponies and found Sky - her Shetland Pony - appeared to be in discomfort.

    A vet was called out and an examination conducted.

    Horse DNA was found on a sample taken from Barfield, who had bestiality images and films on his mobile phone, the Star reports.

    The trial continues.

    Man accused of sex with Shetland pony smelled 'strongly of horses / Sunday World

  19. #19
    Thailand Expat KEVIN2008's Avatar
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    Bestiality is never a laughing matter, unless of course you’re making love to a hyena..

  20. #20
    Custom Title Changer
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    You fuck just one horse, just one and they'll call you a horse fucker for life....

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by KEVIN2008
    They found several cans of Lynx deodorant








    In this case:


  22. #22
    Thailand Expat klong toey's Avatar
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    As i am one of the lucky few in the UK having i Thai wife i do not have the dilemma of choosing between a farang woman or a postbox to relieve any sexual tension.
    But given the choice i backing this man's judgement the postbox is a sexy looking object of desire.
    Compared with the native female inhabitants.
    Fascists dress in black and go around telling people what to do, whereas priests... more drink!

  23. #23
    Thailand Expat
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    Man accused of having sex with Shetland pony
    So, is he mentally unstable, or does he only have a stable mentality?


  24. #24
    Thailand Expat

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    Quote Originally Posted by CSFFan
    You fuck just one horse, just one and they'll call you a horse fucker for life....
    Funny how that works...

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