The Thailand Forum

The Thailand expat forum for Travel, Lifestyle and Fun.



Welcome to the TeakDoor.com The Thailand Forum.

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view some discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us

TeakDoor Advertising Rates

Forum Home Donate Arcade Chat Room Gallery Property Mark Forums Read
Go Back   TeakDoor.com - The Thailand Forum > Non Asia Travel Forums > UK Travel Forum
Home Register TD Links FAQ Members List Calendar Weather Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

UK Travel Forum Your Travels in England, Scotland, Wales, Ireland and the few other odd little Islands that Great Britain are left with.

Thai Dating  Savile Row Fashion Bangkok

Middle east weather forecasts  Europe weather forecasts  Africa weather forecasts  South America weather forecasts

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 05-10-2013, 08:35 PM   #1 (permalink)
splendid and tremendous
 
somtamslap's Avatar
 
Last Online: Yesterday 09:06 PM
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Down on the farm
Posts: 11,028
somtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expat
Slap's guide to international lavatory behaviour





Ye Old British Defecation Decorum
1. Employ several sheets of 3-ply toilet tissue to conduct, what should be due to sanitised kitchen conditions, a minimal mop-up

2. Utilise the Smart Sensor System in order to expel the offending dietary residue. A flush unhindered by other people’s 10-year-old piss, shit, semen and sick can be effortlessly executed

3. If the previous evening’s fare comprised a large doner kebab and 15 pints of ale, make use of the provided toilet brush in empathy of the next visitor

4. Exit the cubical and attend the abundance of pristine basins for a thorough application of soap courtesy of the sterilised dispenser

5. With either the paper hand towels or compressed air furnishing, dry your hands to complete a textbook trip to the bathroom




Asian Restroom Etiquette

Shit all over the fucking place. Wipe your arse with your hand. Fiddle with your hair in the mirror for half an hour. Fuck off back to your bowl of boiled rice


somtamslap is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Gods of Thailand
Advertise here!
Bangkok Escort
Old 05-10-2013, 08:52 PM   #2 (permalink)
Lord of Swine
 
Necron99's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Nahkon Sawon
Posts: 11,032
Necron99 Thailand ExpatNecron99 Thailand ExpatNecron99 Thailand ExpatNecron99 Thailand ExpatNecron99 Thailand ExpatNecron99 Thailand ExpatNecron99 Thailand ExpatNecron99 Thailand ExpatNecron99 Thailand ExpatNecron99 Thailand ExpatNecron99 Thailand Expat
indian toilet behavior.

What is being (fucking annoying head wobbling) this toilet you are speaking to of..
Necron99 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 09:05 PM   #3 (permalink)
Thailand Expat
 
klong toey's Avatar
 
Last Online: Today 09:50 AM
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 3,376
klong toey Thailand Expatklong toey Thailand Expatklong toey Thailand Expatklong toey Thailand Expatklong toey Thailand Expatklong toey Thailand Expatklong toey Thailand Expatklong toey Thailand Expatklong toey Thailand Expatklong toey Thailand Expatklong toey Thailand Expat
I love those country toilets but in the city of Bangkok we have Terminal 21 powered by Toto,not the dog the Japanese toilet company.Video a bit naff but you get the idea.


klong toey is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 09:06 PM   #4 (permalink)
splendid and tremendous
 
somtamslap's Avatar
 
Last Online: Yesterday 09:06 PM
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Down on the farm
Posts: 11,028
somtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expat
Quote:
Originally Posted by Necron99
indian toilet behavior.
Looks alright.

"Would you like your good bottom wiping, sir?"

somtamslap is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 09:07 PM   #5 (permalink)
splendid and tremendous
 
somtamslap's Avatar
 
Last Online: Yesterday 09:06 PM
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Down on the farm
Posts: 11,028
somtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expat
Quote:
Originally Posted by klong toey
I love those country toilets but in the city of Bangkok we have Terminal 21 powered by Toto,not the dog the Japanese toilet company.
I want one. Yesterday.
somtamslap is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 09:18 PM   #6 (permalink)
Is not a Dj
 
DJ Pat's Avatar
 
Last Online: 13-08-2014 02:38 PM
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 9,646
DJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand Expat
Send a message via MSN to DJ Pat
I say the one thing keeping western toilet cleanliness in the dark ages is the lack of bum sprays.

Dry toilet paper wiping shit into your skin. Disgusting. Luckily in my place I've adapted a shower system with warm water. I save on toilet paper and showers, because I know my arse is always pristine.
__________________
When I was in America a guy told me to 'have a nice day' but I didn't, so I sued him
DJ Pat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 09:27 PM   #7 (permalink)
splendid and tremendous
 
somtamslap's Avatar
 
Last Online: Yesterday 09:06 PM
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Down on the farm
Posts: 11,028
somtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expat
Quote:
Originally Posted by DJ Pat
I say the one thing keeping western toilet cleanliness in the dark ages is the lack of bum sprays.
I say you're right. A good arse gun is better than any bog roll in the world.
somtamslap is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 09:27 PM   #8 (permalink)
Member
 
Gilbert's Avatar
 
Last Online: 01-10-2014 07:11 AM
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 742
Gilbert Thailand ExpatGilbert Thailand ExpatGilbert Thailand ExpatGilbert Thailand ExpatGilbert Thailand ExpatGilbert Thailand ExpatGilbert Thailand ExpatGilbert Thailand ExpatGilbert Thailand ExpatGilbert Thailand ExpatGilbert Thailand Expat
It is annoying here when places do not have a bum gun, or better still, and Japanese autotoilet2000. You get used to such things and then suddenly the cretins at Central think that the locals can get by without one. Daft fools.
Gilbert is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 09:41 PM   #9 (permalink)
Banned
 
Last Online: 03-06-2014 09:01 PM
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 27,569
Rural Surin Thailand ExpatRural Surin Thailand ExpatRural Surin Thailand ExpatRural Surin Thailand ExpatRural Surin Thailand ExpatRural Surin Thailand ExpatRural Surin Thailand ExpatRural Surin Thailand ExpatRural Surin Thailand ExpatRural Surin Thailand ExpatRural Surin Thailand Expat
Quote:
Originally Posted by somtamslap View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by Necron99
indian toilet behavior.
Looks alright.

"Would you like your good bottom wiping, sir?"

Betchya get a thrill outta that...
Complete strangers too.
Rural Surin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 09:45 PM   #10 (permalink)
Member
 
Last Online: 26-09-2014 08:15 PM
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 400
Ronin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand Expat
Quote:
Originally Posted by DJ Pat View Post
I say the one thing keeping western toilet cleanliness in the dark ages is the lack of bum sprays.

Dry toilet paper wiping shit into your skin. Disgusting. Luckily in my place I've adapted a shower system with warm water. I save on toilet paper and showers, because I know my arse is always pristine.
I agree but you should see the attitude of people in the UK and in London do your best to avoid public toilets unless they have an attendant although non-attended ones are not so common these days.
Ronin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 09:46 PM   #11 (permalink)
Member
 
Last Online: 26-09-2014 08:15 PM
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 400
Ronin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand ExpatRonin Thailand Expat
Quote:
I say you're right. A good arse gun is better than any bog roll in the world.
Would save on chopping down trees but then Andrex wouldn't make a profit.
Ronin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 09:53 PM   #12 (permalink)
Thailand Expat
 
taxexile's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 8,072
taxexile Thailand Expattaxexile Thailand Expattaxexile Thailand Expattaxexile Thailand Expattaxexile Thailand Expattaxexile Thailand Expattaxexile Thailand Expattaxexile Thailand Expattaxexile Thailand Expattaxexile Thailand Expattaxexile Thailand Expat
Quote:
Originally Posted by DJ Pat View Post
I say the one thing keeping western toilet cleanliness in the dark ages is the lack of bum sprays.

Dry toilet paper wiping shit into your skin. Disgusting. Luckily in my place I've adapted a shower system with warm water. I save on toilet paper and showers, because I know my arse is always pristine.
Its all down to efficient crimpage after stool egress.
An anus encumbered with warts, hairs and haemmorrhoids under the control of someone with poor or lazy muscle function will result in poor crimpage and the spreading around of fecal matter.

A good diet also helps to produce a healthy well formed stool that is easily crimped by the anal musculature.

Failing all else, this device might be useful, as can be seen from the before and after photos of the users face. see the second post on this webpage.
http://www.utdforum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69512
taxexile is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 10:02 PM   #13 (permalink)
Thailand Expat
 
Albert Shagnastier's Avatar
 
Last Online: 01-10-2014 08:28 AM
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: City of Angels
Posts: 7,182
Albert Shagnastier Thailand ExpatAlbert Shagnastier Thailand ExpatAlbert Shagnastier Thailand ExpatAlbert Shagnastier Thailand ExpatAlbert Shagnastier Thailand ExpatAlbert Shagnastier Thailand ExpatAlbert Shagnastier Thailand ExpatAlbert Shagnastier Thailand ExpatAlbert Shagnastier Thailand ExpatAlbert Shagnastier Thailand ExpatAlbert Shagnastier Thailand Expat
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ronin View Post
Quote:
I say you're right. A good arse gun is better than any bog roll in the world.
Would save on chopping down trees but then Andrex wouldn't make a profit.
Probably best to invest in the water company at that point
Albert Shagnastier is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 11:07 PM   #14 (permalink)
splendid and tremendous
 
somtamslap's Avatar
 
Last Online: Yesterday 09:06 PM
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Down on the farm
Posts: 11,028
somtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expat
......
somtamslap is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-10-2013, 11:22 PM   #15 (permalink)
splendid and tremendous
 
somtamslap's Avatar
 
Last Online: Yesterday 09:06 PM
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Down on the farm
Posts: 11,028
somtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expatsomtamslap Thailand Expat
Quote:
Originally Posted by taxexile
Its all down to efficient crimpage after stool egress.
And efficient bog roll crumpling.
somtamslap is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-10-2013, 01:54 AM   #16 (permalink)
Thailand Expat
 
charleyboy's Avatar
 
Last Online: Today 07:51 AM
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Cha-am.
Posts: 2,414
charleyboy Thailand Expatcharleyboy Thailand Expatcharleyboy Thailand Expatcharleyboy Thailand Expatcharleyboy Thailand Expatcharleyboy Thailand Expatcharleyboy Thailand Expatcharleyboy Thailand Expatcharleyboy Thailand Expatcharleyboy Thailand Expatcharleyboy Thailand Expat
^ Izal... Also known to Gupta as, brand 'John Wayne' because it takes no shit off Indians!

Last edited by charleyboy : 06-10-2013 at 08:55 AM.
charleyboy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-10-2013, 11:08 AM   #17 (permalink)
Is not a Dj
 
DJ Pat's Avatar
 
Last Online: 13-08-2014 02:38 PM
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 9,646
DJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand ExpatDJ Pat Thailand Expat
Send a message via MSN to DJ Pat
When I crapped at the Emporium toilets where they had no bum guns (so the 'hi-so' shoppers could feel 'inter' I suppose) so had to take a bottle of water in with me so I could at least wet wipe.
DJ Pat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-10-2013, 11:45 AM   #18 (permalink)
Thailand Expat
 
Kurgen's Avatar
 
Last Online: Today 12:52 PM
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Mabprachan
Posts: 5,238
Kurgen Thailand ExpatKurgen Thailand ExpatKurgen Thailand ExpatKurgen Thailand ExpatKurgen Thailand ExpatKurgen Thailand ExpatKurgen Thailand ExpatKurgen Thailand ExpatKurgen Thailand ExpatKurgen Thailand ExpatKurgen Thailand Expat
Donor
It's always a wet wipe when you've got the shits
Kurgen is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-10-2013, 01:27 PM   #19 (permalink)
ความสุขในอีสาน
 
nigelandjan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Frinton on sea and Ban Pak
Posts: 10,311
nigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expat
Quote:
Originally Posted by taxexile
Its all down to efficient crimpage after stool egress.
An anus encumbered with warts, hairs and haemmorrhoids under the control of someone with poor or lazy muscle function will result in poor crimpage and the spreading around of fecal matter.

I would suggest a nice roll of this stored in the fridge overnight to help crimp up the old sphincter .




nigelandjan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-10-2013, 02:53 PM   #20 (permalink)
ความสุขในอีสาน
 
nigelandjan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Frinton on sea and Ban Pak
Posts: 10,311
nigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expatnigelandjan Thailand Expat
Our guest rooms en-suite


nigelandjan is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Register Forum Home Donate FAQ Members List Calendar

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

TeakDoor Advertising Rates

All times are GMT +7. The time now is 01:19 PM.


Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
SEO by vBSEO 3.6.1
Copyright 2005 - 2013 by TeakDoor.com
Page generated in 0.32312 seconds with 22 queries