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  1. #1
    たのむよ。
    The Gentleman Scamp's Avatar
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    Udon Thani - it's shit

    Over the years I have been everywhere in Thailand except for Koh Lanta and that place with all the cunty little monkeys, and though I had been to Udon Thani once before in 2004, I had only been through it in a minibus in a drunken stupor.

    The three of us arrived at Central, which is a mall just like the other Centrals only opposite a massive construction site where they are probably building another fucking mall.

    Walked to the end of the road and it looked like any other place in Thailand North of Bangkok. Nothing outstanding whatsoever, and no sign of Marmite and his midget. At the end of the road on the corner of Central, there is a bog standard intersection with a huge Nok Air billboard.

    This inspired us to go to the airport where there is a rotting 747 on the runway with the engines missing (probably stolen). It was pleasant sitting on the grass under the palms outside the 'Restricted Area' with my two companions but that was about it.

    Landed at Don Muang last night and my right ear still hasn't popped.

  2. #2
    Sprayed On Member
    The Fresh Prince's Avatar
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    Try boiled sweets.

  3. #3
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    DrAndy's Avatar
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    try a long matchstick

  4. #4
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    what a dumb cnut

  5. #5
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    Marmite the Dog's Avatar
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    I see the anti-chav incentives are still effective in Udon Stani.

  6. #6

    R.I.P.


    dirtydog's Avatar
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    Your probably a bit too young for Udon Thani scumpy, give it another 40 years and you might just fit in.

  7. #7
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    coming from central you should have turned left instead of right ..plenty of fun up that way

  8. #8
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    the dogcatcher's Avatar
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    Mr Tongs.
    Hi so hookers.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Gentleman Scamp View Post

    Landed at Don Muang last night and my right ear still hasn't popped.
    Not sure I follow

  10. #10
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    Was waiting for a call that never came. Even lied to the missus that I had a friend. Now that you are jet-setting from UDN to BKK, is Nong Khai too good for you?

  11. #11
    Thailand Expat
    Marmite the Dog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by the dogcatcher
    Mr Tongs. Hi so hookers.
    Did they drive up from Bangkok?

  12. #12
    たのむよ。
    The Gentleman Scamp's Avatar
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    Are the trains still flooding?

  13. #13
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    Aussie Tigger's Avatar
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    Give us advance notice next time Gentleman Scamp when you decide to honour us with your obvious quality presence.We can perhaps arrange a ticker tape parade for such a learned traveller as you seem not to be.What did you freaking expect to find in the middle of the day, Go Go girls outside Central with a Welcome GS banner. I can only assume you posted the thread to stir up some shite,Udon is not for everyone and obviously you fall into that category.

  14. #14
    FarangRed
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    It's shite anyway all these farang walking around pushing prams and Toyota Vigo's with red plates on

  15. #15
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    Was in Udon last week for a night and had a bit off a laugh.
    Started off at the Irish place with a 150bt full brekkie and a pint of the black stuff for about 170bt or something.
    Finished up and booked into a 350bt a night place that would cost at least 800 in Bangkok.
    Made my way to the place that looks like an aircraft hanger with 20 or so bars in it and played some pool and drunk my 60bt tigers.
    Walked out of the hanger and turned left. Walked to the end of the street and had a few (yes 60bt tigers) beers there and then decided to head back to the aircraft hanger place again.
    It was now 10pm and looked like a cross between a bingo evening and a rave with me being the youngest by at least 2 decades.
    Talked to a few of the jurrassic locals and they advised me to hit Mr Tong's for some "action".
    Went to Tong's as advised and took about 3 minutes before I was grabbed and making my way to some birds place in the middle of nowhere.
    Cannot really judge the place over one night but it ticked all the boxes for me.
    Black diamonds? I shit 'em.

  16. #16
    Not a Mod. Begbie's Avatar
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    Did you thank Marmite for his kind advice and directions?

  17. #17
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    Spent a month or two in UT all up and it's an interesting place.

    You see the extremes of the culture - the welcoming, happy, generous, friendly, genuinely nice... and the evil, gold digging, human right abusing, exploitation that both come from a city in poverty in the middle of nowhere.

    The police run everything through fear and intimidation, which is a natural response due to them being murdering, torturing scum who can murder and torture with impunity.

    Plenty of scum farang up there too. Plus it's too flat for me bike.

    The average udonite is nice though. And the girls are easy to sleep with.

  18. #18
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    ^^ I done all me own legwork begbie.
    Must admit I had a wingman with me and we done our research trawling through sites on the ever so helpful Blackberry on the bus back from the Laos border.
    To be honest I was half-tempted to give Marmite a PM to see if he fancied a beer but was too scared of the rejection and that he may be the same kinda bloke in real life as he is here! (just kidding).
    Actually if you do read this Marmite I promise to PM you next time I'm up there and treat you a game of pool and a 60bt tiger in the aircraft hanger.

  19. #19
    たのむよ。
    The Gentleman Scamp's Avatar
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    I'll give it more of a chance next time, if the trains are flooded. Marmite I lost your number.

  20. #20
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    Marmite the Dog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bogon
    Actually if you do read this Marmite I promise to PM you next time I'm up there and treat you a game of pool and a 60bt tiger in the aircraft hanger.
    Bollocks.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bogon
    that he may be the same kinda bloke in real life as he is here! (just kidding).
    no, he's twice the size

  22. #22
    Thailand Expat
    Bogon's Avatar
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    ^^Well with that attitude Marmite you can scrub the 60baht tiger and relegate yourself to just a game of free pool you miserable sod.

  23. #23
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    Fabian's Avatar
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    I would have liked to see it. Too bad that my missus refused to go there. Well, would be a bit of a difficult drive now anyway. Maybe could have taken a boat.

  24. #24
    たのむよ。
    The Gentleman Scamp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fabian
    my missus refused to go there.
    Like I said, it's shit.

  25. #25
    loob lor geezer
    Bangyai's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bogon View Post

    It was now 10pm and looked like a cross between a bingo evening and a rave with me being the youngest by at least 2 decades.

    .
    So you're in your early sixties then ?

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