| At the end of the day, 'sinsot' is the tradition in Thailand, just as dowry is in India. It is not invented for the farang, so whilst we may not like it because it does not exist in our culture, well so what- it Is. If you can't deal with the concept, don't marry a Thai.
Problems can arise because some locals get too greedy and try and rip off the farang- but problems can also arise when a farang, unused or insensitive to local ways, aggressively negotiates it as if it was a fake Gucci or something. This is considered demeaning to both parties- it is best really to bargain via an intermediary, more often than not the wife to be or a trusted 'auntie'. But the huge "Big Face" type sinsots do not come from farangs in Thailand- they come from Thai weddings betweeen affluent families.
Personally, apart from paying out about 15k baht for a village party, I paid no sinsot- I was never asked to actually. I asked why (later), and was told that as I was buying a house in Thailand for Mrs, plus had been paying 6k bht rent for the Mil when she lived in Bkk I had 'done enough'. also, we were considered already married- in fact we were already married, in Australia.
I suppose rapacious demands for Sinsot- especially if it is obvious that ones betrothed is 'in on' the outrageous demand- give you a pretty good clue as to the nature of the family you are marrying into. Rarely the formula for a happy marriage, so think again. I've heard the horror stories of never ending requests for money, but in reality I've not encountered it first hand in my time here- most families seem to be basically reasonable. Paying a sensible amount of sinsot should not be seen as a ripoff, or an insult.
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Last edited by sabang : 05-11-2009 at 07:02 AM.
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05-11-2009, 06:55 AM
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