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  1. #1
    Member beano's Avatar
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    Just Another Day In The US.

    Woman Attacks Her Wife With ‘Turkey Baster’ Full of Sperm


    In Pittsfield, MA Stephanie K. Lighten, 26, allegedly tried to artificially impregnate her wife Jennifer A. Lighten, 33, against her will. Jennifer Lighten told police that her wife was “all liquored up” when she allegedly tried to use a syringe to inseminate her, and that Stephanie had been talking about trying to impregnate her for some time. According to the police report “Jennifer said that Stephanie had a ‘turkey baster and her brother’s semen in a sealed container.’ Jennifer said she told Stephanie that she didn’t want to get pregnant.” (According to police the ‘turkey baster’ was actually a large syringe with a catheter tip.)

    That’s allegedly when Stephanie threw Jennifer on the couch, grabbed at her clothes and threatened to impregnate her.

    Jennifer broke free, ran into the bathroom and locked the door. When Stephanie broke the bathroom door down, she hurt her wrist in the process, and Jennifer escaped when Stephanie went to get an ice pack from the freezer. Jennifer attempted to get away in the couple’s SUV and as she tried to pull away, Stephanie jumped on the side of car and made Jennifer stop. A witness at the scene claimed Stephanie “was hanging on the SUV door handle, trying to get into the car.” Police arrived at the scene and arrested a very intoxicated Stephanie Lighten outside her home.
    Police then confiscated the weapon, plus a container of semen and some aluminum foil, which was originally was used to hold the semen. Nicholas Lighten, Stephanie Lighten’s brother, was the donor, according to officers.

    Woman Attacks Her Wife With ‘Turkey Baster’ Full of Sperm | Lez Get Real

  2. #2
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    patsycat's Avatar
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    If only these fora had sound systems. You would all have heard me cackling from all the way over here!!!

  3. #3
    ทำไมคุณแปลนี้
    filch's Avatar
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    ^
    I thought you'd left to go to the market?

  4. #4
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    patsycat's Avatar
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    On my way, on my way - have to let my hair dry first. Leaving in about 45 minutes.

  5. #5
    Thailand Expat
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    Quote Originally Posted by patsycat
    - have to let my hair dry first. Leaving in about 45 minutes.
    why are you still on line then?

  6. #6
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    patsycat's Avatar
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    I leave the computer on.

    Went to market and had a coffee on a terrace for the first time this year in the sunshine.

  7. #7
    The cold, wet one
    November Rain's Avatar
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    Back to the OP,

    If she was drunk, why didn't the other one just wait until she'd fallen asleep (or passed out, depending on how drunk she was) and *aherm* baste away? She'd never have known. Well, not until she started vomiting in the morning and wanting to eat pickles with custard, if the insemination was successful.

  8. #8
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    blackgang's Avatar
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    NR, Because that would have never worked, the drunk one was the "husband" and the one with the turkey baster, so maybe tho the "wife" could have knocked her up when she passed out but that was not the plan when this started.

  9. #9
    How Dare You!!
    Looper's Avatar
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    Her brother's semen? Was this in Louisiana?

    That's the problem with not using the right tool for the job. Should of attached a longer catheter tube to the end of the turkey baster and then gaffer taped it to a 10" strap-on.

  10. #10
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    blackgang's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Looper
    Her brother's semen? Was this in Louisiana?
    NO, it was Ma. but it was the "husbands" brother, so what does that mean?

  11. #11
    How Dare You!!
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    I just hope she rinsed her mouth out after spitting the semen into the turkey baster!


  12. #12
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    blackgang's Avatar
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    The Kennedy clan is from Ma.
    You know Teddy Kennedy,, He is a jack off so maybe that other dude is too.
    But I do believe Teddy would suck a dick tho..

  13. #13
    Member beano's Avatar
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    Dick sucking seems to be a conservative politician thing.
    Mind you, never let it be said that the liberals are without the occasional bad habit.

  14. #14
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    blackgang's Avatar
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    How about this then , seems like all kinds of shit are going on in the USA, but this bit of news sounds a bit ridiculous.

    Countess' divorce plea: $53K a week too little - Life- msnbc.com

    updated 6:20 p.m. ET March 18, 2009
    HARTFORD, Conn. - A 36-year-old Swedish countess divorcing a former CEO says she cannot live on $43 million.
    Marie Douglas-David, a former investment banker, says she has no income and needs her 67-year-old husband, George David, to pay her more than $53,000 a week — more than most U.S. households make in a year — to cover her expenses.

  15. #15
    Member beano's Avatar
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    Ah well, that's what you get for marrying above your station.
    He could have had the hottest Thai gogo dancer in Cowboy for a fraction of that, including family support and sick livestock.

  16. #16
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    Damn spendy pussy them swedes.

  17. #17
    The cold, wet one
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    Quote Originally Posted by blackgang
    NR, Because that would have never worked, the drunk one was the "husband" and the one with the turkey baster, so maybe tho the "wife" could have knocked her up when she passed out but that was not the plan when this started.
    Aaah, got it now. Thanks for clarifying, BG.

  18. #18
    Thailand Expat Texpat's Avatar
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    It's clear from her failure that Stephanie is not a master baster.

  19. #19
    The cold, wet one
    November Rain's Avatar
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    ^ Very good, Tex.

  20. #20
    Days Work Done! Norton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by November Rain
    Aaah, got it now. Thanks for clarifying, BG.
    Glad to hear someone has. I sure as hell don't get any of it. The world has become a confusing place.

    Stephanie is the husband married to Jennifer! So unless Stephanie was named by the father who named his son Sue in the Johnny Cash song, Stephanie is one tough woman throwing Jennifer on the couch, kicking down doors and attacking an SUV.

    Having premeditated the whole thing Stephanie convinces her brother to jerk off in some aluminum foil apparently so she could freeze it before she found the opportunity to fill the baster and catch Jennifer in a compliant mood.

    Having failed to convince Jennifer to allow herself to be impregnated, Stephanie has a few too many Budweisers and decides to rape her wife Jennifer with a baster. Jennifer resists runs away and the police get involved.

    The bit that has me confused is this took place in Massachusetts! Just can't be a true story. Things like this are just not done in Mass.

    It would be more believable if it took place in San Francisco wouldn't it Booners?
    Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Texpat
    It's clear from her failure that Stephanie is not a master baster.
    No she apparently is not, but is also clear that her brother is a master baiter.


    Quote Originally Posted by Norton
    The bit that has me confused is this took place in Massachusetts! Just can't be a true story. Things like this are just not done in Mass. It would be more believable if it took place in San Francisco wouldn't it Booners?
    Yes, that is more San Francisco style, but I also think that Mass. is the only state where queers can legally marry ain't it?

  22. #22
    Days Work Done! Norton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by blackgang
    I also think that Mass. is the only state where queers can legally marry ain't it?
    Think you are right. Been away too long. Remember the days when everything used to be "banned" in Boston?

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