Thought for the day

**Gerbil** · 09-08-2008, 06:55 AM

When you wish upon a falling star, Your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.

**nedwalk** · 09-08-2008, 09:32 AM

thank you for that compforting thought

i shall sleep well tonight

**Gerbil** · 09-08-2008, 09:25 PM

INCOMPETENCE.

When You Earnestly Believe You Can Compensate For A Lack Of Skill By Doubling Your Efforts, There's No End To What You Can't Do.

**danbo** · 09-08-2008, 09:59 PM

Those obsequious folk who fawn after you in fancy restaurants and hotels don't really like you, in fact they couldn't care less about you. If you were to drop down dead at their feet all they'd think would be, "Has he given me a tip yet?"

**melvbot** · 09-08-2008, 10:00 PM

Music.
Play it loud or dont bother.

Ive been listening to a lot of metal lately.

**sunsetter** · 09-08-2008, 10:15 PM

never problems, only solutions

**Jet Gorgon** · 09-08-2008, 10:40 PM

never problems, just challenges

**danbo** · 09-08-2008, 11:01 PM

Problems, bloody problems, nothing but problems.

**Gerbil** · 09-08-2008, 11:02 PM

"It Could Be that the Purpose of Your Life Is Only to Serve as a Warning to Others."

**danbo** · 09-08-2008, 11:09 PM

Death is not the end....An archaeological TV program of future might accidentally stumble across your crumbling bones and give you 10 minutes of fame on the Discovery channel.

**danbo** · 09-08-2008, 11:13 PM

Money means nothing, absolutely nothing....but the things that it can buy are really important.

**Jet Gorgon** · 09-08-2008, 11:19 PM

^ Ya, like integrity.

**danbo** · 09-08-2008, 11:48 PM

Radio 4 in the UK has a 'Thought for the Day' slot, usually filled by a religious type of some denomination or other. The following offering was from a Church or England vicar:

"I was driving home after parish duties and noticed a car approaching on the same side of the road as me. I was not too concerned, being sure that the other driver would soon move over. However, they did not change lanes and we continued towards each other. I was getting more and more angry with this person. How could they be so idiotic, so wrong. I lost my rationality and my temper; I cursed the other driver. We continued on a collision course, both of us flashing our lights and sounding our horns. Only seconds before an impact I realised with a shock that it was I that had been driving on the wrong side of the road all along and I swerved to correct myself. It was I who had been in error, but my certainty of my right had clouded my very judgement and actions".

This little tale stopped me in my tracks; it made me think deeply, and it had me questioning myself on a very important matter that concerns each and every one of us - The question was this: Should vicars be given driving licenses? Now I know we can't judge every vicar on the basis of this idiot, but better to err on the side of caution I say.

**Gerbil** · 10-08-2008, 12:17 AM

CONSULTING.

If You're Not A Part Of The Solution, There's Good Money To Be Made In Prolonging The Problem.

**baldrick** · 10-08-2008, 12:18 AM

alcohol is only a problem after the event.

**EmperorTud** · 10-08-2008, 02:45 AM

Thailand is the most dangerous tourism destination for Britons. Remember this when booking a holiday there.

**EmperorTud** · 10-08-2008, 02:46 AM

Originally Posted by baldrick

alcohol is only a problem after the event.

The trick is to just keep drinking.

**The Fresh Prince** · 10-08-2008, 02:50 AM

"Optimism"

How do blind people know when they've finished wiping thier arse?

**danbo** · 10-08-2008, 10:27 PM

No one cares about you, nobody. Your loved ones, those closest to you, they don't care, not really. Strangers, they're completely indifferent. The only one who cares is you, and let's face it you're not actually all that bothered.

**EmperorTud** · 10-08-2008, 10:46 PM

Originally Posted by The Fresh Prince

How do blind people know when they've finished wiping thier arse?

They sniff the paper of course!

**Carnwadrick** · 10-08-2008, 11:38 PM

Originally Posted by The Fresh Prince

How do blind people know when they've finished wiping thier arse?

Originally Posted by EmperorTud

They sniff the paper of course!

**The Fresh Prince** · 11-08-2008, 03:50 AM

Originally Posted by EmperorTud

Originally Posted by The Fresh Prince

How do blind people know when they've finished wiping thier arse?

They sniff the paper of course!

I'd never thought of that. Green for you!

**The Fresh Prince** · 11-08-2008, 03:51 AM

Sorry Tud i'm out of greens.

next time.

**Jock Itch** · 12-08-2008, 08:02 AM

Originally Posted by danbo

but my certainty of my right had clouded my very judgement and actions

............. isn't this what all religions rely on for support ??

sorry..... my athiesm clashing with cynicism

**The Fresh Prince** · 12-08-2008, 08:19 AM

Originally Posted by Jock Itch

Originally Posted by danbo

but my certainty of my right had clouded my very judgement and actions

............. isn't this what all religions rely on for support ??

sorry..... my athiesm clashing with cynicism

I've got no idea what you just said but I heard the word religion!

Keep polotics and religion out of the pub! You know the rules!!

Plus I've got a bloody hangover from hell! I think I might still be drunk

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