Percussionists should be ridiculed just like DJs
If you couldn't be arsed to learn the drums but were too skint to buy new music and records, hey presto! The next best thing would be to become a percussionist, grow your hair and grow a goatee, get some tattoos and then annoy people by adding the same tom-tom rhythms over every song you play alongside.
I have been DJ-ing playing at house music nights and have on three occasions been accompanied by a percussionist.
Bang bang slap slap bang bang bang - oh, I'll just run my drumstick through some glittery dangling things....... bang bang slap slap (sounds like a lot of people putting up shelves)
I just kept my headphones on throughout.