Thread: Help

Originally Posted by kelpie

"Tourist." Now that's a slur. My first visit to the Fair City was in 1972

ahhhh, a very old tourist.

Originally Posted by kelpie

All I require, without booring the shit out of you, is a Condo. No more, no less.

Original thought here, but bear with me.....

Did you ever think of trying a property website? Or even posting your rather 'interestingly' phrased request in the property section of this forum?


Sorry, rather simple of me, I know.

Originally Posted by kelpie

All I require, without booring the shit out of you, is a Condo. No more, no less.

In that case you may as well fuck off, because we haven't got one.

Bye.

^

Originally Posted by Marmite the Dog

Originally Posted by kelpie

All I require, without booring the shit out of you, is a Condo. No more, no less.

In that case you may as well fuck off, because we haven't got one.

Bye.

Now that;s a little nastier than required.....


hmmm. perhaps not, carry on.

Originally Posted by dirtydog

Maybe someone should start a thread on, "Things Aussies can be proud of", although I doubt even cmn could stretch that one out to 100 posts, how much can be said about Fosters and Rolf Harris's and didgerido thingy.

Famous last words.

kelpie, for a bloke that has been coming to Pattaya for so long allegedly you don't seem very well, erm, plugged in.

My advice- get thee to Maggie Mays pub in Soi Chayapoon.
The owner has a small apartment he's willing to rent cheap.
It's cheap because it's located next to a Karaoke, so either buy ear muffs or go to bed pissed.

If that doesn't work, wander around Chaiyapoon/ LK Metro area and negotiate a monthly rate. Theres loads of rooms- Bar Stereo might be a good place to start, on the corner of Soi Diana Inn and LK Metro. Or they have a web site if you care to google them.

^ Expect some shit for your helpful advice sabang... He is after a condo in Jonti..

He must be too old to know what Google is but he has got this forum lark sussed...

Jomti, h'mm wander up and down the lower soi's, keep your eyes open, ask around in bars. He'll find something.

Alternatively, try negotiating a monthly rate at the Nirvana Condo's, Soi 4. Very nice actually (I used to stay there), but I would guess it will be north of 30K per month. Google for the web site.

You have the Majestic on soi Wat Boon ( same soi as the Winchester), i'm only guessing but i would imagine the rooms there are in the 6-8000 baht a month range.

Originally Posted by buriramboy

You have the Majestic on soi Wat Boon ( same soi as the Winchester), i'm only guessing but i would imagine the rooms there are in the 6-8000 baht a month range.

Thank you Bur.

At least there is one helpfull old stager on this excuse for a Board.

Mate are the rest of the boofheads ex Football hooligans whom get together and hold a riot each week. Do any of the clowns actually live in LOS.

Whom is this foul mouthed dickwhit Marmite. Now I know he dosen't have a Condo. You can't have a Condo in Jonti if you reside in a Wormwood Scrubs bedsit on Social Security. But hell he must be a great puller (or scruffing the Moderator) as he had my little gem of a reply post pulled down real quick.

This little list is not censored is it. Perish the thought. Imagine a list devoted to the delights of the Fair City being censored by Expat fat pommies.

Sabang mate.

Unfortunately most of my mates in Pattaya have passed on (big C, grog) or pissed of to Cambo although I think Dudley at the Penthouse is still there as is the bloke at Queen Vic. and possibly the blokes at the Winchester. Shit I hope those pricks from the Freeway have gone.

rawlins mate.

Young Noel (used to do the Tipplers in the Pattaya Mail) Stickman and many other ratbag others pretty much invented the first lists. They used to be wannabe user friendly then.

Marmite the Dog mate.

Be advised that you should not play with matches mate. Hell didn't the dear old bitch that whelped you tell you that.
Trust me you have neither the wit nor the intellect to go ten rounds with the old dog. You heels will be in tatters.

The kelpie.
Caring and sharing as always.

Vic is still at the QV- he's my neighbour.
The old owner of the Winchester has moved to Angeles, runs a place called Winchester there.
Freeway is no more- called something else now.

Originally Posted by kelpie

Unfortunately most of my mates in Pattaya have passed on

I presume you will be following them before too long. No worries, there's enough Pattaya scum to take your place, so I doubt you'll be missed too much.

Originally Posted by kelpie

Trust me you have neither the wit nor the intellect to go ten rounds with the old dog.

You're an Aussie - You have neither wit nor intellect.

Originally Posted by kelpie

Unfortunately most of my mates in Pattaya have passed on (big C, grog) or pissed of to Cambo although I think Dudley at the Penthouse is still there as is the bloke at Queen Vic. and possibly the blokes at the Winchester. Shit I hope those pricks from the Freeway have gone.

must be your turn soon, no?

I like the cut of this guys jib.... kelpie mate - you can come and doss down in my penthouse gaff until you find a suitable cesspit in jonti...

One condition though - you have to keep clean shaven and be polite to my current wench 'Speccy Brace Face' or your arse is out the door...

How's that for a helping suggestion?...

Originally Posted by rawlins

I like the cut of this guys jib.... kelpie mate - you can come and doss down in my penthouse gaff until you find a suitable cesspit in jonti...

One condition though - you have to keep clean shaven and be polite to my current wench 'Speccy Brace Face' or your arse is out the door...

How's that for a helping suggestion?...

rawlins mate.

You are indeed a good sammo mate. The little shitter just knew there would have to be one decent bloke with a sense of humour and a love of stray's on this shitty list.

I shall pack me hessian bag and save me bikki's and be in touch.
Mate don't you worry about the lovely wrench 'SBC' as the old dog is renowned for his love and regard for little brown toothies. Hell me dear old brindle Mum was one and don't worry I will grow on you. Bit like a cattle tick really.

Regards.
The kelpie.

Originally Posted by Marmite the Dog

Originally Posted by kelpie

Unfortunately most of my mates in Pattaya have passed on

I presume you will be following them before too long. No worries, there's enough Pattaya scum to take your place, so I doubt you'll be missed too much.

Originally Posted by kelpie

Trust me you have neither the wit nor the intellect to go ten rounds with the old dog.

You're an Aussie - You have neither wit nor intellect.

Marmite mate.

Thats it ?????????

Shit mate two lines. Bugger me that must have stretched your powers of the venach. What a bloody tosser.

Pattaya scum !!!!!!

Bugger me mate unless your to slow to notice you apparently reside in the biggest brothel on the planet. Chirping Cross I mean as you twitter like a budgie. You should get out more.

Mate. You won't go three.

Regards.

The kelpie

Regrettably, marmite does not reside in Pattaya.

Originally Posted by sabang

Regrettably, marmite does not reside in Pattaya.

Mum doesn't let me out into the real world. We did go to Bournemouth once for the weekend though. IT was very nice, but full of old people who smelt funny.

Originally Posted by Marmite the Dog

Originally Posted by sabang

Regrettably, marmite does not reside in Pattaya.

very nice, but full of old people who smelt funny.

Sounds a bit like downtown Pattaya actually.

Originally Posted by sabang

Originally Posted by Marmite the Dog

Originally Posted by sabang

Regrettably, marmite does not reside in Pattaya.

very nice, but full of old people who smelt funny.

Sounds a bit like downtown Pattaya actually.

I wonder if mummy will let me go there one day to look at all the fat people who can't get laid? How much is the bus from Wilmington Station?

Originally Posted by Marmite the Dog

I wonder if mummy will let me go there one day to look at all the fat people who can't get laid? How much is the bus from Wilmington Station?

i think she let you if i go with you...

Originally Posted by kelpie

rawlins mate.

You are indeed a good sammo mate. The little shitter just knew there would have to be one decent bloke with a sense of humour and a love of stray's on this shitty list.

I shall pack me hessian bag and save me bikki's and be in touch.
Mate don't you worry about the lovely wrench 'SBC' as the old dog is renowned for his love and regard for little brown toothies. Hell me dear old brindle Mum was one and don't worry I will grow on you. Bit like a cattle tick really.

Regards.
The kelpie.

Looking forward to it Kelpie... I'll even put a couple of large Leos in the fridge so you can enjoy your first day out on the balcony.. Haven't got a stone table to make you feel more at home, only a glass topped one I'm afraid... Be careful with it as all damages have to be paid for...

I hope you ain't an early riser, as me and 'SBF' like to lie in until the sun goes down... Feel free to join us for our evening breakfast ritual, before SBF heads off for her shift at the Go-Go, leaving me free for a few liquid libations in the run-down bar of your choice...

Perhaps you could introduce me to a few of the original bad eggs that built the city into what it is today... I'm always on the lookout for new mates...

All the best,
rawlins

Originally Posted by thetyim

I thought they was a rule that all posts should be in English (or thai where needed)

No kidding!! And he is criticising someone elses English yet...

Originally Posted by kelpie

Either that or you are very bored. If indeed you are a Moderator I should like to lodge a formal complaint thru your good self in that I have been sledged by some ignorant Red Neck whom resides in a trailer park on Social Security whom is somewhat hampered by a lack of understanding of the English language

All I can say is WOW!!!!! Tralier parks in Thailand? I'd think that is a great concept could shelter a ton of people instead of these tin shacks but I've never seen one...Anyone else??

Based on this thread I can't see anyone being more "redneck" than this dope....

#1 Wants to live in kennel
#2 Wants to shag the "little brown toothies"
#3 Used to sleep under a pool table
#4 Is obviously a racist
#5 Refers to himself in the third person as the "little shitter" and the "old dog"

Wow....Too much material here to list it all, I'd be here all day and never even get this thing posted...

Originally Posted by sabang

Regrettably, marmite does not reside in Pattaya.

Saba Mate.

Really mate. Bloody hell just as well really as every little brown toothie in the joint would be knocked up or totally shagged.
This dynamic dog must be a better fucker than he a corro or is he just sort of semi-comatosed every day. Marmy lay of the source and the yah bah.

Please.
The kelpie.

Got a real dog fight on our hands here!..Someone break out the water hoses!!