Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 44
  1. #1
    たのむよ。
    The Gentleman Scamp's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Last Online
    03-01-2017 @ 04:09 PM
    Location
    もうがまんできない!
    Posts
    9,754

    Could you go back to wiping your arse with tissue paper?

    I once heard that the British and the Chinese were the filthiest nations in the world for toilet clenliness in that the former wipe away as much faeces as they can using tissue paper, smearing it against the nipsy and removing most but not all of the waste, whereas the Chinese simply drop their trousers, push it out and pull their trousers back up again.

    Having spent six years spraying my backside clean as a whistle and half the time giving myself an enema in the process, and living with a woman who does it using soap or Lactacyd then the idea of going back to wiping my bum seems rather revolting.

    If you vomit do you wash your face and gargle with Listerine after or do you simply wipe your mouth on your sleeve and be done with it until your next bath/shower?

    Dirty bastards we once were.
    "I'm an outsider by choice, but not truly. It's the unpleasantness of the system that keeps me out. I'd rather be in, in a good system. That's where my discontent comes from: being forced to choose to stay outside.
    My advice: Just keep movin' straight ahead. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place."

    George Carlin

  2. #2
    Thailand Expat
    Marmite the Dog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Last Online
    08-09-2014 @ 10:43 AM
    Location
    Simian Islands
    Posts
    34,827
    I had a few weeks without a bum-gun in my new place. Bladdy horrible it was.

  3. #3
    Thailand Expat
    sabang's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Last Online
    04-09-2019 @ 05:06 AM
    Location
    BackinOz
    Posts
    30,807
    Definitely would not want to be without a bum gin.

  4. #4
    Whopping Member
    benbaaa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Last Online
    06-06-2017 @ 03:52 PM
    Location
    In the comfy chair
    Posts
    5,549
    My parents actually bought one out here and had it fitted back in the UK. Cost of bumgun 120B. Cost of UK plumber 85 quid.

    It's great except for in the winter. Then it's one hell of a shock first thing in the morning.

    And the answer to the OP is of course not - there's no way I'd go back to being a dirty Brit the way I used to be.
    The sleep of reason brings forth monsters.

  5. #5
    Mea-Culpa
    Dalton's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Last Online
    31-10-2018 @ 03:57 AM
    Location
    In the sticks.
    Posts
    7,389
    ^ You guys have to much time on your hands...

  6. #6
    bkkmadness
    Guest
    NEVER going back to tissue paper, bum gun all the way!

  7. #7
    Member
    Sparky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Last Online
    09-07-2010 @ 08:14 AM
    Posts
    627
    I've wiped my arse the same way sice I was old enough to do it myself see no reason to change now . Just use more paper .

  8. #8
    Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Last Online
    06-09-2017 @ 09:23 PM
    Posts
    121
    bum guns get youir ase clean, but smell your fingers after ... at least with tissue it only goes around your arse, and not your hands too.

    British people fold their toilet paper - which means that the bog roll has to dissolve quickly. Americans scrunch their paper, so it does not have to dissolve so fast - meaning there are different required specs for the dissolution of bog roll in siad countries. Thai's never figured this, and use tissue to wipe surfaces etc... it is not just low quality paper, it is designed to break up rapidly, unlike napkin/paper towels.

    I know you know this one ....

    What do bog roll and the starship Enterprise have in common ?

  9. #9
    Rhubarb, rhubarb, rhubarb
    Sir Burr's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Last Online
    16-06-2009 @ 09:54 AM
    Location
    Phuket.
    Posts
    4,668
    Both get rid of Klingons?

  10. #10
    Thailand Expat
    qwerty's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Last Online
    12-11-2019 @ 03:25 PM
    Location
    Not far from Ratchada.
    Posts
    1,032
    Bum guns are Thailand's one great gift to civilization. I'd never go back to plain TP!

  11. #11
    The Pikey Hunter
    Gerbil's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Last Online
    @
    Location
    Roasting a Hedgehog
    Posts
    12,356
    From listening to these conversations, it always amazes me that there are apparently so many westerners who were never taught how to wipe their arses properly when they were kids.

  12. #12
    Newbie
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Last Online
    13-03-2008 @ 12:26 PM
    Posts
    11
    After approx. 20 years of using water, no way would I go back to TP.

  13. #13
    Member

    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Last Online
    20-10-2017 @ 05:14 AM
    Location
    The End
    Posts
    958
    I hate bum guns.

  14. #14
    lom
    lom is offline
    Thailand Expat lom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Last Online
    @
    Location
    Trapped in an old mans body
    Posts
    8,479
    Quote Originally Posted by Silent Orchestra
    I hate bum guns.
    You'll get used to it.
    And then you'll never want to use paper again.

  15. #15
    Member
    kayo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Last Online
    14-06-2016 @ 06:06 PM
    Location
    England (ex-LOS)
    Posts
    465
    I left Thailand in 2004.

    And moved to Guatemala.

    Where the poor use buckets of water (like many Thai places) and the wealthier use loo roll.

    The sewage system of Guatemala is iffy at best.

    Why they don't use water/bum guns is beyond me.
    It's cleaner, and less damaging to the sewage system/environment.

    And now I've been back in the UK for ten months, I think exactly the same thing.

    I want a Bum Gun.

    Instead, I try to time my daily excretion to happen just before I immediately hop into my daily shower. a sort of extra large, nice warm Bum Gun.

  16. #16
    The Pikey Hunter
    Gerbil's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Last Online
    @
    Location
    Roasting a Hedgehog
    Posts
    12,356
    Quote Originally Posted by kayo
    Instead, I try to time my daily excretion to happen just before I immediately hop into my daily shower. a sort of extra large, nice warm Bum Gun.
    Sounds lovely Glad I dont have to use that shower after you.

  17. #17
    Member

    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Last Online
    20-10-2017 @ 05:14 AM
    Location
    The End
    Posts
    958
    Quote Originally Posted by lom View Post
    You'll get used to it
    I never could.

    I used it while it was there, but wouldn't want to use another.

  18. #18
    Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Last Online
    06-09-2017 @ 09:23 PM
    Posts
    121
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir Burr View Post
    Both get rid of Klingons?



    well, they circle round Ur-anus and wipe out Klingons.

  19. #19
    Thailand Expat Texpat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Last Online
    @
    Location
    In your head
    Posts
    13,014
    We were poor when I was young and used old corn cobs. The Truscott's down the lane were even poorer than us -- they had a corncob on a string nailed to the outhouse door.

    I don't think Thais have the market cornered on bum guns -- Japs have 'em too.

    Me go back? nevah.

  20. #20
    I am in Jail

    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Last Online
    22-11-2011 @ 08:27 AM
    Location
    Christian Country
    Posts
    15,020
    ^ We used old Sears catalogues at Granma's. You flicked through a few pages and ripped one out to use.
    I was thinking of getting a bum gun here, but as noted above re the UK installation, Canadian winter water is icy cold. Wouldn't work on the hot water tap either, coz then you'd fry your butt. But, I do love them.

  21. #21
    Band
    oldgit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Last Online
    06-11-2015 @ 07:31 PM
    Location
    Worthing/Doi Saket
    Posts
    1,170
    How do you use the bum gun? do you use then pull up trousers with a wet behind, or is that what the toilet roll is for? I have two in our house but they have never been used by me.

  22. #22
    Member

    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Last Online
    20-10-2017 @ 05:14 AM
    Location
    The End
    Posts
    958
    That's what I never got the hang of.

    How do you dry your arse afterwards? Seems to me, you have to use the bog roll to dry it, so you may as well just have used it in the first place.

  23. #23
    Thailand Expat Texpat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Last Online
    @
    Location
    In your head
    Posts
    13,014
    As a rinse after brushing your teeth.

    Not that hard to figure out really, spray it off, pat it dry.

  24. #24
    Member

    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Last Online
    20-10-2017 @ 05:14 AM
    Location
    The End
    Posts
    958
    Quote Originally Posted by Texpat View Post
    pat it dry
    I get it now....

    All you lot have got hemroids

  25. #25
    Thailand Expat
    hooter's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Last Online
    28-03-2019 @ 10:29 PM
    Location
    Jomtien
    Posts
    1,766
    Hemorroids are rather painful. A bum gun clean and a quick push back up is your best bet. No TP involved .

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •