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  1. #1
    Utopian Expat
    Chittychangchang's Avatar
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    England on fire as dragons take their revenge

    TOWNS and villages across England are ablaze after giant dragons chose St George’s Day to avenge their murdered comrade.

    The fire-breathing lizards with wings emerged from their caves at sunrise and swept down on unsuspecting communities, setting light to roofs, cars and thousands and thousands of people.

    Jane Thompson, who was running for her life in Peterborough, said: “Jesus fucking Christ, what the hell is happening? Where is the army? WHERE THE FUCK IS THE ARMY?”

    She added: “The funny thing is we needed the roof redone anyway. So at least now we can claim it on the insurance.”

    Thompson was then incinerated by a searing jet of sulphurous flame that seemed to come from the very pits of hell.

    Martin Bishop, a 417 year-old dragon from Salisbury, said: “The fact is that dragon was on its way home after a hard day’s work helping humans and St George, who had been accused of sexual harassment, needed a distraction.

    “So he then accuses this innocent dragon of eating a baby and then executes it in broad daylight as everyone stands around and cheers him on like he’s some kind of bloody hero.”

    Bishop added: “And yet you continue to idolise this monster. How would you like it if we celebrated Saint Hitler’s Day every year? Because that’s basically what you’re doing. It’s incredibly offensive.

    “Anyway, I guess this year it all got too much, what with the economy and everything.

    “Have you been watching Game of Thrones? It’s quite good, isn’t it?”

    Raise a glass to St.George Teakdorian's.

    Cheers

    CCC

  2. #2
    Member Merrimack's Avatar
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    Escape in that dream. Enjoy your chingchang. That same show is happening right now live here in LOS.

  3. #3
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    Ratchaburi's Avatar
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    Where is that tin foyle hat gone

  4. #4
    Thailand Expat VocalNeal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Merrimack View Post
    Escape in that dream. Enjoy your chingchang. That same show is happening right now live here in LOS.
    I guess America doesn't have dragons then? Oh wait! Not olde enough

  5. #5
    Member Merrimack's Avatar
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    We have Bigfoot and the Florida Swamp man, not to mention routine alien landings.

  6. #6
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    Mr Lick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chittychangchang
    a 417 year-old dragon from Salisbury
    That sounds very much like my ex
    Last edited by Mr Lick; 24-04-2014 at 10:19 PM.

  7. #7
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    Game of thrones, good innit?

  8. #8
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    dirk diggler's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Merrimack View Post
    We have Bigfoot and the Florida Swamp man, not to mention routine alien landings.
    I'll see your mythical beasts, and raise you a Loch Ness Monster!

  9. #9
    Member Merrimack's Avatar
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    A Jackelope, a Chupacabra, and old Three-fingered Willy beat that. Got anything else?

  10. #10
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    dirk diggler's Avatar
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    Unicorns and haggii.

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