Tourist Goes Troppo, Torches Bikes

**Seekingasylum** · 16-12-2013, 03:45 AM

Folk truly underestimate the effects of a hot, tropical climate, the disorientating influence of an endless cycle in which each day is invariably the same as the next, the relentless incomprehension that flows from existing among a race of people scarcely qualified to be considered as such given their obsession with stupidity and ignorance and, above all, the omnipresent illusion that because somewhere is described as a paradise it should actually be one. Fling a tedious diet of rice and chilli hot, dog food and alcohol into the mix served up by beautiful women unhampered by a brain but shot through with every conniving and devious stratagem known to every Jezebel since Eve, and it's no surprise a Caucasian chap should go a tad doolally.

Frankly, herberts like this chap are two-a-penny in Khorat and Surin and are quite unremarkable. Hua Hin tends not to get too many but then it is a convalescent home for those too dull to have an imagination worth vey much beyond calculating one's dividends and the price of fish.

**jamiejambos** · 16-12-2013, 03:57 AM

^
That's about the size off it........Kudos to the naked bloke. reminds me of me and my mates when we were younger.

**taxexile** · 16-12-2013, 08:39 AM

thegent

Hua Hin tends not to get too many but then it is a convalescent home for those too dull to have an imagination worth vey much beyond calculating one's dividends and the price of fish.

sour grapes old bean, sour grapes, and as you endure the hardships of blighty in the winter whilst topping up your funds to enable you to complete the purchase of your nest in pattayagrad, (the construction of which seems to be taking a while though, lets hope the company big cheeses havent run off to macau or singapore with the loot!!) you can try as hard as you like to convince yourself that the russkies are decent folk that bring prestige, conviviality and wholesomeness to the crime ridden streets, knee deep sleaze and glitzy superficiality of pattaya, but europeans have learnt through experience, history and gut instinct to steer well clear of boris and the loud disruption that is his travelling companion

why you decided to make life difficult for yourself and purchase on that side of the gulf remains a mystery, but as you yourself said, the disorientating effects of the climate can and do often result in the white man making poor decisions. mad dogs and englishmen i think the song goes.

hua hin is, thankfully, relatively free of the russian menace and is all the better for it, the environs of hua hin have become home to well behaved and clean living northern europeans in the main, an atmosphere of community, friendliness, and helpfulness prevails as opposed to the atmosphere of confrontation, mistrust and backwatching that engulfs pattaya and for those in the know, the price of fish is a good deal cheaper in hua hin than elsewhere.

the city centre may play temporary host to out of town gawpers and shirtless familymart beerswillers, but confronted with the civility of the place, they thankfully soon move on to pattaya or patong where they can feel more at home.

i shall be in pattaya early next year, the first time in a decade, and although i go with an open mind i dont expect much from it, although the dusit hotel is supposed to be decent enough, and expect we will quickly move on to our next destination, chantaburi.

in the meantime, i wish you and yours a merry xmas.

**Seekingasylum** · 20-12-2013, 07:53 AM

Thank you, and all the best to you and yours.

Th Dusit is getting on a bit but spot on for location.

Try the Hilton terrace for your evening meal and let the zephyrs wafting in from the bay soothe those loins of yours.

Gullivers next to the Amari is excellent for Thai food and a decent watering hole that the shirtless, shaven headed, tattooed oiks don't seem to frequent. Soi 7/8 is still worth observing but probably best after you've had a few and replete with the milk of human kindness. Have a few in Rosie's and watch the passing parade - fascinating in a Hogarthian way.

There is a music bar in Nakhlua Soi 18, Leo Blues Bar, worth checking out and better than that ghastly place off Walking Street. Smaller, more intimate and without the crowds.

If you fancy a bit of tropical alfresco eating then take a trip to Cabbages & Condoms in Pratumnak Soi 4 for the ambience but go after 2100 hrs to miss the herd.

Enjoy but take it easy - you chaps fresh out of the convalescent home have to pace yourselves.

Dosvedanya!

**pickel** · 30-12-2013, 12:44 AM

I heard a rumor tonight that this guy died in custody in Trat. That's all I heard, and it is just a rumor, so it could be utter bullshit as well.

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