Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 44
  1. #1
    Thailand Expat
    Simon43's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:26 PM
    Location
    Luang Prabang
    Posts
    2,869

    I am the target of TWO conspiracy plans

    I have unearthed shocking news about 2 separate and devious plans here in sleepy Luang Prabang, where I am the target!

    Both of them have the same goal ==> to find me a Lao wife!!

    Plan 1 - I rent the upstairs of an upmarket teakwood house that overlooks the river. The millionaire owner lives downstairs. He and a teacher at my school intend to throw a fcuking big party with hot women,



    invite me to attend as a matter of politeness, and then hope that nature takes it's course and I drag 1 (or more) women upstairs.

    Plan 2 - A more gentle plan that the school admin staff have apparently organised to find a nice Lao lady who matches my tastes,


    (where they are going to find a 20-year old nympho in tight denim shorts who bangs like a Chinese firecracker, I don't know..)

    Apparently, all are concerned that I might get lonely in LP and bugger off back to Thailand. My management style at the school (do whatever u want cos I don't give a flying) is appreciated by all staff.

    (In case other school staff - especially Americans - read that last comment, it is a classic example of my British sense of humour ==> it is a JOKE!).

    Now one could get lonely in LP I suppose, but money can always find a solution.

    I need to see how I can play this to my advantage. Plan A seems to offer the best opportunity for some wild action, but Plan B might prove fruitful.

    What's my next move??

    Simon
    Groping women when you're old is fine - everyone thinks you're senile

  2. #2
    Thailand Expat
    Albert Shagnastier's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Last Online
    22-03-2015 @ 09:09 PM
    Location
    City of Angels
    Posts
    7,164
    take both of them

  3. #3
    The Pikey Hunter
    Gerbil's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Last Online
    @
    Location
    Roasting a Hedgehog
    Posts
    12,356
    Plan A - Less chance of having to build another hotel.

  4. #4
    Member
    Bettyboo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:25 PM
    Location
    Bangkok
    Posts
    30,773
    They've heard about you, and they want their cut of that hotel. End of...

    Is this the right thread for this picture?


  5. #5
    Thailand Expat
    Simon43's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:26 PM
    Location
    Luang Prabang
    Posts
    2,869
    I bet that's some sort of ladyboy....

  6. #6
    Member
    Bettyboo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:25 PM
    Location
    Bangkok
    Posts
    30,773
    Not as far as I'm aware. She looks all woman to me. The question begs: would you be prepared to build her a hotel?

  7. #7
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
    withnallstoke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Last Online
    29-10-2019 @ 02:29 AM
    Location
    The Felcher Memorial Home.
    Posts
    14,275
    Buy some denim shorts and a mirror.

    Wear the shorts and bend over with your back to the mirror.

    Knock one out whilst looking at your own arse.

    Saves on the building hassles.

  8. #8
    Thailand Expat
    Simon43's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:26 PM
    Location
    Luang Prabang
    Posts
    2,869
    All woman??!! Look at the length of her fingers! No way was she born a girl....

    Withnallstoke - I could wear a tutu and fishnets, but my appearance would not come close to my ideal fantasy woman

  9. #9
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
    withnallstoke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Last Online
    29-10-2019 @ 02:29 AM
    Location
    The Felcher Memorial Home.
    Posts
    14,275
    Quote Originally Posted by Simon43
    I could wear a tutu and fishnets
    Get the piccies up.

    I think Looper has high heels you could borrow - he says they are size 11.

  10. #10
    Thailand Expat
    Kurgen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Last Online
    30-10-2019 @ 12:35 PM
    Location
    Shitsville
    Posts
    8,811
    Quote Originally Posted by Simon43
    All woman??!! Look at the length of her fingers! No way was she born a girl....
    That fukker would struggle to get a knuckle duster to fit 'her'.

  11. #11
    Member
    Bettyboo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:25 PM
    Location
    Bangkok
    Posts
    30,773
    Woman! She's a woman or I'm a raving poofter...

  12. #12
    Thailand Expat
    Simon43's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:26 PM
    Location
    Luang Prabang
    Posts
    2,869
    Look mate, that's a LB! Look at her face - that's a devious smile as if to say 'You don't know what I know...'

    Anyway, here's that picture of me that Withnallstoke asked for.


  13. #13
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
    withnallstoke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Last Online
    29-10-2019 @ 02:29 AM
    Location
    The Felcher Memorial Home.
    Posts
    14,275
    Quote Originally Posted by Bettyboo
    I'm a raving poofter...
    Horses mouth.

  14. #14
    Thailand Expat
    Simon43's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:26 PM
    Location
    Luang Prabang
    Posts
    2,869
    Furthermore m'lud, I just Googled for:

    'Thai ladyboy with big dick'

    and got this photo



    I rest my case - you're buggered (figuratively, of course)

  15. #15
    Member
    Bettyboo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:25 PM
    Location
    Bangkok
    Posts
    30,773
    That's a woman too...

  16. #16
    Banned

    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Last Online
    03-06-2014 @ 09:01 PM
    Posts
    27,545
    Lao girls are devious.
    Beware...

  17. #17
    Member
    Bettyboo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:25 PM
    Location
    Bangkok
    Posts
    30,773
    I thought all Laos girls were LBs? You couldn't get involved with a Laos woman, so the LBs were out in force; true or a myth?

  18. #18
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
    withnallstoke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Last Online
    29-10-2019 @ 02:29 AM
    Location
    The Felcher Memorial Home.
    Posts
    14,275
    Quote Originally Posted by Rural Surin
    Lao girls are devious.
    But they love it up the bum.

  19. #19
    Banned

    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Last Online
    03-06-2014 @ 09:01 PM
    Posts
    27,545
    Quote Originally Posted by withnallstoke View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Rural Surin
    Lao girls are devious.
    But they love it up the bum.
    Have a closer look at my av...



    [hope she's not reading this]
    Last edited by Rural Surin; 01-08-2013 at 10:38 PM.

  20. #20
    Thailand Expat
    Simon43's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Last Online
    Today @ 03:26 PM
    Location
    Luang Prabang
    Posts
    2,869
    Lao girls are devious.
    Beware...
    They are complete pussies compared to my Thai ex's

  21. #21
    Gohills flip-flops wearer
    withnallstoke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Last Online
    29-10-2019 @ 02:29 AM
    Location
    The Felcher Memorial Home.
    Posts
    14,275
    Quote Originally Posted by Rural Surin
    Have a closer look at my av...
    Have you got a photo from the back?

  22. #22
    En route
    Cujo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Last Online
    Today @ 08:42 AM
    Location
    Reality.
    Posts
    28,633
    Quote Originally Posted by Simon43 View Post
    I have unearthed shocking news about 2 separate and devious plans here in sleepy Luang Prabang, where I am the target!

    Both of them have the same goal ==> to find me a Lao wife!!

    Plan 1 - I rent the upstairs of an upmarket teakwood house that overlooks the river. The millionaire owner lives downstairs. He and a teacher at my school intend to throw a fcuking big party with hot women,



    invite me to attend as a matter of politeness, and then hope that nature takes it's course and I drag 1 (or more) women upstairs.

    Plan 2 - A more gentle plan that the school admin staff have apparently organised to find a nice Lao lady who matches my tastes,


    (where they are going to find a 20-year old nympho in tight denim shorts who bangs like a Chinese firecracker, I don't know..)

    Apparently, all are concerned that I might get lonely in LP and bugger off back to Thailand. My management style at the school (do whatever u want cos I don't give a flying) is appreciated by all staff.

    (In case other school staff - especially Americans - read that last comment, it is a classic example of my British sense of humour ==> it is a JOKE!).

    Now one could get lonely in LP I suppose, but money can always find a solution.

    I need to see how I can play this to my advantage. Plan A seems to offer the best opportunity for some wild action, but Plan B might prove fruitful.

    What's my next move??

    Simon
    Whatever happens don't offer to build anyone a fuckin hotel. OK?

  23. #23
    Pronce. PH said so AGAIN!
    slackula's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Last Online
    @
    Location
    Behind a slipping mask of sanity in Phuket.
    Posts
    9,093
    Quote Originally Posted by Simon43
    invite me to attend as a matter of politeness, and then hope that nature takes it's course and I drag 1 (or more) women upstairs.
    ...And then buy them hotels

    Quote Originally Posted by Simon43
    Plan 2 - A more gentle plan that the school admin staff have apparently organised to find a nice Lao lady who matches my tastes,
    Does Laos have the demented loons or money grabbing slags that are your penchant?

    Presumably it does so let's face it: it's really only a matter of time until we see a "Building a hotel for a demented slag transgender lunatic in Luang Prabang, I can't possibly see how this might have been a less than optimal business plan given my vast experience of getting screwed again and again. I am an internet marketing guru who relies on PayPal, Oh, and my CB radio doesn't work" thread.

  24. #24
    Thailand Expat
    wasabi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Last Online
    28-10-2019 @ 03:54 AM
    Location
    England
    Posts
    10,958
    Can you please remind readers of "how many DAYS has it been since your last divorce."

  25. #25
    Thailand Expat
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Last Online
    @
    Posts
    60,017
    Quote Originally Posted by Simon43
    All woman??!! Look at the length of her fingers! No way was she born a girl....
    Indeed, imagine where she could put one of them while....


    you get the idea.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •