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Fluke · 20-02-2013, 02:04 PM

In what some African American comunity leaders call a disgusting spectacle beyond words, a local black man Henry Simms tracked down the decendants of slave owners who owned his ancesters in an attempt to return himself as 'lost property' in order to collect room and board.

"Times are hard.Henry said as he set up a tent on the vacant lot across from the home of Fred and Lara Duncan.I lost my job last year at the factory,and had to live out of my car."
Things looked bleak until Henry saw an episode of ROOTS on BET last summer and decided to track down his family tree.

"I learned that my great,great,Grand father was a slave owned by the Duncans,he told our reporter pointing at the home across the street.I figured 'what the heck' I'll just return myself to them."

The Duncans would not return our calls,but put out a statement which read "We do wish for any troluble,and the actions of Mr.Simms are very disturbing."

Police were called an Mr.simms recived a restraing order keeping him 50 feet from their home.
Henry decided to pitch a makeshift camp on the edge of that boundery in a vacant lot.

"They will take ownership of me! If I have to wait all winter out in the cold I will." Henry replied in a determined voice.

We will report any new developments in this ongoing story.

blue · 20-02-2013, 02:24 PM

Great idea ! as a skint Britain I think i'll track down decendants of Emperor Nero in Rome and return myself to them .

Davis Knowlton · 20-02-2013, 02:33 PM

That's actually quite funny.

bsnub · 20-02-2013, 02:46 PM

What a load of shit. Wheres the link?

Fluke · 20-02-2013, 02:47 PM

Havent got one

AntRobertson · 20-02-2013, 02:51 PM

Where did it come from, email?

pickel · 20-02-2013, 03:01 PM

Sounds like something The Onion would do.

Norton · 20-02-2013, 03:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blue

Great idea ! as a skint Britain I think i'll track down descendants of Emperor Nero in Rome and return myself to them .

Frying pan into the fire.

ltnt · 20-02-2013, 03:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fluke

Henry decided to pitch a makeshift camp on the edge of that boundery in a vacant lot.

Location is wrong, its in Issan and Gravesend Dave is his neighbor.

Norton · 20-02-2013, 03:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bsnub

Wheres the link?

Here's one.

African American Man Tries To Return Ownership of Self To White Family. - Topix

kmart · 21-02-2013, 09:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AntRobertson

Where did it come from, email?

A couple of doobies watching "Django Unchained" probably.

Rocksteady · 21-02-2013, 10:35 PM

Can't see why the family have a problem? Free labour, shackle him to a wall in between, rent him out to service the local obese women, charge the 'beasts' a decent wedge to work on him and feed him pigs swill. Job done!

barbaro · 21-02-2013, 10:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fluke

In what some African American comunity leaders call a disgusting spectacle beyond words, a local black man Henry Simms tracked down the decendants of slave owners who owned his ancesters in an attempt to return himself as 'lost property' in order to collect room and board.

"Times are hard.Henry said as he set up a tent on the vacant lot across from the home of Fred and Lara Duncan.I lost my job last year at the factory,and had to live out of my car."
Things looked bleak until Henry saw an episode of ROOTS on BET last summer and decided to track down his family tree.

"I learned that my great,great,Grand father was a slave owned by the Duncans,he told our reporter pointing at the home across the street.I figured 'what the heck' I'll just return myself to them."

The Duncans would not return our calls,but put out a statement which read "We do wish for any troluble,and the actions of Mr.Simms are very disturbing."

Police were called an Mr.simms recived a restraing order keeping him 50 feet from their home.
Henry decided to pitch a makeshift camp on the edge of that boundery in a vacant lot.

"They will take ownership of me! If I have to wait all winter out in the cold I will." Henry replied in a determined voice.

We will report any new developments in this ongoing story.

Erm....Fluke....

Any link to this story?

I think the "40 acres and a mule" (which was never followed up on) 150+years ago might slightly....negate his claim.

And if the alleged dead relative of....150+ years ago is actually a former dead owner, does legal law allow compensation in the form of rent 150+ years later?

Me thinks this OP might.....a reproduction of some email joke.

Fluke · 22-02-2013, 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rocksteady

Can't see why the family have a problem? Free labour, shackle him to a wall in between, rent him out to service the local obese women, charge the 'beasts' a decent wedge to work on him and feed him pigs swill. Job done!

It could become a new trend .

II

II

nidhogg · 22-02-2013, 12:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fluke

In what some African American comunity leaders call a disgusting spectacle beyond words, a local black man Henry Simms tracked down the decendants of slave owners who owned his ancesters in an attempt to return himself as 'lost property' in order to collect room and board.

If real, he needs to brush up on his history, and particularly the Emancipation Proclamation of 1st January, 1863.

Fluke · 18-04-2013, 02:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nidhogg

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fluke

In what some African American comunity leaders call a disgusting spectacle beyond words, a local black man Henry Simms tracked down the decendants of slave owners who owned his ancesters in an attempt to return himself as 'lost property' in order to collect room and board.

If real, he needs to brush up on his history, and particularly the Emancipation Proclamation of 1st January, 1863.

What did that say ?

nidhogg · 18-04-2013, 02:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fluke

Quote:

Originally Posted by nidhogg

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fluke

In what some African American comunity leaders call a disgusting spectacle beyond words, a local black man Henry Simms tracked down the decendants of slave owners who owned his ancesters in an attempt to return himself as 'lost property' in order to collect room and board.

If real, he needs to brush up on his history, and particularly the Emancipation Proclamation of 1st January, 1863.

What did that say ?

That slaves were freed, and hence no longer property.

alwarner · 18-04-2013, 02:59 PM

I love it when joke threads turn out like this.

sabang · 18-04-2013, 09:26 PM

I come from a family of bog Irish serfs on my mothers side, and one of my progenitors was illegitimately duffed up by a Gallaher (tobacco fortune). May I return my ownership too?

waradmiral · 18-04-2013, 10:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Davis Knowlton

That's actually quite funny.

fuck yeah it is it's hilarious

be great on a comedy program

20-02-2013, 02:04 PM	#1 (permalink)
Fluke Member Last Online: Today 03:54 PM Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Chiang Mai Posts: 566	African American Man Tries To Return Ownership of Self To White Family. In what some African American comunity leaders call a disgusting spectacle beyond words, a local black man Henry Simms tracked down the decendants of slave owners who owned his ancesters in an attempt to return himself as 'lost property' in order to collect room and board. "Times are hard.Henry said as he set up a tent on the vacant lot across from the home of Fred and Lara Duncan.I lost my job last year at the factory,and had to live out of my car." Things looked bleak until Henry saw an episode of ROOTS on BET last summer and decided to track down his family tree. "I learned that my great,great,Grand father was a slave owned by the Duncans,he told our reporter pointing at the home across the street.I figured 'what the heck' I'll just return myself to them." The Duncans would not return our calls,but put out a statement which read "We do wish for any troluble,and the actions of Mr.Simms are very disturbing." Police were called an Mr.simms recived a restraing order keeping him 50 feet from their home. Henry decided to pitch a makeshift camp on the edge of that boundery in a vacant lot. "They will take ownership of me! If I have to wait all winter out in the cold I will." Henry replied in a determined voice. We will report any new developments in this ongoing story.

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20-02-2013, 02:24 PM	#2 (permalink)
blue Molecular Mixup Last Online: Today 03:58 PM Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: 54°N Posts: 6,448	Great idea ! as a skint Britain I think i'll track down decendants of Emperor Nero in Rome and return myself to them .

20-02-2013, 02:33 PM	#3 (permalink)
Davis Knowlton Philippine Expat Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Philippines Posts: 7,403	That's actually quite funny.

20-02-2013, 02:46 PM	#4 (permalink)
bsnub Thailand Expat Last Online: Today 03:59 PM Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Seattle Posts: 3,519	What a load of shit. Wheres the link?

20-02-2013, 02:47 PM	#5 (permalink)
Fluke Member Last Online: Today 03:54 PM Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Chiang Mai Posts: 566	Havent got one

20-02-2013, 02:51 PM	#6 (permalink)
AntRobertson I am in Jail Last Online: 23-05-2013 04:45 PM Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 17,574	Where did it come from, email?

20-02-2013, 03:01 PM	#7 (permalink)
pickel Elite Mumbler Last Online: Today 01:11 PM Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Elephant Island Posts: 4,205	Sounds like something The Onion would do.

21-02-2013, 10:35 PM	#12 (permalink)
Rocksteady Member Last Online: 30-04-2013 07:48 PM Join Date: Oct 2011 Posts: 812	Can't see why the family have a problem? Free labour, shackle him to a wall in between, rent him out to service the local obese women, charge the 'beasts' a decent wedge to work on him and feed him pigs swill. Job done!

18-04-2013, 02:59 PM	#18 (permalink)
alwarner Top Valver. Last Online: Today 03:58 PM Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Location: Location. Posts: 4,345	I love it when joke threads turn out like this.

18-04-2013, 09:26 PM	#19 (permalink)
sabang Thailand Expat Last Online: Today 03:47 PM Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: There Posts: 23,478	I come from a family of bog Irish serfs on my mothers side, and one of my progenitors was illegitimately duffed up by a Gallaher (tobacco fortune). May I return my ownership too?

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