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  1. #1
    Thailand Expat HermantheGerman's Avatar
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    Do you want good sex ?

    Hello Mates

    - so you came home late last night (got blasted?) and she’s pissed off again. It’s going to take a few days until you can get back into her bed.
    - or…. has your Viagra stopped working, and your girl is just tired of waiting for a train that never seems to arrive?
    - have you bought her sexy underwear, and all those cute little toys that go with it? But all you got out of her was a little giggle.
    - does she love Mr. Bean more then your Beans?
    - are you tired of paying Mama San for a girl that treats you like your mother-in-law?
    - are you tired of playing with your Oscar Meyer WIENER?

    O.K.
    This is what you will have to do.
    As we all know, our Dear little Thai Wife’s/Girlfriends love to eat something sweet. Well……. actually they always seem to be eating something.
    This will also work with your old’ Farangh Wife….if her teeth are still at place.
    What you got to do is to bake a cake for her. Yes, you heard me right YOU got to bake it.
    It’s really easy, and you will be thanking me (for your great sex life) for the rest of your life. Instead of thanking me, you can also make a small donation to D.D. or you can build me a little house. Hey….don‘t forget all the money that you will be saving.
    This cake has a touch of Farangh-Thai taste that I have created ® myself.

    You throw 150gr of butter,
    170gr sugar,
    a small pack of vanilla sugar
    3 eggs,
    a nit noi touch of salt, in a mixer, and mix it smooth.
    You slowly add some flour 250 gr,
    a teaspoon (7gr) of baking powder.
    At the end you add 100gr of dark chocolate chips, and
    100gr of dried coconut flakes and mix it slowly (so that the chocolate chips don’t break).
    You put the dough in a round baking pan and spread it evenly.
    On the top of the dough you put small pieces (diced) of mango (juicy).
    Put it in the oven at about 180 C. for 50min.- 60 min.

    This will get her where you want to go!
    Last edited by HermantheGerman; 30-03-2006 at 02:59 PM.

  2. #2
    A bladdy woman
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    I don't like cake.

  3. #3
    punk douche bag
    ChiangMai noon's Avatar
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    ^
    I don't like sex.

  4. #4
    A bladdy woman
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    Not always.

  5. #5
    Have you got any cheese Thetyim's Avatar
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    Sorry mate, but it makes my eyes hurt trying to read that so I gave up.

    Try a different colour

  6. #6
    Thailand Expat
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    too big now

    sex and cakes is good

    sex with cakes is better

  7. #7
    Thailand Expat HermantheGerman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Goddess of Whatever
    I don't like cake.
    my advice for you is:
    instead of sugar..... add CHILLY
    insteas of juicy mangos....add Isaan sausages (sliced of course)

  8. #8
    Thailand Expat HermantheGerman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DrAndy
    too big now

    sex and cakes is good

    sex with cakes is better
    you guys are hard to please....

    I don't know if that trick with the cake/sex will work

  9. #9
    Thailand Expat HermantheGerman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ChiangMai noon
    ^
    I don't like sex.
    but maybe your wife/girlfriend does !

    P.S. Computer consultants usually don't like sex

  10. #10
    Northern Hermit
    friscofrankie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HermantheGerman
    Quote Originally Posted by ChiangMai noon
    ^
    I don't like sex.
    but maybe your wife/girlfriend does !

    P.S. Computer consultants usually don't like sex
    your wife a computer consultant?

  11. #11
    Thailand Expat HermantheGerman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thetyim
    Sorry mate, but it makes my eyes hurt trying to read that so I gave up.

    Try a different colour
    eeehhhm.... is this big enough ?

  12. #12
    Thailand Expat HermantheGerman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by friscofrankie
    Quote Originally Posted by HermantheGerman
    Quote Originally Posted by ChiangMai noon
    ^
    I don't like sex.
    but maybe your wife/girlfriend does !

    P.S. Computer consultants usually don't like sex
    your wife a computer consultant?
    somthing like that (computer science).
    But I'am lucky....cause she must of fell into the cake dough when she was a child.

    P.S. do you have an Antidote for this terrible sex recipe?

  13. #13
    I am in Jail

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    i prefer quanity over quality

  14. #14
    Thailand Expat
    Marmite the Dog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HermantheGerman
    so you came home late last night (got blasted?) and she’s pissed off again. It’s going to take a few days until you can get back into her bed.
    I guess I'm lucky that it's my bed and if she's in a shitty mood she can fek off until sweetness returns.

  15. #15
    A bladdy woman
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    Quote Originally Posted by HermantheGerman
    Quote Originally Posted by Goddess of Whatever
    I don't like cake.
    my advice for you is:
    instead of sugar..... add CHILLY
    insteas of juicy mangos....add Isaan sausages (sliced of course)
    I don't like Isaan sausages, can I take anothing else instead?

  16. #16
    Thailand Expat HermantheGerman's Avatar
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    picky little one ?
    since your the Goddess here I will make an exception.

  17. #17
    Head Skivvie Stacker Storekeeper's Avatar
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    There was no mention of cigarettes anywhere.

  18. #18
    Thailand Expat Texpat's Avatar
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    How is baking a sausage cake going to lead to good sex?

    Wouldn't it just be easier to rub one out? I'm a lousy cook, but I can crack one out at the drop of a dime.

  19. #19
    A bladdy woman
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    My friend just sent me this..

    This guy is sitting in front of the TV watching the game when his wife comes in. "Honey can you take a look at the hallway light. It's flickering". The man looks up "Do you see me wearing a hat that says Electrician ? I don't think so" and he goes back to watching TV. "Well the mircowave isn't working can you look at it please ?" Again the man looks up and says "Do you see me wearing a hat that says Westinghouse ? I don't think so". The wife, now getting a little frustrated says "Well could you at least fix the front step. ? It is loose". The man is angry now "Do you see me wearing a hat that says Handyman ? I don't think so". The husband, tired of being nagged, says he is going to the pub and leaves.
    Several hours later he returns to see the front step is fixed. Walking inside he noticed the hallway light is fixed and he can hear the microwave going. "What happened ?" he asks. "Well" says his wife "just after you left this nice young man dropped by and he fixed the steps, the light and even the microwave". The husband is worried "How much did that cost" he demands. His wife smiles "Well the guy said I could either pay him by baking a cake or having sex with him". The husband shrugs "So what sort of cake did you cook ?" he asks. The wife looks him in the eye and says "Do you see me wearing a hat that says Chef ? I don't think so"................



  20. #20
    Thailand Expat HermantheGerman's Avatar
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    I would have taken both !
    The cake & sex.
    But don't ask me what I would have eaten first.

  21. #21
    A bladdy woman
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    I think I can guess it.

  22. #22
    Thailand Expat HermantheGerman's Avatar
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    I think you are wrong !!!!!!
    Because I don't like cake just LIKE YOU !

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