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  1. #1
    Lord of Swine
    Necron99's Avatar
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    Mc99's Burrito Special 179 baht with large Chang.

    Mc99's is proud to announce our New Food of the World Special, Burrito99's!

    For just 179 baht you get 4 mini burritos with Mc99's proprietary Ring of Fire Chilli filling, lettuce, carrot, cheese and genuine faux sour cream, all served with a large Chang!





    How can we do it? Step inside the Mc99's Food Science Laboratory for a quick tour and find out just what is is that makes this puppy* tick.


    Lets start with the green stuff, jumping straight into the meat would be like a wank without foreplay.

    Capsicum or Bell Peppers, a bunch. Chilli Con Carne' is literally, Chilli and Meat.
    1 Onion
    Half a carrot
    A big handful of Chilli
    Some Dried Chilli
    Tabasco
    White and Black Pepper
    Garlic, 4 cloves
    Cumin bout 2 tblsp
    Corriander Seed 1tblsp, Root, Stem and Leaves from 2 bunches.^
    Bay Leaves x2
    Tomato paste 2 tblsp
    Kidney beans, 1 can, drained.
    Mic of beef and pork stock, a bean can full.
    Dead Cow**
    Dead Pig, Several sorts
    Dead Chicken.

    * There is no actual puppy in Mc99's Chilli Burrito99's. We are assured by our local supplier that only 100% Dead cow is used in the production of its mince.

    ^ The seed, root, stem and leaves of coriander all give different flavours. Scrape the skin off the root before finely chopping. Throw away the little bit where the stems join the root and chop the stems abut half way up. Leaves and the last of the stem go in later.





    Chop your capsicums up roughly and fry lightly for 10 min or so, near the end add your finely chopped garlic and chilli and keep frying until the garlic is fragrant.

    Do the same with your onion and shredded carrot. Why put shredded carrot in chilli? apart from the added flavour, the carrot dissolves and thickens the sauce meaning you will never have to add flour.



    Add this to a pot containing everything but the meat, add half a bottle of beer or more to bring up the fluid level. Bring to a boil before turning to low. Fuck off and have a beer or something for 30 or 40 minutes while it simmers with the top on.



    Before we get on to the good stuff, give your sauce a taste and adjust heat and flavour.


    Dead shit!
    Kilo of pork neck.
    Kilo of Beef mince**
    Chicken breast with skin off.
    Couple of bacon rashers.




    Chop up and brown off your meat in batches with plenty of black pepper and add to the pot. No salt though, the beans are in brine and stock has plenty.

    ** Local beef mince may in fact contain races of puppy.

    Hmmmmm...bacon....



    Chicken, don't worry about the size, it's gonna break up.



    Too lazy to take a photo of the beef and port, you get the idea.
    Don't try to cook the meat, just brown on a high heat, it will cook in the pot.

    All into the pot, fill the rest with beer and bring to the boil for 5 min or so..



    Turn to low with the lid on and vent partly open and go do something for 2 hours. Give it a stir every 30 min or so and the odd taste.



    After 2 or 3 hours on low it will start to break up.



    Increase the heat to med/low and reduce to your desired consistancy while stirring and tasting. Use Tabasco rather than chilli to increase the heat for the habanero taste..




    Get it Now! Only at your local Mc'99s!


  2. #2
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    Bettyboo's Avatar
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    1) Do you deliver to NakhonNayok?

    2) What happened in the cricket? You were posting a lot, more rapidly as the Aussies approached victory, then everything went quiet...


  3. #3
    Lord of Swine
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    As can be seen, I was enjoying my repast in the middle of Maxwells' masterclass in batting, then we turned into England.

    Such is T20. Paki's bowled well. we bowled poorly.



    P.S Schadenfreude through Pakistan? You have sunk to a new low. Seek help. Maybe Trott could lend you his therapist...
    Last edited by Necron99; 24-03-2014 at 06:06 PM.

  4. #4
    Thailand Expat
    aging one's Avatar
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    Steaks, burgers, pizza, pies, all lovely. Mexican hmmm.........

    Quote Originally Posted by Necron99
    Use Tabasco rather than chilli to increase the heat for the habanero taste..
    More points deducted.

  5. #5
    Lord of Swine
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    Quote Originally Posted by aging one View Post
    Steaks, burgers, pizza, pies, all lovely. Mexican hmmm.........

    Quote Originally Posted by Necron99
    Use Tabasco rather than chilli to increase the heat for the habanero taste..
    More points deducted.

    Lack of habanaros or jalapenos in the local market.
    No matter, I'll take the Pepsi Challenge with Mexicali slop.....

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by aging one
    Mexican hmmm.........
    Does chili count as Mexican or something American?

    Beans in the chili? While acceptable to some, wildly inappropriate to most.

    Looks great, though I wouldn't have added the chicken with the dead, red meat.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by aging one View Post
    Steaks, burgers, pizza, pies, all lovely. Mexican hmmm.........

    Quote Originally Posted by Necron99
    Use Tabasco rather than chilli to increase the heat for the habanero taste..
    More points deducted.
    Indeed.
    Who puts carrots in a burrito?
    Otherwise - well done!

  8. #8
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    Chilli using pinto beans.


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