Beating your children

[dirtydog]

I have just whacked the fok out of my son, well, not that bad as he aint down and bleeding, second time in 15 years, do kids need a good beating every now and again?

[Camel Toe]

Yes, they do. But chances are good he'll become a beater himself. One must have a heart to heart after a beating to re-assure him it was wrong to do it, IMO.

[gjbkk]

was there any reason DD did he do wrong?

[DJ Pat]

Never did me any harm, my Thai mum had a stick specifically for the purpose, my dad just used his hands.

[melvbot]

Cant say as I beat my kids. Plenty of wrestling style headlocks and slams, the eldest is only 6 though and loves it. My dad only hit me once, crashed my 18th birthday present into a bus stop, telegraph pole and junction box, might have deserved that one.

[DrAndy]

Quote of the week...

Never did me any harm, my Thai mum had a stick specifically for the purpose, my dad just used his hands.

so, do not beat your kids, unless you want them to turn out like Pat

[jizzybloke]

I got some good beatings, nearly always deserved them and as Pat says doesn't seem to have done me any harm.

[keda]

I got some good beatings, nearly always deserved them and as Pat says doesn't seem to have done me any harm.

Looks like abused kids end up preferring big boobs, eh?

[Norton]

I have just whacked the fok out of my son, well, not that bad as he aint down and bleeding, second time in 15 years, do kids need a good beating every now and again?

What did he do? How old is he?

[Mid]

parental corporal punishment is both valid and lifesaving

[Norton]

I got some good beatings, nearly always deserved them and as Pat says doesn't seem to have done me any harm.

Left some nasty looking lumps on yer chest.

[chitown]

With today's laws in the US, my dad would problem due some serious time for the beatings he gave me! Helped to make me the man I am today!

Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

1957 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2008 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.

[keda]

Nothing wrong with a smack, and I don't think kids are 'brutalised' by it or turn into monsters; more likely to develop into spoiled brats if they're not nudged into line occasionally.

But much like a dog, if the kid doesn't understand what set you off it's wasted, so once the blood is hosed off the good dad should make a show.

[jizzybloke]

I have slapped the hooligan a few times but he just looks at me and laughs with a look of "is that the bet you've got" and i have to walk away so he can't see me laughing too!

[Gerbil]

Nothing wrong with it.

But do resist the urge to give them a kicking when you've knocked them down. It's not a bar fight.

[Wayne Kerr]

My old man used to whack us with bamboo. When I was about 10 he made me help him plant some bamboo and told me it was to hit me when I fucked up. Didn't do much damage to me, we laugh about it these days. I never hit Wayne Jnr as his mother and aunt are much better than me at the corporal punishment stuff.

[dirtydog]

I did go over the top, he is as big as me and i whacked the fok out of him which was totally unfair on him, fok I feel real guilty now a few weeks ago he was skiving from college and hitting the internet cafes for a couple of days, then today he said he couldn't rewire a plug, it annoyed me too much, he is doing electronics at college.

[dirtydog]

I feel like a real piece of shite, you don't punch kids.....

[DrivingForce]

I feel like a real piece of shite, you don't punch kids.....

closed fist might be a bit OTT.....

surprised to see so many fellow child abusers here.....

We had a row of Australian pines along side our house it was an endless supply of switches and the worst thing was my mom always made us pick our own . she used to strip off most of the larger branches to reduce the wind resistance for maximum effectiveness but left the little "cat-o-nine-tails" on the end to create some pretty good little welts on the back of your legs, if it broke and she wasn't done you didn't pick a good enough one and you got a few extra smacks with the second one...

I know we deserved it most of the time....

I do spank my boys, try to make it for good reasons, and I've gone OTT in my eyes a couple of times and the feeling does suck, (no blood or bruises or anything like that) the real trick is trying not to make it about anger and more about discipline, though that is very tough to do at that moment. so I always try to take a step back and deep breath if that's possible before the spanking, sometimes just that makes me think of another way to address it, especially if it's not as serious as originally viewed..

BTW DJ maybe that has some accounting for your anal fetish...

[robuzo]

I feel like a real piece of shite, you don't punch kids.....

You're right, you shouldn't have done that. It sounds like you didn't inflict much in the way of physical injury, but in the end unless the physical hurt is grievous it's the humiliation that does the damage. Once tempers have cooled taking him for a man-to-man, heart-to-heart might help you get his respect back. Dishing out a beatdown won't gain his respect for you, and it will contribute to his losing self-respect.

Parents who beat their kids do it for different reasons; the stepfather who resents his adopted son's existence is not the same as a frustrated father who genuinely loves his kid, fears the path he sees the kid is on, and lashes out having reached the end of his rope. A kid will probably know when his parent is a twisted sadist as opposed to a frustrated dad. At the risk of getting all mushy, as long as he knows you love him it should still be possible to make things right.

Being a parent is just fucking impossible, I'm finding out myself that the best you can do is try not to fuck them up too much.

Philip Larkin - This Be The Verse

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself

[MUSTY]

D.D.
Not a perfect world, no perfect parents or perfect kids.
You have already learned your lesson, your kid probably hates you, the
sought of deep male hate that goes deep down and one day it may errupt
violently and generally in full force in your direction. I know I had
to let my expectations of my kids go, because they were mine, not there's.
Still only two ways, these days it's the hard way for the 'y' generation.

Take this on board because you can see it now, take your kid and go see an independant person. Drop your whole load in front of your boy, apologise, shake hands (because he understands this). Hand the reins over to him, because he knows best anyway (they all do). Tell him your there if he needs you, because you can fed the unemployed. No handouts at all.

Join the local gym or buy the gear and vent any of your frustrations.
I don't know jack shit about you or your kid. Let the school of hard knocks drive him, be a back seat driver. Hug him heaps, he thinks your crazy anyway.

[jizzybloke]

can the family room be seen by guests or is it like members?

[AntRobertson]

Cross that bridge when I come to it, not an issue yet. Would like to think not but bit hard to say conclusively right now.

But what I don't get is how adults who were brought up with corporal punishment at home and at school suddenly decided that it was detrimental to them. Did they just wake up one morning and decide it had screwed them up or something?

[ChiangMai noon]

I feel like a real piece of shite, you don't punch kids.....

especially for failure to re wire a plug, hope he can change a lightbulb or he could be well and truly fukkled.

[dirtydog]

I deal with stoopid Thais everyday, I don't expect my son to be one.