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  1. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by kingwilly
    I doubt very much your missus cooked it up in a traditional roast without at least adding some chillies, fish sauce or somtam or boiling some random green bits of grass or something.
    Maybe a sly teaspoon of MSG.




    Quote Originally Posted by zimba
    If an animal is called for get a Dog and be done with it.
    Won't be getting (or adopting) any more animals for a bit. LOve dogs but they're as much responsibility as a child and they shit all over the place.



    Quote Originally Posted by zimba
    "slam bang meow"
    Sounds like a Chinese basketball play.

  2. #27
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    [. No, I would instead be attacking the fucking cat who was standing in it! Using the roast potatoes and the Yorkshire pudding as a vantage point, the heinous moggie was gnawing vehemently at the cut of premium roast beef, its front legs knee-deep in gravy.



  3. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap View Post

    But it quickly became apparent that I wouldn’t be attacking my roast dinner today. No, I would instead be attacking the fucking cat who was standing in it! Using the roast potatoes and the Yorkshire pudding as a vantage point, the heinous moggie was gnawing vehemently at the cut of premium roast beef, its front legs knee-deep in gravy.
    Do front legs have knees?

  4. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sumocakewalk View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap View Post

    But it quickly became apparent that I wouldn’t be attacking my roast dinner today. No, I would instead be attacking the fucking cat who was standing in it! Using the roast potatoes and the Yorkshire pudding as a vantage point, the heinous moggie was gnawing vehemently at the cut of premium roast beef, its front legs knee-deep in gravy.
    Do front legs have knees?
    No they would be Elbows

  5. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sumocakewalk
    Do front legs have knees?
    Required reading...

    Do Cats Have Elbows? - Pets

  6. #31
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    It seems the question of knees versus elbows in regards to feline front leg anatomy is in a quandary. There are opinions on both that are being promoted as correct. I am of the elbow camp. Regarding the OP, I can sympathize with the fact that the fury creature was making a mess of the Sunday dinner, regardless of whether it was elbows or knees planted in the gravy.

    Just the other day, our feline friend made an assault on an unfortunate gecko that ventured into our house while we were out. I came back to find all my disc drives knocked over, with one of them having suffered a fall to the floor. After a quick test I found that it was still in working order, but I was still none too pleased with the situation. I usually oppose retribution against felines, but this did raise my ire to a certain degree. It resulted in a stern warning to the kitty cat, along with some tossing of water at the offender. Not that it will do any good because after all, she is a cat.

  7. #32
    Member Roger Ramjet's Avatar
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    King Willie has hit a very sore point right on the head!! ........with his extremely accurate assumption "I'm sure you have all those components, I doubt very much your missus cooked it up in a traditional roast without at least adding some chillies, fish sauce or somtam or boiling some random green bits of grass or something"............

    Me personally, I would rather put up with a furry pussy than the risk of one of those inverted, wriggling, eat anything and shit it into the gravy little ghekos!
    I mean its like a blowfly in the marmite. (or vegemite if your from the colonies)
    What is really needed here is a workable and devious plan to prevent the contamination of a proper roast dinner, with the completely taste destroying herbs and crap that even the very finest Isaan wives seem absolutely and completely unable to resist the temptation to add to the family roast!
    I would try cooking it myself and send her to her mother's ..........but she died.....and when on occasion I have managed to get a roast to completion so it tasted like a traditional roast .....I got great compliments on how good it tasted!

    For those in Isaan who are really hanging out for a tender lamb roast....I found a supermarket under the Centra shopping centre in Udon that has really first class lamb.
    "Looking for a cold beer to put out the chilli!"

  8. #33
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    You probably could have salvaged your roast dinner, it's not like the cat was like a dog and run off with the whole roast. Probably just had a nibble at the corner which can be cut off.

    My cat used to nick fish fingers.

  9. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by patsycat View Post
    You probably could have salvaged your roast dinner, it's not like the cat was like a dog and run off with the whole roast. Probably just had a nibble at the corner which can be cut off.

    My cat used to nick fish fingers.
    Now that's proper scummy behavior!

    You can't eat food after an animals already tucked into it,well I can't anyway

    Each to their own though!

  10. #35
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    Why not? If you see it has nibbled at a corner, you just cut off that corner. Or just slice yourself another bit. It's not like the whole roast has been gobbled at like a dog would do.

    OK, I drew the line at salvaging a fish finger off the floor... Of which the breaded bit had been delicately peeled off to get at the fish underneath.

  11. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by patsycat
    Why not? If you see it has nibbled at a corner, you just cut off that corner. Or just slice yourself another bit.
    I'd slice off a bit of the cat if he came near my dinner. Cat's are horrible creatures and they will eat your eyeballs when you die Patsy

  12. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by Roger Ramjet View Post
    King Willie has a very sore head!! .....your missus cooked it up or something"........I would rather put up a furry pussy than the risk of one of those little ghekos!
    I mean its like a blow. (if your from the colonies)
    What is really needed here is the very finest Isaan wives and the family!
    I would try cooking myself like a traditional first class lamb.
    My english is very bad. I deleted the words I don't understand. Could someone explain what Roger is writhing

    Thank you very much
    Dane

  13. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dillinger
    Cat's are horrible creatures and they will eat your eyeballs when you die Patsy
    And if you become paralysed before you die the fvckers will eat them while you're alive. Watch your back (or your eyes)

  14. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Albert Shagnastier
    And if you become paralysed before you die the fvckers will eat them while you're alive. Watch your back (or your eyes)
    Just imagine if cats were the size of lions or cheetahs or leopards or tigers. They'd fucking eat you soon as look at you. Do not be fooled by the fluffiness.

  15. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap
    ust imagine if cats were the size of lions or cheetahs or leopards or tigers
    i sat and pondered there for a while....

    I'm gonna Rick Thai some fukker for that

  16. #41
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    You are all just scared of cats, how silly is that. A lot of men are, nothing to be embarassed about.

  17. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by Roger Ramjet
    I would rather put up with a furry pussy
    Tough job, but someone has to do it...

  18. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dillinger
    they will eat your eyeballs when you die Patsy
    Reminds me of the old Thai woman who died and they found her covered in the little jee-jo fckers that were devouring her rotting corpse...

    Story was, she ate the little bstards when she was alive...And they came and returned the favour when she died...

    I was asking Thai friends why they didn't eat the little boogers like everything else, and I was told it was a Buddhist thing...Then, they remembered the story of the old woman...

  19. #44
    Thailand Expat poorfalang's Avatar
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    Dear slapper,
    i will suggest that you stop right now, get yourself four cans of beer, unopened, you, then will enjoy the contents of it, leaving you half happy, you will also get a string, any colour will do, once you have enjoyed your drink you will take the string and tie the cans all together like a train one after the other. then get your goPro ready, then tie one end of that string to that long thing hanging above the cats anus, i think it is called a TALE, well secured and still holding the cat grab a seat, throw the cat gently to the floor with it's cans hanging from it's tale and let the cat go nuts, the cat will run until the cans fall off if they don't fall off the cat will run until it passes out because of exhaustion.
    Oh, one more thing, once you recorded all of the action with your GoPro upload it so i can enjoy it too,


    PS. I hate cats,
    Sorry about me horrible speling

  20. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by "Albert Shagnastier"
    And if you become paralysed before you die the fvckers will eat them while you're alive. Watch your back (or your eyes)
    Just imagine if cats were the size of lions or cheetahs or leopards or tigers. They'd fucking eat you soon as look at you. Do not be fooled by the fluffiness.
    Felines have it over most species, including humankind. Shouldn't sit us on a pedestal as it's not deserved.

  21. #46
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    ^^ Just off out to by a Go Pro.

  22. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by poorfalang View Post
    Dear slapper,
    i will suggest that you stop right now, get yourself four cans of beer, unopened, you, then will enjoy the contents of it, leaving you half happy, you will also get a string, any colour will do, once you have enjoyed your drink you will take the string and tie the cans all together like a train one after the other. then get your goPro ready, then tie one end of that string to that long thing hanging above the cats anus, i think it is called a TALE, well secured and still holding the cat grab a seat, throw the cat gently to the floor with it's cans hanging from it's tale and let the cat go nuts, the cat will run until the cans fall off if they don't fall off the cat will run until it passes out because of exhaustion.
    Oh, one more thing, once you recorded all of the action with your GoPro upload it so i can enjoy it too,


    PS. I hate cats,

    Endless hours of fun to be had by just putting a sock over it's head, have a few cones and spend ages watching it walking around backwards bumping into shit.

  23. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by poorfalang
    throw the cat gently to the floor with it's cans hanging from it's tale
    Fireworks are better, one of them homemade Isaan ones would be fun

  24. #49
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    And you all fell for it.

    Of course any feline would get a quick flick of the foot under the tail if it tried to nick my lunch. But mine were trained to wait. Apart from Madame Fish Finger nicker. In the end i just cooked two extra for her.

    I did make a mistake once, i went to a Boxing Day party and left the turkey on the table which had been savaged by me and my mates the day before.

    The whole lot of them finished it off. But that was my fault.

    Got yaz.

    A friend of mine's dad died a few years ago. He lay there dead for a week and his dog licked his face off.

    We can love our furry friends, but not to the point that their lives take over ours.

    So, Davey, rest assured. When you come to take piccies of Geneva and i invite you to eat you will not be eating cat leftovers. As i no longer have any cats.
    Last edited by patsycat; 13-06-2014 at 03:56 AM.

  25. #50
    Member Roger Ramjet's Avatar
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    I can't believe these DANE's ......
    "I would try cooking myself like a traditional first class lamb.".......Maybe he is expecting to get sunburnt! Surely he is not planning to cook himself?

    To explain.......I was noting that most guys in the West married to Thai women, who like the taste of a traditionally cooked meat roast, have a tough time getting it cooked without it tasting "like Thai Somtam" rather than the traditional taste, due to their wives/girlfriends feeling they must always change the taste to "Thai" ........by adding various dead creature Thai spices and sauces!

    I don't really fancy "roast viking" even with Thai fish sauce!

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