Wayne, Jock, and Doc Fish Thailand

**Wayne Kerr** · 10-09-2007, 08:25 PM

By some rare stroke of good luck I managed to swing a few days leave last week just as a few old mates were flying into Thailand on the good old “business trip to Thailand” thing. Our plan was to check out a fishing charter somewhere down the east coast and spend a few days drinking beer and chasing tuna. I anticipated that things would get a bit messy along the way, but forgot about how much fun can be packed into a 3 or 4 day trip to Thailand. WARNING: pictures and video contained herein may cause depression should you be living outside Thailand .

**Wayne Kerr** · 10-09-2007, 08:38 PM

As the day the chaps arrived was my first day off for months I just felt like taking it easy at home, eating some good food, and maybe slipping in a massage in the afternoon. By midday I felt like I’d been on leave for a week

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^ The local fresh food market in the Huay Kwang area of Bangkok

^ A spot of Mrs. Kerr’s chilli and pepper crab – click here (Wayne Kerr’s Chilli Crab) for instructions on how to knock this up yourself

^ We bunged the shrimp on Mrs. Kerr’s little bbq she knocked off from the local somtam lady a few years back

^ We went in for the big freshwater suckers – a few “hoi waan” thrown in amongst them too

^ Lovely looking critters

^ All washed down with some lovely local beer and a bottle of OP Bundaberg Rum

**Wayne Kerr** · 10-09-2007, 09:00 PM

Anyway one of the chaps was a “Thai Virgin” so after lunch we had an important task before us. I told him that I’d organised for him to stay in one of the big “hotels” along Ratchadaphisek Rd for the evening and wanted him to have a look beforehand to make sure he was happy with it and stuff. I think he realised that he was in some sort of big bloody knocking shop when he saw the big round bed like they have in the porno flicks. Either way I think he worked out what he was in for when the “room service” arrived

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^ Lovely hotel room along Ratchadaphisek Rd in Bangkok

^ The rooms have got a pretty nice spa in them too

^ I will say no more

**Wayne Kerr** · 10-09-2007, 09:51 PM

Anyway after the massage Mrs. Kerr suggested that I do the right thing and show the lads around the lower Sukhumvit Rd area ... bless her soul. I thought a heavy drinking session in Nana Plaza would be a good start … but unfortunately the lads couldn’t keep up. The photos and videos show some very pissed fellows in places like Angelwitch and Big Dog bar. How I managed to drive the camera at that stage of the night is beyond me.

^ This bloke passed out on me in Anglewitch in Nana Plaza … how one could pass out in there is beyond me as the shows are quite titillating. He managed to get himself downstairs later on but wasn’t well as you can see from the video below. This bloke is known as Jock ... hopefully he won't be too embarrassed to show his face in here

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**Wayne Kerr** · 10-09-2007, 10:00 PM

^ This bloke did a little better in that he managed to pass out in the arms of the lovely "Om" in the Big Dog bar. He's known as Dr. Jones, a young doctor bloke who's pretty in tune with all the recent advancements in the treatment of erectile dysfunction. Don't think anything could have helped him at this stage though - the video is a cracker

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**Gerbil** · 10-09-2007, 10:46 PM

Originally Posted by Wayne Kerr

^ This bloke passed out on me in Anglewitch in Nana Plaza … how one could pass out in there is beyond me as the shows are quite titillating. He managed to get himself downstairs later on but wasn’t well as you can see from the video below. This bloke is known as Jock ... hopefully he won't be too embarrassed to show his face in here

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Has he pissed himself?

**astasinim** · 10-09-2007, 10:46 PM

Ahh the old "Thai Virgin" excuse. I try to use that one at least once a trip.

**dirtydog** · 10-09-2007, 10:50 PM

So, there's you, at least 2 of your mates in that room, and then this young lady turns up, got to be a bit more to add to that part of the evening

**Gerbil** · 10-09-2007, 11:27 PM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

So, there's you, at least 2 of your mates in that room, and then this young lady turns up, got to be a bit more to add to that part of the evening

I assume she must have been a 3 holer and they got a discount rate.

**gos** · 11-09-2007, 06:35 AM

Thanks for the initial warning but depression has started to sink in I now find myself looking at flight prices and times

**kingwilly** · 11-09-2007, 07:26 AM

erm, i was gonna green ya for an awesome fishing thread, but, um, i gotta a feelign that you guys didnt make it fshing....

**Wayne Kerr** · 11-09-2007, 08:18 AM

Originally Posted by dirtydog

So, there's you, at least 2 of your mates in that room, and then this young lady turns up, got to be a bit more to add to that part of the evening

I'm sure it'll all come back to me sooner or later

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Originally Posted by kingwilly

erm, i was gonna green ya for an awesome fishing thread, but, um, i gotta a feelign that you guys didnt make it fshing....

The fishing bit is coming mate ... not awesome but fishing nonetheless

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**Jock Itch** · 11-09-2007, 01:17 PM

Well, I can vouch that my jocks were bone dry in that shot !

A big night to kick off a great trip !. Myself + Dr Jones had a shocking overnight fly in with 3 bleary eyed hours in Singapore. All up I think we notched up about 2 hours sleep and landed BKK 8am, met by Wayne.
I think 1st beer Chang was picked up at the airport for the car ride to chateau Kerr.

I thought we did reasonably well to last the drinking session all day, chilli crab and showing Dr Jones the 'hotel room'

I'll let poor wayne relay the challenges of carting two pissed blokes home

in Singapore departure lounge at present........... depression starting to set in.....

**Marmite the Dog** · 11-09-2007, 01:23 PM

I think Wayne lost my phone number...

**Jock Itch** · 11-09-2007, 01:27 PM

Originally Posted by Marmite the Dog

I think Wayne lost my phone number...

Wayne lost lots of things !!

Massive blocks of alcohol hazed memory was one !!!

Dr Jones lost his Thai virginity also......

**Wayne Kerr** · 11-09-2007, 01:58 PM

Originally Posted by Jock Itch

Well, I can vouch that my jocks were bone dry in that shot !

I'm not so sure ... well to be honest I can't remember. Maybe you just spilled something on them

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Originally Posted by Marmite the Dog

I think Wayne lost my phone number...

Nah this was the Thursday night ... didn't make it downtown on the Wednesday ... probably a good thing as things would've got real messy if these chaps had gone anywhere a few big black pints ... just have a look at how they ended up after drinking the pissy Thai stuff

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**Marmite the Dog** · 11-09-2007, 02:14 PM

Originally Posted by Wayne Kerr

just have a look at how they ended up after drinking the pissy Thai stuff

Fair enough. These Aussies can't drink for toffee can they?

**kingwilly** · 11-09-2007, 03:14 PM

Originally Posted by Marmite the Dog

I think Wayne lost my phone number...

ever noticed how nearly everyone seems to lose your number?

i did too, except you then found me in the pool bar trying mind my own business!

**kingwilly** · 11-09-2007, 03:18 PM

a problem I had...

Dear Doctor Phil,

When I retired, I could hardly wait to spend time enjoying bass fishing.

I got my own little fishing boat and tried to get my wife to join me, but she just never liked fishing.

Finally, one day at the Bait & Tackle Shop, I got to talking to Sam, the shop owner, who it turned out loves bass fishing as much as I do.

We quickly became fishing buddies.

As I said, the wife doesn't care about fishing. She not only refuses to join us, but she always complains that I spend too much time fishing.

A few weeks ago, Sam and I had the best fishing trip ever. Not only did I catch the most beautiful bass you've ever seen, only a few minutes later Sam must have caught his twin brother!

So I took a picture of Sam holding up the two nice bass that we caught and showed the picture to the wife hoping that maybe she'd get interested.

Instead she says she doesn't want me to go fishing at all anymore!

And she wants me to sell the boat!

I think she just doesn't like to see me enjoying myself.

What would you do?

Tell the wife to forget it and continue my hobby or quit fishing and sell the boat as she insists?

Thanks, FISHERMAN.

P.S. Enclosed is a picture of Sam with the two bass we caught

Dear Fisherman,
Get rid of that narrow-minded wife.

That's a nice pair of bass!

**gos** · 11-09-2007, 06:30 PM

Were those crabs 75 baht each

**Wayne Kerr** · 11-09-2007, 07:22 PM

Originally Posted by gos

Were those crabs 75 baht each

Nah mate ... that is 75 baht/0.5kg. They are piddlers ... should get about 2 or 3 crabs for about 75 baht. The mud crab was only 60 baht/0.5kg

. Bigger ones are more expensive though.

**extras** · 11-09-2007, 08:03 PM

damn, the crab and shrimp look yummy

**Wayne Kerr** · 11-09-2007, 09:39 PM

Anyway, back to the road …

Seafood Sunset on Jomtien Beach - 1

After the big night in Bangkok everyone was pretty hung over and decided that fishing was out of the question until at least the following day. Instead I suggested that we duck down to Pattaya for what I call a “Seafood Sunset” on Jomtien Beach to warm us up for a good night on the town.

Anyway, within 2 minutes of leaving my house in central Bangkok, we spotted the “wild” elephant in the video below. Don’t know who was more excited, Wayne Jnr or the boys, but I was pretty sure this was a sign of good things to come.

**Wayne Kerr** · 11-09-2007, 10:02 PM

First thing was to find a decent hotel. After much deliberation, Mrs. Kerr suggested that we stay somewhere with thick enough walls so she didn’t have to worry about getting woken up by the lads boning their new found sweethearts. Other selection criteria were a decent buffet breakfast, close to Walking Street, bar girl friendly, not so far from Soi Yodsak, and a good view. Mrs. Kerr suggested Pattaya Centre Hotel … she’s a good ideas woman she is so the old PCH it was.

^
Not sure if it’s just me but the road between Bangkok and Pattaya seems to be getting worse each time I go there. This pic pretty much sums up the chaos on the roads between the two cities ... pushbikes, motorbike driven foodstalls 10 wheel trucks, overloaded pick-ups, and horny "farangs" in a bit of a rush.

^ The lads were pretty chuffed with the view from the place. Below is one of the videos I managed to pull out which contains some footage from the 17th floor room of the Pattaya Centre Hotel across Pattaya and out to sea

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**ChiangMai noon** · 11-09-2007, 10:05 PM

this is a another super thread.
I like this one more than most of your others because of the human interest.
glad you were sober enough to film your mates in a state of god only knows what.

Thread: Wayne, Jock, and Doc Fish Thailand

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Wayne, Jock, and Doc Fish Thailand

Mud Crab and Massage in Bangkok - 1

Mud Crab and Massage in Bangkok -2

Drunk in Nana Plaza Bangkok - 1

Drunk in Nana Plaza Bangkok - 2

Seafood Sunset on Jomtien Beach – Pattaya, Thailand

Seafood Sunset on Jomtien Beach – Pattaya, Thailand

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