Thread: Pattaya: A Foreigner Steals Motorcycle From Pawn-shop

^

The vast majority of Ex-pats seem to live peacefully in Thailand and adapt to the Thai way of doing things.

The rest end up dead because they do stupid shit like stealing motorbikes and decide to play outside the rules.

This guy was a dead man walking when one has a look at his background.

Had to happen and it certainly did.

Another fuked up Ex-pat six feet under and surly more to follow as some tossers never learn.

Originally Posted by terry57

^

The vast majority of Ex-pats seem to live peacefully in Thailand and adapt to the Thai way of doing things.

.

you are probably correct.
'cept for me the thai way of doing things clashed heavily with my way of doing things.
i survived, but there were many hairy moments/incidents.
i suggest that any expat who adjusts to the "thai way of doing things" would live a life of misery and subservience.
if one had any balls at all, this would not be a life and he would have been better off staying in his own country.

The moral of this story is: Stay out of Thai jails.

Originally Posted by terry57

^

The vast majority of Ex-pats seem to live peacefully in Thailand and adapt to the Thai way of doing things.

Have you gone stark staring bonkers?

I rather think you have confused circumspection with compliance, Terence. I have never conformed to the Thai behaviour patterns and have no intention of doing so.

Grief, man, to do things the Thai way would entail having a lobotomy and the attention span of a challenged newt congenitally incapable of recognising the truth.

Also, I have never used a bum gun and am not about to start now.

Get a grip.

Originally Posted by taxexile

In this climate I think bum gun usage should be mandatory. The bum gun is thailands gift to the world.

could,nt agree more, should be mandertory in every new house build here in ozzie, even though visitors here to my place have a good old chuckle when i explain what their for..

Originally Posted by taxexile

The bum gun is thailands gift to the world.

Not sure if its "Thai" - but it is certainly Gods gift. And if it is "Thai" it would indeed be a claim to world wide fame.

Originally Posted by taxexile

Also, I have never used a bum gun and am not about to start now.

by adopting one of the more practical solutions to ones personal hygiene you could instantly end embarrassing smearage/dingleberry misery, with all its associated odours, stains and stigma.

In this climate I think bum gun usage should be mandatory.


The bum gun is thailands gift to the world.

Oh Tax, what is the matter with you these days?

That bloody bum gun is a million miles away from promoting hygiene and is probably the biggest, single reason why Hepatitis A is endemic in Thailand.

Splashing tepid water up your arse and then using your hand to wipe away the smeared faeces is not conducive to good practice in the catering trade, particularly when the staff then return to prepare food after allegedly washing their hands in more tepid water, sans soap, which they dry off using the obligatory dirty rag hanging from a nail driven into a cockroach, jingjok infested wall.

Plainly, you have gone troppo and urgently need to return to the Dales and get that head of yours screwed back on facing the right direction.

^ yeah - toilet paper makes such a big difference:


food safety
Reality: fecal matter from humans is a serious danger when transferred

from the restroom to a food prep or dining environment.

No matter if you are wiping your back side with one-, two- or ten-ply paper, or
even tar paper (for some really aggressive work), it is almost impossible to
not contaminate your finger tips, hands and potentially your sleeves and
forearms with some level of fecal contamination. This is especially true if a
person is ill and has watery diarrhea where there is potential for a real "break-
through" and spread of illness. Consider all of the other surfaces you need to
touch to get yourself out of the restroom and back to work. Don't forget that
you also need to redress yourself. What personal surfaces must your hands
come in contact with and potentially contaminate?

(their emphasis, not mine)

and:

Toilet Paper or Bidet? The Dirty Facts - The Daily Beast
Deep down, Americans have always known that wiping their rears with dry paper is ineffective; a classic survey showed that half of TP users spend their days with "fecal contamination"—anything from "wasp-colored" stains to "frank massive feces"—in their underpants

So thegent, in the interest of "full disclosure" are you a wasp stain or a "frank massive feces" kinda guy?

I'll bet you are a "massive" kinda guy, aren't you?

With decent water pressure there need be no manual element to the procedure.

An accretion of dried faeces around ones anus will attract flies and vermin, to say nothing of the foul odour fermenting away in the humid environment of ones cleft.

Think of the embarrasment should you ever have an accident and have to be carted off to hospital.


No englishman should have to suffer such embarrasment.


Your reluctance to use the bum gun and acceptance of foulness of the person suggests foreign blood runsthrough your veins.


French or belgian probably.

Originally Posted by nidhogg

Originally Posted by taxexile

The bum gun is thailands gift to the world.

Not sure if its "Thai" - but it is certainly Gods gift. And if it is "Thai" it would indeed be a claim to world wide fame.

An elementary analysis of the physics of the 'bum gun' shows the force of the water stream impacting your dingleberry infested 'bum' to have the effect of splashing aforementioned dingleberries in all directions including to land on your hands, legs, clothes and miscellaneous surfaces in the the hawng nam, (including the 'bum gun') whereupon you transfer said fecal material to your belt buckle, clothes, shoes, door handle, money, and food you then consume. The fecal material transferred to the money you hand the cashier is then transferred to others and the fecal material remaining on your shoes, legs, clothes is later transferred to others as well. Much of this feces eventually finds its way into the mouths of others.

All epidemiologists recognize the fecal-to-oral route as the number one cause of disease transmission.

Originally Posted by nidhogg

^ yeah - toilet paper makes such a big difference:


food safety
Reality: fecal matter from humans is a serious danger when transferred

from the restroom to a food prep or dining environment.

No matter if you are wiping your back side with one-, two- or ten-ply paper, or
even tar paper (for some really aggressive work), it is almost impossible to
not contaminate your finger tips, hands and potentially your sleeves and
forearms with some level of fecal contamination.

Nidhog, maybe you should go to wikipedia and look up "hand washing".

I assure you: wiping with toilet paper then washing ones hands with soap and water is infinitely more hygenic than splashing feces everywhere with a 'bum gun'.

^ you should look up "not being a total plonker" in wikki mate.

Originally Posted by nidhogg

a classic survey showed that half of TP users spend their days with "fecal contamination"—anything from "wasp-colored" stains to "frank massive feces"—in their underpants

Let's see if we can figure this out: hmmmm....is it better to have some feces in the underpants next to the asshole it emerged from until said underpants can be washed in soap and hot water

Or....

in Nidhogs universe: to have said feces splashed all over the person, clothes, bathroom, bum bun handle etc etc thereby contributing to the number one cause of disease which is fecal-to-oral contamination.

I dunno, Nidhog, whaddya think?

infinitely more hygenic than splashing feces everywhere with a 'bum gun'.

you need to work on your technique more.

Originally Posted by guyinthailand

Originally Posted by nidhogg

a classic survey showed that half of TP users spend their days with "fecal contamination"—anything from "wasp-colored" stains to "frank massive feces"—in their underpants

Let's see if we can figure this out: hmmmm....is it better to have some feces in the underpants next to the asshole it emerged from until said underpants can be washed in soap and hot water

Or....

in Nidhogs universe: to have said feces splashed all over the person, clothes, bathroom, bum bun handle etc etc.

I dunno, Nidhog, whaddya think?

See the post above.

Originally Posted by nidhogg

^ you should look up "not being a total plonker" in wikki mate.

I'd rather be a 'plonker' (whatever that is) than someone who thinks spraying feces everywhere is hygenic.

Originally Posted by taxexile

infinitely more hygenic than splashing feces everywhere with a 'bum gun'.

you need to work on your technique more.

he seems to be confusing washing his arse with songkran.

Originally Posted by nidhogg

Originally Posted by guyinthailand

in Nidhogs universe: to have said feces splashed all over the person, clothes, bathroom, bum bun handle etc etc.

I dunno, Nidhog, whaddya think?

See the post above.

And Nidhog's answer is.....

better "to have said feces splashed all over the person, clothes, bathroom, bum bun handle etc etc."

^ you are the one walking around with shit in yer keks mate - in your brain as well apparently.

but, nidhog, you're the one who's splashing the shit everywhere and therefore have gotten it fecal-to-oral and hence bloodstream and therefore the shit literally is in your brain.

which is probably why you're not thinking clearly about this.

Originally Posted by guyinthailand

but, nidhog, you're the one who's splashing the shit everywhere .

So you opine, but fail to support.

I can assure you that I do not undertake washing my arse as some sort of mini songkran festival. A directed spray, a mop with a tissue while sitting on a seat toilet. You seem to imagine its done with a super soaker from 20 paces.

Whether paper or spray, hand washing is compulsory - but, more for your information as my ablutions seem to be of such great interest to you - I take my daily dump in the morning, and SHOWER immediately after the toilet.

Now - my arse is squeaky clean, and will remain so. The mix of fecal matter and sweat dripping down your crack is, I am sure a pleasure to you, but I doubt many others.

After 13 years of using the bum gun, I read this thread.

As an experiment, I reverted to paper..........Just the once, mind.

Originally Posted by nidhogg

I can assure you that I do not undertake washing my arse as some sort of mini songkran festival. A directed spray, a mop with a tissue while sitting on a seat toilet. You seem to imagine its done with a super soaker from 20 paces.

Didn't I already explain the physics to you, Nidhog?

A stream of water sprays the shit everywhere.