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  1. #76
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    Quote Originally Posted by JPPR2
    Exactly, which is why I referenced it in both incidents. It was only their side.
    Normally in Europe or America where middle aged men, ie late 50's marry young pretty 20 odd year olds they tend to be extremely rich and can cater to their trophy wifes every whim, I doubt that happened in your 2 friends cases.

  2. #77
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    Quote Originally Posted by dirtydog
    ie late 50's marry young pretty 20 odd year olds they tend to be extremely rich and can cater to their trophy wifes every whim, I doubt that happened in your 2 friends cases.
    Up untill I met my new wife I only had a cycling proficency badge and a 25 yards breast stoke certificate in my cabinet

  3. #78
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    Quote Originally Posted by nigelandjan View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by dirtydog
    ie late 50's marry young pretty 20 odd year olds they tend to be extremely rich and can cater to their trophy wifes every whim, I doubt that happened in your 2 friends cases.
    Up untill I met my new wife I only had a cycling proficency badge and a 25 yards breast stoke certificate in my cabinet
    I think DD is probably right to a great degree about my 2 acquaintances. Both are pretty much average "Joes" based on our talks but both appeared to me to have got caught up in a relationship way to fast and were not thinking clearly. In fairness to them and a lot of men here, it is an extremely easy thing to do.

    As for the wealthy men, they pretty much behave exactly how DD stated it. I have witnessed that as well. They love to flaunt the cash to their gals as they get all googly eyed. I usually chuckle when I see them in public. Its far to obvious. They actually stand out.

    I am, for all intents and purposes, like the 2 guys I met which is why I have sympathy for their situation. I am really an average guy. I am not wealthy but clearly not strapped but I came here to enjoy the country, shed myself of all the materialistic values BS, live with less and yet enjoy a far better quality of life. I wanted to travel and move around. Ride my sport bike, Fish, drink excellent teas, eat incredibly good food and of course drool over what are arguably the best looking woman on the planet. I think one big plus for me is I did not move here because of a woman. I threw marriage and children ideas out the window when I boarded the plane at SFO. I landed and said OK....Lets just relax and take my time. First up....Buy a Japanese spec'd GP bike and have some fun. Mission accomplished. Meeting my nurse GF at the night market was just a fluke but one I am glad it happened..

  4. #79
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    Quote Originally Posted by somtamslap View Post

    Be skint for a few years then see who's still around.
    Never a truer word.

  5. #80
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    Quote Originally Posted by nigelandjan View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by dirtydog
    ie late 50's marry young pretty 20 odd year olds they tend to be extremely rich and can cater to their trophy wifes every whim, I doubt that happened in your 2 friends cases.
    Up untill I met my new wife I only had a cycling proficency badge and a 25 yards breast stoke certificate in my cabinet
    I have a trophy girlfriend but she is one of the ones made of shiny gold coloured plastic with bag of sand inside to stop it from falling over as I cannot afford the running costs on a jules rimet model

    Nice story Rick and good luck. Hope you are planning on getting a long term lease on the block of land before you shell out all your savings on a house build. Sounds like you are very happy but you never really know where you will be relationship-wise in 5 or 10 years and you can't really start again with wealth accumulation at your age.

    Although if your income is social security then maybe you are pretty safe.

  6. #81
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    Quote Originally Posted by JPPR2
    shed myself of all the materialistic values BS, live with less and yet enjoy a far better quality of life. I wanted to travel and move around. Ride my sport bike, Fish, drink excellent teas, eat incredibly good food and of course drool over what are arguably the best looking woman on the planet
    Sounds good

    Quote Originally Posted by JPPR2
    Meeting my nurse GF at the night market was just a fluke but one I am glad it happened..
    50/20??

  7. #82
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    all the best of luck living up north.
    I retired to Thailand in 84 but will need to work till i die.
    College fees start next year for my daughter,

    Enjoy it as long as u can and u made a great choice

  8. #83
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    Quote Originally Posted by BarnacleBill View Post
    Rick. I see you are a "bike" man. Get yourself a bike and join one of the many biker clubs around Thailand. They are well organised, the members are great fellas, and they look after each other - As all "real bikers" do! You'll be able to see lots of Thailand with them and make many Thai friends
    BarnacleBill, I will be looking at gettting my Harley over through the back door once I arrive. As ususal, some TD member have given me some insight and will research it once I get in country.

  9. #84
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    Just to update everyone, I am now up near Carson City, Nevada at my mother's house for a visit and have pretty much packed everything up. I don't know if everyone understands what we call a garage sale, but I had one last weekend and sold a fair amount of my things that I will not need anymore and made some money at the same time.

    There are only about nine more days before the flight out and the only things left are to cancel my cell phone service and wire some money over to my Thai account. There are some things left, but I will either give them away to leave them here for my kids. One can never say never about coming back and this house would be my plan B since my sister and I will inherit it at some point in time and I am always welcome back if things don't work out. I do not plan on it, but one never knows.

  10. #85
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    Quote Originally Posted by pescator View Post
    Best of luck to you, Rick.
    It definitely seems like you have done some serious homework prior to your relocation.

    But allow me to ask you this, why on earth did you decide on having another child at your age and in Thailand?
    Notwithstanding the fact that you already have 3, who are grown ups by now.

    Good question, but I will try to answer it the best I can. I do understand that my son will not have his father around when he reaches middle age, but then how many Thai children have that? My lady has a very good family and he will be raised more by them anyway. The family unit is completely different in Thailand than in the west and my lady raised two son's of her older sister while she was away bringing in some sort of income to support them. Many fathers in Thailand go work in other countries since they can not make a decent wage. This leaves them gone for years out of their children's life.

    How many of you have seen a child raised by a mother alone in this country, or by a sister, aunt and uncle or grandparents? It is the norm here and a system I considered before agreeing to have another child. Children want to be loved and that can come from many sources when you have a family concept that exists like Thailand's. It sounds like someone is basing their opinion on how things are in the west, not how they are in Thailand. It is a common mistake many of us make.

  11. #86
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    A long term lease on the land is good advise. Welcome to LOS hope you will become very old and stay very happy.

  12. #87
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    Finally got caught up reading the thread since I have been on the road and pretty busy the last week or so. First, I would like to thank all the well-wishers here on TD. I look foraward to chattng with all of you once I get internet in Thailand.

    It seems to be a normal response to have concern about investing in a situation where you really don't own what you buy. This is human nature and I would also agree with most of the statements made. My investment has been over the last five years and not taken lightly. Again, I did not invest more than I can walk away from. The land is all in her name, but I do intend to have it changed to my son's after some delicate conversations. It will then be his and he will not be able to sell it until he reaches the age of 20. This is something I learned on another thread and very good advice.

    In regard to my own financial stability. I will retain my US pharmacist license and I have hired men that were in their 70's to work. My hope is that I will not be one of those, but it is a good back up. Pharmacy is a profession that you can practice as long as your brain works. It is not physical and you can find jobs sitting behind a computer all day if that is what you like. As for my current income, I mentioned that I am collecting Social Security and that is mine that nobody, other than the US government, can take away. If things went bad, it is more than enough to stay in Thailand and move to another city and live comfortably or move to another country such as Laos, Cambodia or the PI. I do not intend to run back home unless things get exremely bad.

    The relationship thing is a crap shoot no matter where you reside in this world. It just happens that I agree Thai women are the most beautiful and I enjoy looking at nice scenery. Nobody knows what the future holds and that is why there are both sides of the story on this thread. If the risk was not worth taking, none of us would be here.

    I will let everyone know how the transition goes and maybe someone out there will learn something if they are thinking about doing the same thing. All the posts have been great and lots of insight for those others that are interested in how to move to Thailand, or any other country for that matter.

  13. #88
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    ^^^It can be a mistake, but you are still a farang and still have those values inculcated in you, so take note

  14. #89
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    Chok dee, Rick. Keep us posted.

  15. #90
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    Quote Originally Posted by DrAndy View Post
    ^^^It can be a mistake, but you are still a farang and still have those values inculcated in you, so take note
    Will do Dr.

  16. #91
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    ^^

    As long as people seem to be interested in this topic, I will keep posting. Thanks

  17. #92
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    I enjoy the read, post as you have time. Be a far different feeling knowing you are not packing up in 3 weeks to go back to the US. When people are posting seriously there are many things that can be learned here. I enjoy the bantering and fellow TD posters comments.

    I would say the toughest mental thing anyone can do moving abroad is letting go of their western ideals and expectations and accept your new culture and embrace it. It is never going to be like what you grew up with so fighting it to make it that way is futile. Your values are your values. Those are deeply set in you along with your integrity as a human being. Those should never change no matter where you live unless of course you were a total schmuck where you left and you want to change but chances are slim that would happen. To many years of poor conditioning.

    There are no books on how to live YOUR life so its yours to write.

    I enjoy living in Thailand. I am comfortable, have few concerns, definitely have a better quality of life, eat way better and live virtually stress free except for those quick adrenaline rushes when I am cutting buses on my moto in BKK traffic at 50kms. Actually maybe thats a good stress. I am not a Harley guy , always been a knee-dragger but I appreciate all moto's. Good luck on trying to back door your Moto RC. I researched many avenues and all were a ton of work and no guarantees. To get it certified, validated and then green booked was a daunting task. I wanted to bring my 2005 Yamaha R1LE 50 Year anniversary moto over and the cost was simply uneconomical. The crate and freight alone was pricey. I even investigated options using a grey market importer. Needles to say I threw in the towel and sold it. I would have had double the cost of the moto in the end and parts were not easy to come by. All would have to be ordered out of Japan. So I searched local and I love my LiL Grey market import Honda RVF 400RR GP Race bike. It actually works out better over here for a ton less and parts are easy to come by. You might think about buying a HD here.

    See you soon

  18. #93
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    Quote Originally Posted by rickschoppers View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by pescator View Post
    Best of luck to you, Rick.
    It definitely seems like you have done some serious homework prior to your relocation.

    But allow me to ask you this, why on earth did you decide on having another child at your age and in Thailand?
    Notwithstanding the fact that you already have 3, who are grown ups by now.

    Good question, but I will try to answer it the best I can. I do understand that my son will not have his father around when he reaches middle age, but then how many Thai children have that? My lady has a very good family and he will be raised more by them anyway. The family unit is completely different in Thailand than in the west and my lady raised two son's of her older sister while she was away bringing in some sort of income to support them. Many fathers in Thailand go work in other countries since they can not make a decent wage. This leaves them gone for years out of their children's life.

    How many of you have seen a child raised by a mother alone in this country, or by a sister, aunt and uncle or grandparents? It is the norm here and a system I considered before agreeing to have another child. Children want to be loved and that can come from many sources when you have a family concept that exists like Thailand's. It sounds like someone is basing their opinion on how things are in the west, not how they are in Thailand. It is a common mistake many of us make.

    I strongly disagree with you and I have been in Thailand and or Asia almost half my life. Although it is true this happens with THAI dads, more than i hate to admit it, very seldom happens to Farangs. We seem to have a stronger attachment to our children and want to be there when they are growing up. Think back to ur own kids? Would u have liked to have them grow up with out you? You will be over 70 when he is 10!! That's just not right .
    I really do not like seeing mid age ( ie over 54 or so) with new born babies knowing they will not be around to offer them a western perspective on life and a western education Once ur gone ur child will be raised thai style, ( forget keeping them in a international school, as that money could be better spent elsewhere) and if ur ok with that, fine., But for me i would hate to see my daughter raised the way her mom was.

    Having a child and knowing most likely ur not going to see them graduate hs is just wrong.

    AS to putting the land in ur childs name. that is easily done as i placed my land in my daughters name with a good friend as her guardian ( that was so I could sell it, which I did) Your son can sell it on his own once he is 16 . I am glad i sold and now much prefer renting.

    AS to dual citizenship. My daughter holds thai and us passports an citizenship. Did not have to choose. BUT as far as a boy goes when he is 18, if he still holds his thai citizenship he will need do his military duty or u might be able to pay off someone to fix his papers up country/ The other obtion is to give up the thai art and keep his US and wait till he is 25 and then reclaim his thai citizenship

    Just to add about bring ur MC in. I went and lived in Ca in 1998 and that lasted a whole year. Anyway while i was there i brought a 1970 Triumph T 100 in box's and made it like new. Got myself a carnet in SF, ( about $150 ) box'd it up and sent it to Penanag, ( $450 or so)
    then went down and drove it back into Thailand where it has been since running on CA plates. More than a few others have done this withe their bikes ranging from Harleys on down to those Jap things. IT can be done. U can LEGALLY bring it in for up to 6 months at a time and then it needs go to a border.
    Mine has never left the country in 12 years and in fact only been off Phuket island twice :-) If u really love it, Bring it.
    Last edited by Phuketrichard; 04-10-2011 at 09:12 AM.
    "I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol or insanity, but they've always worked for me" HST

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    Have a good life enjoyit while you have iit take care and be safe

  20. #95
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    ^^
    Phuketrichard, I can respect what you are saying about my age as a father but respectfully disagree. When I think of my childhood, my father was never around since he was in the military and was on TDY most the time. He had very little to do with my upbringing. Is it the best way to grow up? Maybe not, but even in the US there are many situations where a son rarely sees his father. The decision to have a child was more on the part of my lady and her family. If you have lived in Asia as long as you state, you will know there is tremendous family pressure for young women to have a child. I think in my particular case, she finally found someone that would not run away from the responsibility even though I was much older. It is a dynamic you see all too often in Thailand and is not frowned on as much as in the States.

    As far as dual citizenship and land goes, I will let my son pick what country he wants to live in and he will have the land if he wants to stay in Thailand. Military service is done very similar to our old lottery system and is not 100% mandatory. I know several young "poor" men in the village that were up for military duty that were not selected and did not go. Personally, I think the military is a good experience if you are floundering as a young man. It forces you to get your shit together and become a man. What happens to my son remains to be seen.

    The motorcyle thing is still up in the air. I do like your idea and will keep it in mind. Having my HD over in Thailand is not a thing I have to do, but more of a nice thing to have. Purchasing one in Thailand is hard for me to swallow with the prices and my HD is already paid for and the cost for shipping it similar to yours does not sound prohibitive as well. Time will tell if I get it over to Thailand or not. I did manage to put some bike parts in my suitcases over the past 5 years, but not near enough to build a complete bike. Mostly custom painted tins and some other parts I may be able to use on some rice burners.

  21. #96
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    Quote Originally Posted by Phuketrichard
    Just to add about bring ur MC in. I went and lived in Ca in 1998 and that lasted a whole year. Anyway while i was there i brought a 1970 Triumph T 100 in box's and made it like new. Got myself a carnet in SF, ( about $150 ) box'd it up and sent it to Penanag, ( $450 or so)
    then went down and drove it back into Thailand where it has been since running on CA plates. More than a few others have done this withe their bikes ranging from Harleys on down to those Jap things. IT can be done. U can LEGALLY bring it in for up to 6 months at a time and then it needs go to a border.
    Mine has never left the country in 12 years and in fact only been off Phuket island twice :-) If u really love it, Bring it.
    My comments on the method Phuket Richard recommends as I did a small bit of research down that avenue as well sometime back. Riding around in Phuket and Pattaya with a non plated moto might fly where foreigners are in high concentration and money buys you out but if you should ride or live outside those areas and you get caught in a roadside dragnet your bike is likely to be impounded. They will take it and to get it back is a long and painful process and they know it. A guy I followed along with back doored a pretty rare Canadian spec'd Yam R1. Had it there for a few years then got tapped. They took it and he has all but given up trying to get it back as they are mandating he provide a legitimate invoice. Once that is supplied then tax will apply, If you chose to go that far then comes validation and cert at DOLT, then green book fees. The costs are exorbitant. Call a few guys at Red Baron in BKK, they can tell you the pitfalls. I follow a few Thai moto websites and spoke with a few shops and it can be a messy deal. I am not saying it will not work and it appears PhuketRichard has slipped right in. I am by far no expert on importing motos but the risk is pretty large. However if you have a bike that you can part with if tagged then no big deal, I might swing the risk too and if I get popped they can have it. I would think a HD would be a pricey proposition.

    And Yes RC, HD's are big money in Thailand as are any Big Bikes. I looked at GSXR's, Yam R1's, CBR's etc. You will drop a house on one.

  22. #97
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    Quote Originally Posted by JPPR2
    When people are posting seriously there are many things that can be learned here. I enjoy the bantering and fellow TD posters comments.
    make your mind up! actually, the bantering can also have a serious side - I often find humour is one way of showing the other side to an argument
    Quote Originally Posted by Phuketrichard
    Having a child and knowing most likely ur not going to see them graduate hs is just wrong
    That is a little judgemental, and not very kind

    It would certainly be sad, and I am sure any father would prefer to live longer and see his daughter grow up, get married have grandchildren, see them grow up...

    but if two people make a choice to have a kid, at whatever age, up to them and hopefully their kid will be happy and will grow up with both parents

    but life is not always organised like that. My wife's father died when she was 2, so she really never had a dad, but she was brought up by her elder sisters help

    An older father can have a lot of advantages too; with maturity one would hope he would be a better father and teacher to his kid than when he was younger
    I have reported your post

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    I will be 60 next week. My son by my Thai wife will be three in January. I certainly don't regret having him and if given a choice, I'm sure he would rather have been born to an older father than not be born at all.
    Should I pass away while he is still young, I believe he would still choose to have been born.

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    Rick, thanks a lot for a good thread and honest serious input by all.
    I too contemplate thai retirement but it is some years off.

    I have been a bit in Isaan too and have noted the empty villas that are in several villages. Looks a lot like "farang moved out, and can't sell luxury villa in the middle of nowhere". But I gather you have considered this as well and made an informed choice.

    As for the child I agree Western men are more attached to their kids than Thai men (from what I have observed - it is not because I am prejudiced), and it is nice to read how you want to provide for your son's future. Whether or not to have a child at your age is a moot point, because now he is here and then you deal with it. Things happen.
    It will be interesting to hear how the "delicate" conversation with the wife about transferring ownership from her to him works out.
    Actually, if your wife is truly longterm trustworthy you might consider letting her keep the house. Some of the young thai men I have heard about have little sense. He might sell the house at an early age to cover a new pickup truck, gambling debts or whatever. To keep the house under control of a wiser person (mother, guardian etc) might be a good plan.

    Hope to see you some day up in Udon

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    Quote Originally Posted by Colorado View Post
    I will be 60 next week. My son by my Thai wife will be three in January. I certainly don't regret having him and if given a choice, I'm sure he would rather have been born to an older father than not be born at all.
    Should I pass away while he is still young, I believe he would still choose to have been born.

    you can believe what you want, but you are probably right if you are a good father

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