The Expat Test!

[ayayeyey]

If you are brave enough, submit your scores by replying below for TV (AND NOW!) all of Teak Door to see what status is really behind the Username...

I'll go first, 23 points.

24 points

[joepattaya]

What a crap test.

I would score poorly on the test (couldn't be bothered doing it for real), but I think the fact that I've only spent 20 months out of the last 150 in my own country would make me an expat.

But apart from that, who cares if they pass the expat test or not?

Do you think that you would pass any test at all?

[TizMe]

I passed my driving test on the day that I turned 17.

[bios]

Spent the last 30 years in 40+ countries, children in just 4 of them-in contact with just one, live but don't work here, no real home, own a bike, don't own, need, desire a wife/gf, b4 somebody jumps-I'm not gay
Still, I would score poorly in this test. Open return ticket>yes, but open forevaa and return to my last destination which is certainly nowhere near the place I was born.

[dogblower]

[quote from ThaiVisa 2007-08-05 01:03:12]
Are you an Expat???

Am I an Expat??

Theres no easy way of explaining this one, Dr Burito has polled for what defines an Expat. But in lifes quest for answers on whether you ARE an expat look no further than taking the Jims Knight Patented 'EXPAT TEST!' Smile

INSTRUCTIONS FOR UNDERTAKING THE EXPAT TEST!

The more points you attain the better.....

For each question (truthfully) choose only one answer that applies to you....

If there is no such answer contact the author for finesse point allocation!

No cheating, talking or other mischief! The Moderators are now Invigilating!

The time allowed for this test is 10 minutes or the time it takes the Moderating king to drink 4 Bottles of Chang! Cheers

Enough said and let the test begin!


Stage one - Length of Stay, travel and documentation.

How many times have you visited thailand previously?

Never - 0

1 to 5 times - 1

6 to 10 times - 2

10 times + - 3



What plane ticket did you arrive in the country on?

A closed Return ticket - 0

An open 6 month return - 1.5

A one-way all or nothing ticket! - 2



What visa is currently stamped in your passport?

A tourist visa - 0

A double entry tourist visa - 1

A single entry visa non-imm 'o' - 2

A multi entry visa non-imm 'o' - 3

non-imm 'b' (business visa) - 4

Retirement visa! - 6

I don't need a visa stamp! I hold a thai passport/citizenship! - 15


Stage 2 - Country specific questions...

What driving license do you hold?

None - 0

UK/Intl. driving license (bike or car) - 1

Thai driving license (car) - 3

Thai driving license (bike and car) - 4


How much thai language can you speak?

Nothing apart from very rudimentary basic bargirl thai phrases! - 0

Basic phrases and numbers - 0.5

Colloquial thai - 2

Advanced thai (hold a v. good conversation) - 3

Fluent/Native speaker thai (and writing) - 5


What line of work are you involved in?

Nothing at all! - 1 ( 2 If Retired)

Teacher / Divemaster - 2

Dive Instructor / Bar Manager (can also be silent investor partner) - 3

Company / Office worker - 4

Offshore work (Middle East, Rigs, DSVs, FPSOs etc) - 4.5

Offshore work in thailand (Rigs, DSVs, FPSOs etc) - 5


If you are working in Thailand do you hold a work permit?

No - 0 (You cheeky monkey!)

Yes - 3


What is your accommodation?

Hotel - 0

Guesthouse - 1

Renting a House / Apartment - 2

Ownership of a house (via a company) - 3

Ownership of house (via a thai) - 3.5


What vehicles do you have as your own?

Nothing - 0

Bicycle - 0.5

Motorbike (Rental) - 1

Motorbike (owned in thai name without access to papers) - 1.5

Motorbike (owned in thai name with papers) - 2.5

Motorbike (owned in your name with papers) - 3.5

Car (owned in a thai name without access to papers) - 3

Car (owned in a thai name with access papers) - 4

Car (owned in your name with papers) - 5


What finances support your living while in thailand?

Cash in the bank - 1

Cash in the bank + income from pension / assets - 2

Cash in the bank + income from work - 3

Cash in the bank + income from pension / assets and income from work - 4

I have so much cash i never have to worry about other sources of income!! - 10

What best describes your own psyche/character in Thailand?

A tattooed, unrepentant, border-line psychotic criminal on-the-run type, from whom no man, woman or child is safe! - Minus 5

A hard drinking, grizzled, reckless womaniser who is ok in small doses around other (more balanced) expats - Minus 2

A married, hard working person who just wants to settle down with his new children in retirement - 2

An Indiana Jones type of guy; a bit of a ladies man/sugar daddy, bit rough around the edges, enjoys a few drinks here and there with the boys, travels about a bit and is a good friend to others - 2

An quiet, contented, enigmatic, mysterious person. Your a solitary kind of guy who has few friends, but prefer your own company. Everyone see's you around, but nobodys quite sure what the h_ell you're up to. Is he a teacher? A Divemaster? Who knows? - 2

A well-connected person who is on a long-term expat retirement package and quite frankly, has never had it this good compared to the others - 3

A creative genius / eccentric who is on a once in a life time quest to try and better themselves and others while going with the flow of Thailands many quirks and oddities. - 3.5


END OF TEST


This concludes the EXPAT TEST! Please sign your test sheets accordingly and pass them to a moderator for marking!

Well lets see how you've done.

SCORES -

2 - 8 points. Fail! The results seem to indicate you are a tourist! Enjoy you're stay! Grade F-

9 - 17 points. Fail! But this result seems to show you have some roots here in thailand but you still need some effort to get towards the next step in expatdom! Grade D+

18 - 26 points. Border-line Pass! This score indicates you are either an expat or Semi-Expat, based here in thailand for short to long durations at time. You can consider this score showing you to be an 'Honoury Expat!'. Look out for deserving expat-wannabes! They may need your help in passing the test! Grade B- Smile

27 + points. Pass! WELL DONE! You have passed the Expat Test with flying colours! With this accolade Thailand is surely yours for the taking! Just take care out there on your adventures! Grade A+

If you are brave enough, submit your scores by replying below for all of TV to see what status is really behind the Username
Jimsknight: 23.5 points.[/quote]

So what prompted the name change? And why bother to repeat a "test", unamended, that you got so much flak for on another forum?

[kingwilly]

So what prompted the name change? And why bother to repeat a "test", unamended, that you got so much flak for on another forum?

a 2 line answer but you've quoted about 180 lines. FFS

[nidhogg]

So what prompted the name change? And why bother to repeat a "test", unamended, that you got so much flak for on another forum?

name change or just plagiarism?

[dogblower]

a 2 line answer but you've quoted about 180 lines. FFS

Just wanted to demonstrate that it was exactly the same post and I didn't think a link to the original would be accepted, especially since it was from TV.

[dogblower]

name change or just plagiarism?

It was such a lame "test" that I didn't think anyone would be bothered copying it. I made an assumption therefore that it was the same person trying it again.

[Slipstream]

It's not meant to be taken seriously mate
You get back to blowing some dogs there's a good poster

[kingwilly]

Just wanted to demonstrate that it was exactly the same post and I didn't think a link to the original would be accepted, especially since it was from TV.

links to TV are fine.

[JuniorExPat]

"I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member."


JxP

[gjbkk]

I got 35 and some of the questions as Bobcock said are fairly dumb work in an office or own a company here, gets you less points than an offshore worker.

[Slipstream]

Sorry for offending the office wallers and company guys but if you don't like the test, don't bloody do it!
Simple as

[Norton]

"I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member."

"I don't care to club any member belonging on me"

Norton

[Rural Surin]

39 points....how is it that Euro-types living in the "undeveloped" countries{temporary or permanent} are refered to as "ex-pats" and those third-worlders living in the West {temporary or permanent} are considered "immigrants?

[TizMe]

Expats are never going to become citizens of their host countries.
Immigrants will at the first oportunity.